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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Thread 9. TTC#1 The thread where we unanimously delete Ovia.

909 replies

StarkyTheDirewolf · 30/01/2016 17:06

Symptom spotters, tww - ers, slightly hysterical hormone laden ladies! Regs, lurkers, intermittent posters! Our raison d'etre is 'am I pregnant?' Depending on how much Ovia (Whybird/Ovibitch) has pissed us off/messed with our fw she is either the oracle or a sanctimonious charlatan.

Just a warning, we move FAST! Our threads last on average, about a week before they're full.

Thread 9 , Welcome one and all! Group of weirdos, wee hoarders, covert opk or okp, depending on what your autocorrect decides addicts with a side business in CM management!

We do not judge, we enjoy TMI, we i encourage waiting to poas nobody listens and all the grossness you can find from a group of intelligent, articulate ladies. Fart stories make us laugh, stories about cervical mucus, pooing, cysts and nausea equally welcome.

Post your stats and add your dates. We have a register thanks to kat, I have been dubbed the resident piss stick queen loaaaaaads of bfp'ers who keep us positive! We don't have rules, we love a good symptom spot, we try to stay grounded and not be hysterical sometimes we manage it aswell

We like acronyms, we make some up: PET = Proper expensive test. We love the d(h)...which can of course mean 'dearest' or 'dickhead' why, what were you thinking?

Thread 9. TTC#1 The thread where we unanimously delete Ovia.
OP posts:
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ElleSarcasmo · 03/02/2016 08:19

Feefs the jaw problem sounds horrible Sad, do you have weird angled wisdom teeth? The last time I got mine xrayed (they are all weirdly cramped, pointing backwards and don't have room to come through properly) the dentist laughed and said hope you don't get an infection as nobody would want to try to take those out! Hope the splint helps things to settle down.

Pugmummy your OPK looks positive to me, is that the darkest it has been? I know some people got darker ones at the peak (that one looks about the same as control), but my darkest were like that, and I got temp drop so think I did ovulate. I would get on it just in case Wink

What is asmr? I am having difficulty getting to sleep at the moment (snap with the job Feefs Ni and Moggy, mat leave seems like the promised land!). Ni your attitude seems healthy, I need to learn to detach more.

FX you have inspired me to look for a yoga class, I totally need it! My flexibility is embarassing.

Kat hope the massage sorts your shoulder out.

Sorry about AF Miwel

ElleSarcasmo · 03/02/2016 08:21

Eudae they give you stats on the packet but they are not very accurate at 11dpo, if I recall correctly about 55% 5 days before your period is due, gradually increasing closer to AF date. So you're definitely not out. Do you have symptoms?

Pugmummy87 · 03/02/2016 08:38

Hi Elle yes it is. Although I had a peak solid smiley face on a clear blue digital opk Friday, whereas as a normal opk had a very faint line, so not sure what to think. Dtd anyway just in case!
We've had more sex over the past week than we do in a whole month lol. I'm hoping that means he's swimmers finally catch the bloody egg. Just hope my uterus isn't a bloody battlefield, feel bad for them after watching the great sperm race now!

Chocaholic88 · 03/02/2016 09:45

Hey ladies!

Sorry struggling to keep up with the thread atm! Fill me in? Any news from anyone?

eud it depends what your normal hcg level is, and what day you implant. If you were pregnant you may not have even implanted yet which means you may not get HCG in your urine for another 3 - 6 days!!

Eudaemonia · 03/02/2016 10:08

Elle I am completely symptom free. I just feel sort of normal. Last month I felt a bit sicky and then my period was a bit late but still bfn.

Pug mummy I would believe the clear blue smiley, I read a study that said they were the most reliable and my consultant recommended them. Also it sounds like you would be covered whenever it happened! I just have to pin my faith on the clear blue smiley face since I only get the one attempt a month.

Stark I think you made the right decision, there's no placenta that early so your little blastocyst wouldn't come to any harm if it is busy implanting away when you have your prosecco.

SuchaJem · 03/02/2016 10:10

starky “I swear he's got the libido of a 21 yr old! He's nearly 38 and would cheerfully go hell for leather at it twice a day! I shouldn't complain, I'm lucky in that respect I suppose!”

You are indeed a lucky girl. Second month in and I already feel like I am coercing my DH into it. He needs to up his game!

kat “I actually can't sleep without a podcast.”

