Quick conception first baby but longer with the second-positive stories please!

[newtolineofduty]

Hi ladies, so I'm currently TTC baby number two after having my DD almost three years ago. We were so lucky to get pregnant straight away last time and whilst I was expecting it to take longer this time (I'm now 36) I'm starting to get a little anxious that something may be 'wrong' given that we got pregnant so quickly last time whereas this time we've been properly trying for four months with OPKs etc but had no luck.

I started my period today and I guess I just need to hear some positive stories to perk me up a bit to reassure me it doesn't necessarily mean there's anything wrong and that it can still take time for perfectly fertile people to get pregnant! I'm aware four months isn't long but we're only two months away from the advice to speak to a GP etc and the stats about two thirds of couples having got pregnant after three months etc have got me down! Sorry for my ramblings and thanks in advance for the positive energy! xxx

Bump xxx

Don't forget, it's always only a 33% chance. It can just take time but it must be even harder when it happened so quickly the first time around.

1st time = straight away
2nd time = after 4 months.

Sending love and strengths. TTC can be very stressful

I was 32 when I conceived dc1 straight away (we were on honeymoon ) . Then 35 when I conceived dc2 but that took 9 months of ttc. I hadn't heard about dtd when your vaginal mucus has the consistency of egg white if you want to conceive. When I got that nugget of info after 8 months of ttc I gave it a go, and conceived that time round.

1st time - first month
2nd baby - took 18 months with 3 miscarriages in that time. Rainbow baby is here and happy now.

Thank you @gemloving. I'm in no 'rush' to get pregnant or anything I guess I'm just worrying something is wrong now!

@NCfortoday2021 thank you for sharing and so sorry to hear about your losses but congratulations on your rainbow baby. I hope you don't mind me asking but did you ever find out whether there was a reason it was harder when trying for the second time? Xxx

I'm in the same boat, finding each period a little bitter!
1st time was literally first time we had dtd unprotected 😂
2nd: in tww on 3rd cycle

Get iron levels checked out.

Thanks @birdglasspen I've been treated for low iron before so I will do thank you.

@Nervousdave it feels like a lifetime doesn't it! Xx

@newtolineofduty

Hey! I think often when you’ve fell pregnant quickly it’s hard to not just assume it will happen again. But most likely you were just “lucky” that first time.

I fell pregnant straight away first time. But mc at 13 weeks.
An then took 7 cycles to do conceive my DD. Which came as a bit of a shock and felt forever at the time!

Now ttc #2 and stupidly thought it might be quick again. Nope 😂
Onto cycle 5…bloody stupid thing. None of it ever makes sense. Just have to go with the flow and trust it would work eventually 🤞🏼🤞🏼🥰

Thanks @Indianna2006 that feels really helpful. I think you're right and I've totally now realised we just got lucky the first time!

Sending love to you-TTC is really rubbish!!! X

Dc1 - first time
Dc2 - 9 months
3 - 3 months but miscarried
Dc3 - 3 months and in my third trimester now.
Good luck!

Also @Indianna2006 so sorry to hear about your loss x

Thank you @RavenclawsRoar. Sorry to hear about your loss but also congratulations on your pregnancy! It's interesting that your first and third/fourth pregnancies were quick but the second slightly longer! I think I need to accept that things can just be a little inconsistent and sometimes there's no 'reason'! X

The only contributer not to get personally name checked, oh the ignomy. 😭😉

@newtolineofduty there is definitely no rhyme or reason!

If your a fertile couple. Likelihood is you will be pregnant within 12 months/ 12 cycles. And that’s all you can go buy.

Until that point there is no point in worrying (easier said than done) as that is all within normal. Falling pregnant on cycle 11 still means your both perfectly normal and fertile. Just the odds of conception.

It’s hard though. I’m fed up after 4 cycles of nothing and hoping this 5th one is the one. But I suspect not 🤣🤣🤦🏻‍♀️ Lol xx

What will be will be xx

@Indianna2006 I'm 36 so I think I have it in my head that six months is the fertility/infertility 'cut off' and I'm obviously getting close to that. My partner conceived my 2DSC straight away with his ex too so I'm paranoid it's me!

Sorry @CleopatrasBeautifulNose how rude of me! I didn't keep track of who I'd name checked (new phrase for me!) x we've been doing it around EWCM time so I don't think that's the problem 😕 x

Don't panic! Easier said than done, I know. I had diagnosed myself with multiple fertility issues after two months.

First baby - literally had sex once, six days before I ovulated (I was using Natural Cycles, so I'm pretty confident of the ovulation date). Happy accident!
Second baby - 4 or 5 months

For #2, we used the SMEP method and I was taking agnus castus for a short luteal phase. I'm sure one of these made the difference!

@newtolineofduty yeh I totally get that. I think that’s cos they want ppl slightly older to get help earlier. Cos sometimes help can take a while etc.

But it’s normal for under 35 to take a year. So if you don’t conceive after 6 months at 36. Doesn’t mean your infertile at all. It’s bound to take slightly longer in general with age.

I know lots of 35-40s got pregnant to similiar time frames as all of my late 20s friends. So hopefully odds are still in your favour.

But of course after 6 months get ball rolling as you can. Bit hopefully you won’t need any of it anyway.

Lots of my friends in there late 20s took 9 months to conceive.

Hoping that won’t be me tho but 😂

@newtolineofduty I’m 31 but 32 in a couple of months. My DD is 3.5. So desperate to have another one after having a difficult recovery and not being able to ttc until now because of my health.

@Indianna2006 thank you for that reassurance. I know you're totally right. I think TTC is making me abit mental! 😂 x it doesn't help that ALL my friends/family all got pregnant straight away so that's my 'norm'. Are you trying to be chilled about it? X

@newtolineofduty it does make us a bit mental. It rips me over sometimes. Normally near testing and it’s negative and I know period is coming. I lose my shit for a few days 😂
But then once I’ve gotten my head around this month I’m okay.

Trying to be chilled. Doesn’t really work tho. I did opks last month just to check as I didn’t first 3 months. But it added up with when I was going off other symptoms so I don’t think I need to do them.

Just have sex when we want to but a little more over fertile week. An then don’t test until 12 dpo at least. That’s how I’m doing it. But it’s hard.

🤞🏼🤞🏼 Fingers crossed this cycle could be the lucky ones!

Yeh I have some friends pregnant first fo every shot. So so lucky. For most it isn’t like that tho. I only have one friend out of like 12 that got that lucky. Rest have taken from 2 months right to 2 years. But everyone has got there in the end. Majority within 9 months 🥰🥰

I feel the same.
Dd is 3.5 now, pregnant first month I stopped my pill, we literally dtd once that month.
We've been trying for dc2 5 months now and nothing, it does get you down. Hopefully it will happen soon for everyone trying 🙏

[quote newtolineofduty]@Indianna2006 I'm 36 so I think I have it in my head that six months is the fertility/infertility 'cut off' and I'm obviously getting close to that. My partner conceived my 2DSC straight away with his ex too so I'm paranoid it's me!

Sorry @CleopatrasBeautifulNose how rude of me! I didn't keep track of who I'd name checked (new phrase for me!) x we've been doing it around EWCM time so I don't think that's the problem 😕 x[/quote]
Oh, sorry to hear that, it would have been lovely to offer a magic bullet. Are you both fit and eating well?

With DC1 it took us 6 months TTC
This time round it's 12 months and counting 😭 I have really irregular cycles though so should probably try OPKs. Trying not to get too hung up or stressed about it but it is upsetting when you see so many people conceive quickly.