Ex only wants to see one child

[Etheelle]

Ex and I have a toddler and I’m pregnant. He’s mentally unstable and decided I had an affair and am pregnant to someone else (not true). He has ended things, and I have said fine, because I’m exhausted of living like this.

He’s now said he wants to see the toddler every other weekend but won’t see the baby at all. It’s only early days in the pregnancy and we are currently still living together as we need to sell our house, so contact doesn’t need to be agreed yet, but what is likely to happen in this scenario?

I would be happy for him to see the toddler on a limited basis (he wants EOWE, I’m not keen on overnights due to ) but I feel this would be psychologically damaging to the baby when they’re old enough to realise?

I have had a conversation with his older children’s mum, and she said he was exactly the same during her pregnancy with their youngest. Accused her of cheating, pushed for an abortion: exactly the same.

She stayed with him until the baby was born then had an exit affair and is still with the other man.

I had thought his paranoia was down to being cheated on but it seems it’s an integral part of his psyche.

I do think that lost people suggesting a TOP as an option are doing it just because the father isn’t interested, but because of consideration of a mother who may struggle to be a solo parent of 1, without adding a baby into the mix.

I wouldn’t really take much notice of what he’s saying about not seeing the baby. Not yet. People say lots of shitty things mostly to hurt the other person.

I’m not under any illusions that it’ll be easy, but I’ve got a supportive network and plenty of other women manage it. I think it’ll be preferable to having an abortion I don’t want.

I wasn’t dismissing your situation, please don’t think that.

I just meant that I think the people making that suggestion were doing it flippantly.

if you’re in a position where you have support then I’m sure you’ll be fine with your children