I’m so glad there are other people like me. This is me.

Other fave listens for me are The Worst Idea of All Time – two Kiwi comedians watch and review the same film every week for a year. Off the wall, very funny.
Everything Adam Buxton – the interviews, the Adam & Joe Show. Very childish humour. And jingles. He writes a version of Like A G6 to a story about a lizard in a blizzard. It kills me.
Also enjoy Radiolab, Woman’s Hour (gets me all self-righteous), In Our Time, The Life Scientific, Desert Island Discs, My Dad Wrote A Porno (ridiculously funny) and Serial – although not enjoying the second series so much.

pug “We've had more sex over the past week than we do in a whole month lol”

This is where we are getting to. DH and I have been together for almost 10 years. We enjoy DTD but this feels like a return to the early days where all we did was DTD. It’s great, I feel a lot closer to him in fact. But it’s a lot of effort..

Mileymoocow · 03/02/2016 10:17

Wow! 1 evening off and we're on page 20!

Can someone summarise? scrolling is making me nauseous

Any testers today?????

iwillbemrsminty · 03/02/2016 11:13

Let me in please!

MrsM
34 y/o
TTC no.1
Cycle #1 after coming off pill on 13th Jan. Had withdrawal bleed now waiting for the real AF to arrive to determine cycle length. Formerly regular 28 days so hoping to return to that.

Love reading these threads Grin

FXSkip · 03/02/2016 11:20

starky thats amazing. I remember a few years ago OH was complaining that I wasn't up for it as much as him anymore, but this last 2 months I have had to initiate every single time, which concerns me as maybe we are subconciously TTC as a way to fix our relationship without knowing that's what we are doing. He said he's not in the mood as often because of work stress, him mum going through chemo and the cat waking us up all the time but then always seems up for it if I prance around in panties enough. I don't know if I'm completely over analysing the situation though, maybe we are fine and this is a normal concern?

FXSkip · 03/02/2016 11:21

Welcome MrsM please fee free to ignore my venting (that goes for everyone)

Snowdog37 · 03/02/2016 11:23

As of today's temp rise I'm now either 1dpo (Kindara) or 4dpo (FF) Not sure which one is actually accurate but I'll take either! Hooray!!!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

Jeeeeeeesus. That was a hairy couple of days thinking I'd actually broken myself. Looks like we dtd hopefully around the right times...

I fall asleep listening to music. Dh and my Favourite Sleepy Music is currently anything Pink Floyd. I like podcasts but never think to listen to them.

Now to start trying not to obsess.

SuchaJem · 03/02/2016 12:10

Hello mrsM

Fingers crossed for you snowdog

fxskip I initiate most of the time with DH too. I don’t think that means you are TTC to fix the rellie at all hon. All those things he said about stress, family illness and tiredness are completely libido killers. Have you talked to him about how you feel about this?

Just discovered EWCM when I nipped to the loo at work. Actually wondering if I can get DH to meet me at lunch for a quickie. Where though?!

iwillbemrsminty · 03/02/2016 12:32

Thanks Such and FX, lovely to meet you ladies Flowers Hoping I can join in with your stories soon when I have had my AF and Opia starts being more helpful as at the moment, she is just guessing! I'm mindful of the fact that I am 35 in July and DP in March and we need to get a move on!

StarkyTheDirewolf · 03/02/2016 13:10

Welcome mrsminty !!

Coffee, shoe polish, teabags, sugar lumps, (ignore me, I need to commit this to paper before I forget when I'm out shopping!)

Eudaemonia frers have a sensetivity of 10 iu (most other tests are 20-25, the digis are 50) so are more likely to pick up earlier the hcg in your system if it's there...

However, you may not have produced enough to create a reaction of two lines, you may have only just implanted, (hcg is only produced after implantation, and then it will take a few days to cause a reaction, even if you had an implantation bleed, which are rare, only 30% of women have them) or of course, the most rubbish reason, you're not pregnant this cycle.

