Ex wants to go for Primary Carer of DS (UC)

[StripeySeaCreature]

I have PC of both children as ex works very long hours. Ex now wants PC of our teen as he wants the UC element and CB. He’s also talking about picking teen up at 8.30pm so he can sleep over his to get PC status. Opinions please?

What is the current schedule like, and what is he saying it should change to?

For our oldest it is 50/50 and will remain 50/50. I’m not working at the moment and him having PC status will mean I will lose £400 UC per month and £70 CB. He wants to pick up teen at 830/9pm so he has the overnight

What does teen want ?

Why start a new thread?

it isnt at all reasonable of him.

Exactly this.

You've got pages and pages explaining how stupid this all is on your other thread, what are you hoping for by asking the same question again?

Why are you not working?

How old is your teenager? Will your ex be working while they’re with him (I.e., they’ll be home alone)?

Surely the answers are:

ask the kid what THEY want
get a job.

If it’s 50:50 doesn’t that mean you aren’t the primary carer? That there isn’t one?

@BruFord But surely it's not reasonable to "penalise" a father who is working hard to financially provide for his kids, especially when the mother doesn't appear to be doing the same?

@everychildmatters I was just wondering what the setup would be if the teenager lives with them most of the time.

@BruFord I understand. Think the plan is 50/50. In which case mum won't receive maintenance and, if two children, father can counter-claim CB so mother will only be in receipt of CB for one. It will be imperative she finds work.

This, but the idea of getting a job is anathema to many Mnetters!
'How can I get a job?! My baby needs me! He's only 17!! I've been a SAHM for 25 YEARS!!!😭😭'

@CaptainFuture Agreed. But then if mother is in receipt of a good amount of maintenance etc then is she better off not bothering to get a job?

I have a job! Returning in a couple of months (part time)

Surely it's "he's only 204 months and teens needs even more support and care as a newborn baby"

I have a job thanks! I’ve just been off for a while to care for our other child who is disabled. I’ll be returning to my job very soon

Ffs 🤦🏻‍♀️

Our other child is severely disabled so yes he does need as much care and support as a newborn baby, thank you!

Hang on haven't you only separated incredibly recently. Like only told your parents today recently

@StripeySeaCreature I'm sorry to hear that. Do you get disability benefit for your child and things like that to help financially? I'm just thinking things might get tough if it ever were to go 50/50 from a money pov?

I would tell him that if he wants PC, you'll do EOW and that's all.

Ignore the posters having fun being as bitchy as possible. They are sad cases.

@CherryVanillaPie It seems a bit odd OP didn't mention this very salient detail in her initial post?

op, where will your teen be till 8:30pm? If at yours then I’d say no, I’m not useful free day parenting, ex can’t collect and claim the night. They have to provide from 3:30.

what does teen want? That’s relevant at that age.