Missed the briefing. Anyone got an actual summary?

[BabyLlamaZen]

Including things that were implied, questions not answered, anything interesting?

All I can see is not to worry about food and ports. 🤷‍♀️

The transport minister bloody loves talking about his movable road barrier

Didn’t miss much

Don't panic buy, supply chains are robust, and he hopes schools can go back as planned in January, but it depends on the virus. Oh and haven' they done well to plan for Brexit, meaning that there are ready made places for all the stacked up lorries to go.

You did miss his hair though!

Blah, waffle, it’ll be fine by Easter.

Whose hair?!

Little snigger about Brexit. Livelihoods at stake, but it's a bit of a larf really.

Boris' hair looked like a dandelion clock with pomade on. It was weird.

Thank you @Rollingpiglet that’s exactly what I needed to hear! I couldn’t face watching him after Saturdays shit show.

@Rollingpiglet

Don't panic buy, supply chains are robust, and he hopes schools can go back as planned in January, but it depends on the virus. Oh and haven' they done well to plan for Brexit, meaning that there are ready made places for all the stacked up lorries to go.

Ah. Schools are doomed theN.

Yeah his hair was particularly astray today...there were lots of questions unanswered...and they don’t know about schools yet and are monitoring everything as they go...more places could end up in tier 4 yet according to Valance....they know this will spread and we need to get control of it. That was the gist.

It's Emmanuel Macron's birthday was the highlight I think

Yes, today is Macron's was the main thing I learnt from it.

Shapps said ' don't go to Kent' in case you were thinking of doing that.

I was so fascinated by the hair I didn’t really listen to what he was saying!

Boris Johnson is losing his hair.
I know that most men would go bald over all this, but the thought of a bald Boris is scary.

Bald boris? That really is fresh hell.

You got it all, OP. Waffle waffle alas, Emmanuels’ birthday, enough food, squash the sombrero, Rule Britannia, spaff

Boris’ hair was bizarre, it was mesmerising. Trying to work out what had happened. Maybe he’d washed it this morning and it was full of static?

Macron is celebrating his birthday today and Boris had a lovely chat with him.

He got in quite a few "alas"es

He had a fantastic conversation with Macron, but promised not to talk about Brexit.

Vallance just repeated new strain is more transmittable but not more fatal (as far as they can tell).

He totally understands how other countries have reacted

No need to panic cos most of our supply is "unaccompanied" and that can arrive as normal. I had to google this and it means containers and trailers left at docks for onward circulation by destination country rather than a person driving them from start to finish and spreading virus as they do so.

Not really anything headline making. Just watch this space - the Kent/France issue should come to an end.

Bullet points:-
BJ’s hair
Moveable barrier
Macrons birthday
Alas

This is great - I need an app called the Mumsnet news summary which does this for all the news at the moment.

I would like the headline for this article to be ‘“Blah, Waffle, It’ll be fine for Easter” says pomaded dandelion clock”

Thank you Ladies. I’m properly laughing into my CPAP here 😂😂😂😂

Laughter stretches those lungs 👍🏻

I did think of MN when I heard him say ‘alas’