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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

New cycle of TTC - what are you doing differently?

100 replies

MrsMcJnr · 02/12/2006 12:15

Hello, I know it has been done so many times before but when I get to cd1 (yet again) I find it helps to think about what I've tried before that didn't work, what helped me cope and what I have yet to try so here's my list:

STOP
-OPKs (they just stress me out)
-Checking CP (don't think it's worth it)
-Focusing on fertile week only (OV happened early this cycle and caught me off guard)
-Putting too much pressure on both DH and I (we always have huge rows just before OV because I don't think we are BDing enough!)

KEEP
-Charting temps & CM
-Taking B6 (helped with PMS & maybe LP as it's been extended by 1 or 2 days last 2 cycles)
-Taking pre-natal vits
-Taking Royal Jelly (overall well being)
-Drinking grapefruit juice
-Using saliva scope (didn't work last cycle but that was the first one of using it)
-Trying to stay calm and relax

START
-watching diet and drinking less
-consider acupuncture/reflexology
-re-read books

How about the rest of you?

OP posts:
ImpatientElf · 07/12/2006 16:39

Hello there Greedy. Sorry to hear about the bfn. How many DPO are you? The high temp is still promising. Ignore the spotting, you could get that whether you were pg or pre-af!

I know what you mean about MN consumption. I think there's a delicate balance between getting the support you need (from dry info to a damned good laugh, and even a bit of abuse!) and getting even more obsessed with ttc. Hopefully my alarming workload will help me maintain that balance a bit more in the next week or so...

I shall take your advice and implement it tonight! (CD6, confused, broken record? I'm hoping MrsMc is right about that ov fairy!) I shall play my little swimmers some loving music on the way home, and I shall introduce them to my lovely house, dp and ds (well, perhaps not) and tell them that their spirit is here to stay. And we shall seal that relationship in the calm of my lovely bed. It sounds almost romantic. Think you're obsessed? Here am I embarking on a love affair with a small pot!

MrsMcClaus · 07/12/2006 16:41

Greedy - I've seen your chart and it is not a ridiculous hope at all, hang in there! The site is addictive, I have to admit that and I love talking to you all a bit too much but I don't think it makes things worse for me on the TTC front. I would hate it if I were going through all this without friends to talk to, albeit that I don't really know any of you, I feel like I do and it makes me feel better.

RudolphsREADY · 07/12/2006 16:44

Can I just say (did I just say that I shouldn't say what I think all the time??) that I love greedy's idea for a more relaxing insemination. I think it's wonderful! I really think that it will make the whole thing a little more relaxed and dare I say more romantic!! And without being too personal, it could involve your dp more which has only got to be a good thing huh?? Conceived the baby together, in a way??????

Sorry if I have overstepped the mark, once again with my speaking my mind

MrsMcClaus · 07/12/2006 16:45

PMSL very loudly ImpatientElf - It's a bit like a sequel to the "The Man with Two Brains", "The Lady with the Small Pot" - bet the change in environment makes all the difference this cycle!

ImpatientElf · 07/12/2006 16:46

Annoyingly, when we got an organic f&v box a lot of it came from very far away places. Poison ourselves or poison the planet..? We now buy local from an indep grocer, despite the fact a lot of it's not organic. I'd like to find organic and local. Perhaps I need an allotment. Yeah right, in what spare time?!!

ImpatientElf · 07/12/2006 16:48

From one organic box to another...?!

YES, I agree, Greedy's insemination plan sounds great!

MrsMcClaus · 07/12/2006 16:49

mine's from a long way away though, I was born in the Far East ...aahhhh must do SOME work! [scared face remembering hand over of job tomorrow]

RudolphsREADY · 07/12/2006 16:55

at all the food miles from your f&V scheme Impatience. shame on them!! the company we use allows us to pick items individually with a min spend of £15 but they don't just do f&v, they do meat and bread and cheese and cereals and all sorts of things. I love them Organic is not the be all and end all, it's the balance (here she goes - RUN!) if it is locally produced and you know it's a small holding or a small farm, you can find out what (if any) pesticides have been used. It's more the huge companies with the pumped up tasteless pesticide covered ecosystem destroying yields that bother me.

greedyformincepies · 07/12/2006 16:56

cant keep up with switching threads! but i feel (slightly) better already and its down to you this time perve! PMSL at you introducing your little pot of swimmers to your dp and ds! even giggling typing it! THANKS! you cheered me up!

XmassyCharlotte · 07/12/2006 16:56

ImpatientElf... not sure where you are but I used to use FarmAround , which was (from memory) composed entirely of local, seasonal produce. I have also tried Abel & Cole, but find them a bit too corporate these days. I'm not sure how local all their food is, either. I used to live near a Fresh & Wild, and was horrified how much of their organic produce came from far away climes. Even when the same produce was very much in season over here!!

ImpatientElf · 07/12/2006 17:00

Off I go - wish me luck girls!

ImpatientElf · 07/12/2006 17:02

X and RR, I agree with all you say!

Greedy: Pleased to be of service .

XmassyCharlotte · 07/12/2006 17:11

Good Luck IE!!!

