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Divorce/separation

Here you'll find divorce help and support from other Mners. For legal advice, you may find Advice Now guides useful.

Original poster

Could I go for spousal maintenance

30 replies

Cantsleep22 · 31/10/2019 17:05

Me and ex-husband split 12 weeks ago. We are currently going through mediation. We haven’t come to the financials yet as we are sorting children first so I want to be as prepared as I can be when that comes.

He earns 56k I earn 12.5k. My earnings and career took a back seat when I had my daughter 7 years ago. I went to uni, was a manager and had a promising career ahead. I happily sacrificed this to work part time to raise the children. We also have an 11 month old

I have heard about spousal maintenance, taking into consideration how much more my ex earns how would I go about applying for this?

OP posts:
Original poster
Cantsleep22 · 31/10/2019 17:07

Also meant to say when we met he was earning the same amount as me and the. took a pay cut so he could train to go into the management side. I supported him financially through all of that. Would this be taken into account?

OP posts:
millymollymoomoo · 31/10/2019 18:48

I’m not a lawyer but I’d think on that salary it probably isn’t spousal maintenance territory or if it is then time bound for a few years to help you get back on your feet. Would also depend on other assets - are there any?

maternity123qwe · 31/10/2019 18:50

How long were you married for? What amount would you intend to go for?

maternity123qwe · 31/10/2019 18:52

www.moneyadviceservice.org.uk/en/articles/clean-break-or-spousal-maintenance-after-divorce-or-dissolution

Have a read this is useful and helps explain it all

PrettyPurse · 31/10/2019 19:01

My XH and l had similar salaries. Courts prefer clean break orders and expect both people to earn their own.

I wasn't awarded any maintenance even though my solicitor did try. I actually said no in the end as l didn't want my XH to be paying for me also once l started my benefits claim l could afford to live without his input. He pays child maintenance though

maternity123qwe · 31/10/2019 19:14

As the previous poster says as well you will be entitled to various benefits also and also child maintenance which would be around £400 :£500 depending on how often there is overnight contact

CarrieMayBe · 31/10/2019 19:34

Do you have a solicitor? If so, they will advise you how to go about making a claim against your ex for spousal maintenance.

I was awarded it, on a siding scale until my youngest turns 16 (it will have run for 8yrs by that point). It’s actually a global maintenance order which is both spousal and child maintenance combined in one payment each month. Ex would have to go back to court to prove he can no longer afford to pay it/I am no longer in need of it - it was done this way mainly because he stopped paying maintenance altogether during our divorce and I had to open a CMS case in order to get any from him.

I had been a SAHM for the last 10yrs of our marriage, we had 4 DCs and the only reason he could build his successful business to the degree he had was because I took care of everything regarding the children and our home. I did have a job by the time our case went to court but was only part time due to the children and I was earning roughly 10% the amount he was.

Significantly, my ex openly admitted he wouldn’t be able to share childcare during the school holidays or before/after school due to his work commitments which obviously meant I would struggle to earn enough after paying for childcare - which, incidentally, is almost non-existent in our rural area.

I hate the idea of my ex financially supporting me but I have little choice for the time being. I would rather swallow my pride and know that my children are living comfortably than having to watch every single penny and them going without. The maintenance order will cease immediately upon my cohabitation with anyone or marriage.

Alternatively, you may be entitled to a much bigger share of your joint assets to enable you to be in a financially better position - is there enough equity, for example, for you to be mortgage free in another property?

Original poster
Cantsleep22 · 31/10/2019 19:40

We have a joint mortgage with only 50k equity because we have only lived here a year. He has just started paying child maintenance of around £600 per month but was wondering if there was any way I could apply for anything further to enable us to stay in the home longer. My eldest moved schools when we moved house so don’t want to uproot her further if can be helped. I could afford to mortgage on my own elsewhere but would be a considerably smaller house. I can’t afford to buy him out as this house is worth £310k

OP posts:
PrettyPurse · 31/10/2019 20:17

You need to get a CETV on his and your pension. It was thanks to his huge pension compared to my small one that l kept the house

Original poster
Cantsleep22 · 31/10/2019 21:15

What’s a CETV?