At 10/11 dpo it could go either way, but there's very little point doing expensive tests before af is due, for the most part it's just a massive waste of a test and money. Ic's can claim to be as sensitive as frers, it's not true, they are unreliable. Some are, some aren't, and of course, you'd never know if you had a good batch or a bad batch. But are definitely better for your wallet if it's just that you need to wee on something. I'm the same with opks It also depends on how long your cycle is. Mine can be up to 10 days "late" without actually being late. But assuming you're tracking your ovulation, 14/15 dpo is the best time to get an accurate test (with an expensive frer anyway)

Some people (like our choc ) don't produce enough of the hcg to register on a test even weeks into a pregnancy, but thats incredibly rare (she's special is our choc ).
www.countdowntopregnancy.com/tools/pregnancy_test_calculator.php this is a good calculator, it gives you a solid look at when's best to test including percentages.

Sorry if that felt like a lecture! We've had so much good luck and positivity on our thread, but I feel like we also have to be quite mindful of it not taking over our lives. Which it's so easy to do.

So, for me personally, I've had to be realistic and honest, especially on here. It's SUCH an emotional journey, and I decided last month on cycle 1 that I wouldn't test, partly because it's a waste of money, but also because if I start testing, ill get obsessed with it, and I've seen so many of the girls on here test for a week before af was due, wonder and have evaps that may be positives, then have af arrive and feel like they've wasted a fortune and are so disappointed.

I've got to keep my feet on the ground, because if I think I'm pregnant every cycle and tested, and then I'm not, then I'd be more disappointed than if I just waited and af arrived. Don't know if that makes sense but thats my logic working! I have an irregular cycle and I don't ovulate every month don't think my right side works so the odds are not in my favour! So I have to be very realistic about my chances. And I'm only on cycle 2! But the wonders of having a cycle mean, every time is a new go! Which is pleasing! In summary, waiting is better but if you can't, ic's are the way to go. 😃🐘🍰

OP posts:
Pugmummy87 · 03/02/2016 13:42

Starky you are the pissy stick Oracle.

I am also holding out until AF is due which is the 17th. I figure if I did ovulate Saturday then that will take me to 17dpo and it's either gonna be a clear bfp or bfn. If I only ovulated yesterday or today, that will make me 14dpo and again hopefully would be an obvious bfp or bfn on the 17th.
We will see, it's out of my hands and down to luck now, done our best (might squeeze in one more dtd today and then let poor DH have a few days rest!).

Such When DH and I first got together we were at it like rabbits. Then life sort of gets in the way and it had become less frequent. Which never bothered me that much as the sex we do gave is very good and we are quite a loving couple in other ways.
DH 's libido is affected by his anxiety disorder , which has actually improved over the last couple of months since cutting out carbonated drinks and cutting down on caffeine, he has his first cbt session next week, so I'm hoping that less anxiety will improve libido more. He certainly hasn't complained this week anyway. ☺

Planeteer · 03/02/2016 13:57

Starky am sending a large number of baked goods and a big thumbs up for that last post. You are totally right, and it's a huge help having you here to occasionally bring sanity back into the mix! Thank you, you are a Star

SuchaJem · 03/02/2016 14:06

starky sugar lumps?

pug “When DH and I first got together we were at it like rabbits. Then life sort of gets in the way and it had become less frequent. Which never bothered me that much as the sex we do gave is very good and we are quite a loving couple in other ways.
DH 's libido is affected by his anxiety disorder , which has actually improved over the last couple of months since cutting out carbonated drinks and cutting down on caffeine, he has his first cbt session next week, so I'm hoping that less anxiety will improve libido more. He certainly hasn't complained this week anyway.“

This sounds very familiar! Ditto on having less but good sex.

I hope the CBT helps your DH. I’ve been through a few rounds of it for panic and anxiety, and found it extremely helpful. A more sustained and longer term help than anti-depressants too, which I’ve now finally weaned off for TTCing 

SuchaJem · 03/02/2016 14:06

I meant to add to the less but good sex bit - until now! Grin

ElleSarcasmo · 03/02/2016 14:26

Pugmummy good work! I would be more inclined to trust the smiley face Smile

Eudae as annoying as the 2ww is, I think you just have to sit it out, unfortunately and wait until AF due. Starky said it better than me!

Skip, I agree with Jem, having to initiate it doesn't mean you should be worried about the relationship. It always slows down in a long relationship and goes in peaks and troughs, our sex life has definitely suffered when I've been stressed and it sounds like your DH is? I finally made DH watch the great sperm race (thanks whoever posted it), so hope it's clearer that we really do need to do it on those exact days -we are weekenders for preference Wink

Glad you had the temp drop Snow! Sounds like you have put in a good effort this month!