XmassyCharlotte · 07/12/2006 17:18

MrsMc - re. reflexology/etc - hmm, I'm a tad cynical on these matters. I'm not that keen on reiki as I can't help but wonder if they're actually doing anything! I catch myself having a crafty look through one of my closed eyes, half expecting to see the therapist on the other side of the room sat with their feet up sending a text message to someone!!

I have had reflexology before, but not for years. Went to a great place in Chelsea today (bit far from Scotland though!!), and it was very relaxing but with the added bonus of a bit of pain to make you think that it's having some sort of effect. I enjoyed the chat with the therapist both before and after and felt as though, if I went regularly, I would be able to develop a good relationship with her and be able to open up about the whole TTC business. Having said that, I did mention that that was why I was there and she gave me a bit of a talk afterwards about where she thought I needed to make changes in order to encourage things 'down there' working more effectively.

Who knows about all this stuff eh..? It's hard to know what's good and what isn't - I guess all I know is that I don't do enough on the spiritual/relaxation front and that it's probably something I need to focus on regardless. It certainly can't do any harm.

And yes, it does look as though we're cycle buddies! I shall certainly be willing you a BFP birthday pressie!!

XmassyCharlotte · 07/12/2006 17:59

Oh no it's me again!

I've just checked my saliva ferning thingie, which I used this morning but didn't clean. I waited the 15-20 mins this morning and saw nothing... looked again just now and there was a huge patch of very distinct ferning!

So I'm wondering MrsMc whether it just takes longer to dry than the instructions say, and whether that might be why you didn't see any ferning last cycle? Also wondering whether the ferning is accurate, seeing as I had left it all day?? Does anyone know?

I just checked online and it does say that ferning starts 3-4 days before ovulation, so maybe even though I'm only CD6 it might be heralding an early OV?

Ack, I'm confused already - might have to start reaching for my own sexy underwear!!

MrsMcClaus · 08/12/2006 10:00

Rudolph?sReady ? the box scheme I?m looking at is a local farm nearby so hopefully the stuff should come from there.

ImpatientElf ? hope last night was a better experience. I am starting to get that panicky feeling I get after AF ends and I think I should be starting to BD, even trickier this month as DH and I are not even able to sleep together. Suppose I?d better shave my legs etc and try and entice the wounded soldier! .

XmassyCharlotte ? I know what you mean about the reiki and you made me giggle at the thought of her on the other side of the room! I actually had quite a weird reiki experience last cycle. I went on CD13. Just before that, I think I might have had a chemical pregnancy; some really odd things were going on and on cd23 of that cycle when I was 5dpo I started getting really bad IBS pains and symptoms. I have not suffered for 5 years and they were really quite severe. They lasted for a couple of days and then seemed to subside again. I didn?t think anymore about it until after the reiki. I found the experience really relaxing and that is definitely something I need to do more of. I was in that semi conscious state where I knew what was going on but only just and all the time I was visualizing my uterus and willing a baby to grow there (the things we do!). Half way through, I gave an involuntary gasp and felt my breathing change. After the treatment, she asked if I had digestive problems and I explained what had happened the cycle before. She said she was getting a lot of heat from that area. I felt great afterwards, really chilled out, no pains anywhere. Got home & TMI alert ? went to the loo and was greeted with blood in addition to perfectly normal bowel movements. I was really freaked out and thought if it happened again next time I went, I?d go to the Dr but it never did and since then, I?ve been fine and probably more regular. So, I don?t know what that means and I am going back to the same therapist for reflexology on 22/12 so I?ll let you know what she days! Odd hey!

I felt a rapport with the therapist, I told her my TTC concerns and she had been there herself and understood what I was going through, she has two kids now. She recommended couples reflexology for TTC but DH is not really ready to do anything like that at the mo. Would be really interested to hear what changes yours thought you should make. I also agree that anything that helps the mind relax has got to be a good thing.

I am very of your ferns! I think the biggest thing for me is finding the right time to use it, I seem to always be eating or drinking and that obscures the reading doesn?t it? I think you do have to leave it longer than 10 mins, it?s just not dry in 10 is it? I tried yesterday. No ferns but I was only cd5 and still had spotting from AF. Believe me, I was licking it and checking it all the time last cycle and got very annoyed!

Interestingly, I read last night in my Zita West book that you can id your fertile time by taking your shortest cycle in the last 6 and subtracting 20 to get your first fertile day and your longest cycle minus 10 to give you your last fertile day. For me that would be cd7 ? 21. The later figure is probably not right for me as I had one freak 31 day cycle (which I think was the chemical month). Interesting though.

Are your CM and temp backing up the ferns do you think? Better get ready for the marathon I reckon .

