Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Christmas

From present ideas to party food, find all your Christmas inspiration here.

Janet and Roy round-robin letters 2023

49 replies

GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 20/11/2023 14:10

Anyone in?

I'm more than willing to send (postmarked Oxfordshire).

As per last year (a few name changes ago) :

I promise to incorporate familial humblebrags, Jeff from Probus Club, plentiful and inappropriate oversharing re Janet's bowel resection op, amusing anecdote about Chairman Meow (their disdainful tabby cat), and a paragraph on Roy's nascent Civil War re-enactment hobby...

All written in a relentlessly upbeat manner, punctuated with many exclamation marks --> !!!

Except for Roy's 2 sentences on local parish council politics, which strike a sombre tone.
😀

OP posts:
Timeforallthecheese · 20/11/2023 20:31

Yes please. I’m in. I can do one from Edinburgh!

SanFranciscoCalling · 20/11/2023 20:34

I'm in from the south coast!

GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 20/11/2023 20:56

SanFranciscoCalling · 20/11/2023 20:34

I'm in from the south coast!

South coast, San Francisco?!!

OP posts:
GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 20/11/2023 21:01

@Timeforallthecheese
Edinburgh would be great, actually, as recipient I have in mind has spent time up there for weddings and work. So Janet could allude to meeting her there and she'll be none the wiser!
I'll PM you a few details tomorrow. Thanks. 😉

OP posts:
SnowflakeSparkles · 20/11/2023 21:05

This is so cute. Whenever I see these threads pop up I genuinely think the OG card could have been from my mum and dad (Janet and Roy)!

Tequilamockinbird · 20/11/2023 21:30

I've always wanted to receive one of these but not sure I'm creative (or witty) enough to send one. Do we have to send as well as receive?

GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 20/11/2023 21:32

@Tequilamockinbird
Nope, no obligation to do both.

OP posts:
GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 24/11/2023 06:42

@Timeforallthecheese I've sent you a PM 🙂

Anyone who'd like one from Oxford, please do feel free to PM me. No need to reciprocate, as @Timeforallthecheese has kindly offered to mail mine.

OP posts:
Turtleoo · 24/11/2023 08:03

GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 24/11/2023 06:42

@Timeforallthecheese I've sent you a PM 🙂

Anyone who'd like one from Oxford, please do feel free to PM me. No need to reciprocate, as @Timeforallthecheese has kindly offered to mail mine.

I would love one from Oxford please! Will pm you shortly.

Love this idea and happy to offer one from Herts to pay it forward

GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 24/11/2023 08:23

@Turtleoo I've sent you a PM reply. Let the fun begin 😁

OP posts:
Custardcreamandcoffee · 24/11/2023 08:24

I'd absolutely love one please if someone wouldn't mind.

Cheepcheepcheep · 24/11/2023 08:25

Oh NOW it feels like Christmas! 😁

GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 24/11/2023 08:29

Cheepcheepcheep · 24/11/2023 08:25

Oh NOW it feels like Christmas! 😁

🌲🎁😉

OP posts:
Turtleoo · 24/11/2023 09:14

Custardcreamandcoffee · 24/11/2023 08:24

I'd absolutely love one please if someone wouldn't mind.

Happy to volunteer if one from Herts would be any good? Pm me if so

GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 24/11/2023 18:44

In case any newcomers are looking for some inspiration, here are some J&Rs from past years.

Please don't be put off from writing one because you're concerned it has to be long/funny/detailed etc. etc., though.

The beauty of the concept is that it's totally up to what the requester and writer agree upon together. Depending on the recipient(s), it's actually sometimes more effective to do a purposely banal couple of short paragraphs. Truer to life?

Great examples here:

[from @jocktamsonsbairn]

"Waahaha! Found mine from 2014!!! 😂 it was written to someone in Canada with poster's specifications!

"To all our dear family and friends.

"Well, it's that time of year again, and can you believe it's been 12 whole months since we last shared our annual news with you all?! 2014 certainly has been an eventful year 'chez nous' - we survived the referendum, Roy's retirement and the Commonwealth Games with our usual stoical approach - you may have caught Roy on TV during the referendum campaign - he was even interviewed by a journalist eager for his opinion!

"Colin and Morag produced a very healthy sprogette early March, finally making us grandparents!

"Verity-Jayne is just delightful and is already walking, talking and showing an avid interest in reading!
She particularly loves poring over Roy's Daily Mail and is the image of Janet - although she does have Roy's chin! Such a poppet! Morag managed an all natural birth (with us vigilant grandparents sitting in the waiting room with our flask and picnic!) and coped superbly with Colin's expert support and guidance . He really is a hands on father and helps Morag with everything - even the nappy changes! Although we are sure Verity-Jayne will soon be potty trained, she is such a clever girl!

"Son and daughter in law #2 are busy house hunting and have seen several rather cute 5 bedroom detached new builds already, although Roy does remind them that older houses have Christmas Tree Windows!

"Alistair is performing marvellously in his new highly promoted role but has asked us not to brag so I will say no more! He is pleased that last year's 'situation' is long forgotten and he and Moira are forging ahead with their house hunting!

"Roy has been very busy this year, as well as his duties of Chairman of the Burns Society and President of the Rotary, he has also been elected as Captain of the Golf Club - they were just waiting for him to retire!

"So, we are now in even more demand socially as you can imagine and Janet has been busy shopping for a range of formal and informal dresses in local and far flung boutiques - even managing to procure a new DJ for Roy! Sweeping changes will now be able to be made at the GC - starting with the function suite curtains!