Eudaemonia · 03/02/2016 14:32

Thanks Stark! That countdowntopregnancy website looks good. I like the calculator- makes it all nice and clear. I know I should wait. It's so hard not obsessing over it though!

The most difficult thing for me is knowing that each new cycle is a very expensive new opportunity. There are only going to be a few more of them because I am having donor IUI so even though success rates are very similar to just trying for a baby normally I will be encouraged down the IVF route after only 6 goes. Of course the expense makes it very easy for me to justify splashing out the cash for pregnancy tests but all it does is make me more stressed I think.

I sometimes feel quite envious of people who have ready access to sperm, it feels like a lot of pressure to know that I don't get many attempts and for all I know the timing might be off because I ovulate earlier/later after the LH surge than usual. On the other hand it sounds like feeling like you have to DTD at the right time is pretty unpleasant for a lot of people so at least I avoid that bit.

Snowdog37 · 03/02/2016 15:16

It's tough even with sex on tap, I've found. If you're busy with work and family and life in general, combining that with knowing you have to dtd within a certain window, it's stressful. I love my dh and I really enjoy our sex life but even ttc doesn't stop me sometimes feeling like I'd rather just have an early night! My aim is to dtd at least 2-3 times between 0-3 and 0+1 that way hopefully there will be some swimmers where they need to be. And hopefully dh won't be so worn out lol he can enjoy some none ttc sex too so he doesn't feel like I just want him for his goods.

StarkyTheDirewolf · 03/02/2016 15:17

pug I've got an generalised anxiety disorder (which, when I'm struggling, develops into ocd tendency) I have found cbt a MASSIVE help. I've just completed an 8 week course, and my life has brightened tenfold. Anxiety is one of those things which I think hit most people at some point in their life. I never believed cbt could work, but it does. If only because it's an unbiased outside person to talk to. Small steps and easy goals make life more manageable. I would heartily recommend it to your Dh. It takes a while on the nhs but it is so worth it. And I think waiting till the 17th is a fantastic plan.

planeteer I feel awful sometimes when I come on and I'm all "calm down dear" but, I honestly believe it's better to wait and see with testing. Our bodies play tricks, pms symptoms and pregnancy symptoms are so similar it's virtually impossible to call. And I don't think getting worked up about it helps, it can be a hinderence, because our bodies feel the stress and clamp up!

jem if we have sugar, like proper sugar, when my Dh makes me a cup of tea I'm lucky if I don't go into some kind of diabetic shock I'm not diabetic because he puts in so much! Where's with lumps, it's easier, as he can count to two! Grin

OP posts:
StarkyTheDirewolf · 03/02/2016 15:21

Eudaemonia the waiting is expletive horrible! And especially in your position I think the stress and worry is tenfold, because each cycle means so much. Forgive me, I don't have a lot of knowledge on donor iui and ivf. Flowers

OP posts:
Pugmummy87 · 03/02/2016 15:41

Thanks Stark
I will let him know that, I think he is a bit dubious that it will help, but it got really bad during the summer and that's when he went back to the gp and asked for a referral to mental health services as the medication just didn't seem to be cutting it. He saw a specialist back in October who recommended cbt and also suggested the cutting out carbonated drinks etc.
He's struggled all he's life with it, plus a ? Autistic spectrum disorder , which he finally got a diagnosis of high functioning autism several weeks ago. So I'm hoping he will benefit from it all round.

I'm sorry but I have to share this rather cute picture of my pug Frank who turned 1 yesterday.(hence my username) I made him a cake too lol. Most definitely a crazy Pug lady.

Thread 9. TTC#1 The thread where we unanimously delete Ovia.
FXSkip · 03/02/2016 15:51

Thank you everyone - Starky, elle, jem and any I've missed, for your honest responses. Its another 'competitive bullshit' thing I think - other women I know talk about how their husbands 'constantly pester them for sex' and how they 'cant get enough' but I wonder if they mean that because they never initiate? If I didn't, we'd dtd once a week - BUT OH wont do it if he's playing rugby (he thinks Game Balls are a thing) and I don't like it if we are hungover so that can often rule out entire weekends.

Anyway, I have taken Starky's advice and decided that, although Ovia is predicting AF on the 8th Feb (and therefore testing then) I am going to wait until AF shows up, or test on 20th Feb as this will be in line with my previous 39 day cycle. So, Kat please change my testing date to 20th Feb? Thanks muchly Smile