Ladies, checked last night, Zita West says:

  1. She thinks it?s better for women to use pads rather than tampons. Tampons can be very drying and absorb normal moisture too. If you do use them, use organic non bleached cotton ones for heavy days only, use pads for light bleeds.
  2. Research shows a 70% increase in sensitivity to toxins, alcohol and smoke between 11.30am & 7pm day before OV. In the 5 days prior to OV a good diet and as few toxins as possible ate particularly important for achieving pregnancy.
XmassyCharlotte · 08/12/2006 10:30

That reiki experience sounds fab MrsMc - I've not really had an experience like that. I 'awww'ed' at thinking of you visualising a baby growing inside you... I would imagine that's a very powerful visualisation to do!! I know I need to relax more, and let my mind wander off into areas I don't normally frequent! Interesting to hear that your therapist recommends couple reflexology... my dp is very keen to go along too. Contrary to type, my OH LOVES reiki and is generally much more interested in these therapies than myself. He is a Type I diabetic, which (amongst other things) means he has to take good care of his feet, so he was very interested to hear about my experience yesterday.

Re. the ferning - don't be !! I really don't think it can have been a 'clean' reading. I did one as soon as I got up today (just about the only time of the day when I haven't been guzzling some sort of food or drink!) and have waited over an hour and still nothing but little dots.

This is my first month of charting, so it's all pretty new to me, and I was delighted to see EVERYTHING change on my chart as soon as I entered the 'some ferning' data. Plinkety plonk! Suddenly things got exciting on there. However, temps are low and no CM, so I really think it might have been a dud reading. (Have uploaded my chart on the charts thread.)

Still on that subject though, I really do think it takes longer than it says for the saliva to dry and give accurate results. From now on, I think I'll do the test when I get up in the morning and read it later on in the morning.

On the alcohol front - I use a weight loss website to track what I eat & drink at the moment, and I saw on there yesterday that ONE average bottle of:

14.5% red wine = 10.7 units alcohol = 600 cals
champagne = 9.3 units = 570 cals
dry white wine = 8.5 units = 495 cals

MrsMcClaus · 08/12/2006 10:36

Got to do my handover notes, getting critical but I'll be back to chat to you later. I've had a look at your chart, you are one hot lady! Looks good though. Have you had a peak at mine? I have had the same temp for 4 days now. Had to double check the therm this morning to make sure it is working, it is! I used to have alcohol on my chart too, think I'll add it in again. I am meant to be doing Scottish Slimmers but I am a terrible cheat, maybe we can help each other? I'd really like to lose a stone if not a bit more, lost 1/2 pound this week.

XmassyCharlotte · 08/12/2006 10:55

Yes, let's chat more later - I must... drag... myself... away... from.... MumsNet.

Confession though - my temps are higher than you'd expect because * TMI warning * I decided to take my temp vaginally rather than orally. I know you advised just to take one temp, but orally I was getting SUCH varying results (up to 0.5 degree C difference one after the other!) that I thought my chart would be useless. So after a bit of experimenting, I found that my temps were more consistent taken that way. According to TCOYF, internal temps are ~0.5 degree higher than oral temps.

So although yes, I am one hot lady... there is an explanation!!!

MrsMcClaus · 08/12/2006 15:07

your secret's safe with me!

greedyformincepies · 08/12/2006 21:53

oh xmassy! thats funny! you should get a bigger, vibrating thermometer and make it more fun1!!!

XmassyCharlotte · 09/12/2006 17:24

LOL @ Greedy!! A woman after my own heart....

I shall see how I get on with doing it "that way"... and MrsMc - one of the benefits of taking the temp that way is that the beeps can't really be heard under the duvet! So dp doesn't get as annoyed.

I am also trying to lose weight, and use weightlossresources.co.uk to do so (which I LOVE). Funnily enough, I've been rubbish at the whole thing ever since discovering MN - it's almost like I've displaced one web obsession with another. I do need to get back on the wagon with it though, and would also like to lose about one to one and a half stone. For me exercise is the key - it makes me feel so much better, and shoehorns me into eating better too. Cutting down on the drinking would also be a good thing. I went out last night for a night that I knew would be excessive, and I think (we worked out this morning) consumed the equivalent of 2 bottles of wine each over a long and languid dinner!! Eeek.

I have looked at your chart, but being a bit of a chart virgin I'm not too sure what to be looking for!! Maybe as the days go on it gets more 'interpretable'... as OV approaches, I would imagine.

Hope everyone's having a lovely weekend, or as lovely a weekend as possible if AF has just arrived.

MrsMcClaus · 09/12/2006 17:32

SO naughty you two!! That said, I am actually feeling that wonderful feeling of being horney with no TTC strings attached (cd7) Shame DH has no inclination at all .

I know exactly what you mean about swopping one site for another, I'm guilty too. Never been on that site though so will have a look. I'm the same about exercise, I must do more. Also, drinking wise, 2 bottles is just so easy to do in an evening isn't it!? .

Enjoy your weekend.

XmassyCharlotte · 09/12/2006 17:36

Thanks MrsMc - you too! Know what you mean about feeling horny (CD8) without the TTC thing, although in my case dp is actually away at the moment - we shan't be in the same room together for another 3 days so there'd better not be an early OV!

On the dieting front, maybe we should all help each other along with it... wasn't there an old thread about losing weight? xx

MrsMcClaus · 09/12/2006 19:37

Hello! Yes there was, Coggy and Natty (who is coming back soon ) were great at keeping us going! I shall bump it up!

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