OP posts:
Otter71 · 01/11/2019 06:19

Basically pension transf value. May take ages to come though particularly if either of you work in the public sector. .

PrettyPurse · 01/11/2019 10:47

Mine took 4 months as I'm in the NHS.

Original poster
Cantsleep22 · 01/11/2019 11:04

Not sure if his pension is worth going for? He’s only been paying in for 6 years and is only 32 so not a lot in the pot. I was hoping to ask for most the equity in the house in order to afford a mortgage elsewhere

OP posts:
Elementalillusions · 01/11/2019 11:47

I’m fairly certain spousal maintenance is only even considered in cases where one spouse is a high earner and it has been a long marriage.

I very much doubt they would even entertain your claim if he is earning 56k and you have only been around a decade.

You would be better to try and come to some kind of arrangement where you can stay in the family home long term and he continue to pay a portion of the mortgage with the view to get half of any equity when the house is sold in the future.

FreckledLeopard · 01/11/2019 11:50

I can't imagine you'll get spousal maintenance when he's on that salary. It's usually for extremely high earners. Also, Courts tend to prefer a clean break where possible.

PrettyPurse · 01/11/2019 12:10

Why do you think you should have more equity though? He needs to be able to afford somewhere too

PrettyPurse · 01/11/2019 12:13

Staying in the home is called a Mersher order. Again this isn't approved of overly by the courts either. Plus getting him to pay towards the mortgage and having to afford his own place is not fair on him.

When l looked into it, l would have to prove l could afford the mortgage and upkeep on my own. Then when it's sold it would still be split 50/50.

waterSpider · 01/11/2019 12:27

His pension could easily be worth £50k, if a normal workplace pension (say 10% employer and 5% employee contribution). So could be worth more than the equity - less if a mean scheme, rather more if a generous one.

Original poster
Cantsleep22 · 01/11/2019 13:15

He is currently living with new partner so has a place to live long term. I was just curious as to how spousal maintenance works but guessing it’s not worth going for. I’ll look into pensions instead

OP posts:
Chimpfield · 01/11/2019 13:26

Try earning your own money...... just a thought

Solitaryradiator · 01/11/2019 13:32

There’s a LOT of bad advice on here. Please don’t take advice that will affect the rest of your and your children’s’ lives from random people on the internet. Read this first, it tells you everything you need to know about your financial options. And then get a decent solicitor.

www.judiciary.uk/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/fjc-sorting-out-financial-needs-april-16-final-revised-nov17.pdf

Ps
If you have given up your career to support his whilst raising children that is taken into account in any settlement or ongoing payment. A lot depends, as someone mentioned, on what you can earn going forward. However, no-one on here can give decent advice without understanding the full details of both your financials.

PPs 10 years is counted as a long marriage so ignore that

Original poster
Cantsleep22 · 01/11/2019 13:42

I do earn my own money! How rude! I work let time around the children! Obviously earnings have been affected because I can’t work full time!

We were together 10 years but only married for 2

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Solitaryradiator · 01/11/2019 13:46

Time cohabiting before marriage counts as long as there was no break in living together.

Read the document. It’s very comprehensive

PrettyPurse · 01/11/2019 18:05

Definitely look into pensions. On the financial form E that we had to fill in, it wanted information about future living arrangements so he will have to declare that he is co-habiting

My XH shat himself when he saw that part as they were also living together already and he thought her income would be used in the settlement. It isn't, but the fact they have 2 incomes to your one should be taken into consideration.

Does he have the children much? I immediately started EOW and half of all school holidays

Original poster
Cantsleep22 · 01/11/2019 19:00

We have had to fill out financial details for mediation but don’t think it was the form e as it didn’t ask for future living arrangements. He didn’t fill his in completely either so mediator sent his away to finish it. When will the form e be required? I have started divorce proceedings already

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