"The new showpiece Coachman Laser caravan has been turning heads on several outings, and fellow campers at Thurston Manor Leisure Park were positively drooling when Roy drove it slowly around the site on its virgin voyage before parking up! Janet has been busy crocheting cushion covers to give it an even more homely feel and has made Cath Kidston-esque bunting!

"We are expecting the photographs of our interior will appear on the Camping and Caravanning Club website shortly so look out for them - we are now very valued platinum members!

"We have now perfected the 'rustic' camping with only a few altercations with local farmers who seem unable to comprehend public rights of way! In fact, this also included a few security guards when we parked up at Gleneagles for the Ryder Cup! Janet was roasting partridge and Roy was busy setting up the new luxury picnic dining set when they all appeared with the local constabulary - what a hoot!

"Good thing Roy was on hand to pass on a few tips to those young European golfers who don't have the benefit of his years of experience - and haven't yet been promoted to captain of their own club!

"Janet has been busy exploring the mysterious world of online auctions and has secured many precious artefacts for mere pennies - ebay for those of you who are interested! Oh how we laughed though when the 'Commodore's Chair' arrived! It had clearly suffered from the seller's poor spelling as it was in fact a commode! Quick thinking Roy however managed to sell it to our elderly neighbour - even turning a quick profit in the process!

"Janet has been very busy with the church flower arranging and it has been suggested on numerous occasions that she enter a national competition as her skill with cut blooms is second to none! The prizes from those will soon be joining those she has been busy winning at local and national events with her legendary lemon drizzle cake.
(Sorry folks, please stop the begging letters, you know the recipe is a closely guarded secret - even Waitrose and Marks and Sparks are desperate to get their hands on it!)

"However, with Moira and Alistair now contemplating vegetarianism, Janet has perfected an outstanding spiced nut loaf and the recipe for that is enclosed - please enjoy and think of us as you bake!

"With the new luxury Coachman Laser, we are planning the "Great Janet and Roy UK tour 2015" - a detailed itinerary is currently being meticulously planned in the study, and Douglas has already managed to find us a local company happy to make 'tour t-shirts' as apparently that is the done thing these days!

"We do hope to catch up with you on our tour sometime next year as we are basing our travels on our 'Christmas Card Address Book' to try and catch as many family and friends as possible!

"Have a wonderful Christmas and a very 'merry' Hogmanay (hic)!
Best wishes to you and yours,
Janet and Roy xxx"

[from @sleighedd]

"Dear xx, we were so so happy to hear your son xx had a baby this year with y we're in the area because Roy is having his annual colonoscopy, isn't that fantastic timing!! Can't wait to see you all , don't worry about putting us up with Roy's redundancy money we bought a magnificent Winnebago and we'll just park it on your drive! We saw it had been done recently, what a fantastic way to christen it!

"Looking forward to seeing you all (please get the nice loo roll in for Roy and his colonoscopy prep)

"Janet and Roy".

OP posts:
gettingolderbutcooler · 24/11/2023 18:48

Me too! Surrey! They'll laugh their pants off during what is a difficult time. ♥️

gettingolderbutcooler · 24/11/2023 18:49

How do I pm you?

TheChosenTwo · 24/11/2023 18:53

I will never forget the brilliant CatThiefKeith who did my mums one years ago, it was absolutely fantastic, I never let on to my mum that it was a prank. So well written, had me in stitches.
I always think of the much missed CatThief when these roll around each year.

Dymaxion · 24/11/2023 19:32

I would love one, happy to do one in return. How do you go about it ?

GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 24/11/2023 20:04

@gettingolderbutcooler I've sent you a reply PM now 😉

OP posts:
GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 24/11/2023 21:18

@Dymaxion

If everyone's posts can please include their (general) location they'll mail from and/or the (general) location of their recipients, we can hopefully match willing J&R writers to J&R requesters.

e.g. "Eastbourne, happy to mail two. Can anyone do me one from Gloucester/Cheltenham area?"

Some people like to write for multiple people, others a one-off. Either is fine!

No requester is obliged to write one at all. But, in the spirit of paying it forward, it'd be nice if you can where possible.

Communicate privately via PM, but flag up successful matches on this thread so we can keep a rough tally/do shout-outs for any particular locations etc.

Last but not least, consider your choice of recipient carefully!
The aim of J&R is to spread some mischievous, lighthearted fun not upset anyone.

.

OP posts:
GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 24/11/2023 21:24

TheChosenTwo · 24/11/2023 18:53

I will never forget the brilliant CatThiefKeith who did my mums one years ago, it was absolutely fantastic, I never let on to my mum that it was a prank. So well written, had me in stitches.
I always think of the much missed CatThief when these roll around each year.

Is CatThiefKeith no longer on MN?

OP posts:
Sharpkat · 24/11/2023 21:36

I am in North Yorkshire (York). Very happy to send one. Have recipients in North Yorkshire as well.

I once sent one to my best friend. She came round for lunch the day she received it and was raging as she had no idea who it was from and called her parents to see if they knew. I remember trying to bury my head in the oven as I was laughing so hard Grin

jocktamsonsbairn · 24/11/2023 21:38

GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 24/11/2023 18:44

In case any newcomers are looking for some inspiration, here are some J&Rs from past years.

Please don't be put off from writing one because you're concerned it has to be long/funny/detailed etc. etc., though.

The beauty of the concept is that it's totally up to what the requester and writer agree upon together. Depending on the recipient(s), it's actually sometimes more effective to do a purposely banal couple of short paragraphs. Truer to life?

Great examples here:

[from @jocktamsonsbairn]

"Waahaha! Found mine from 2014!!! 😂 it was written to someone in Canada with poster's specifications!

"To all our dear family and friends.

"Well, it's that time of year again, and can you believe it's been 12 whole months since we last shared our annual news with you all?! 2014 certainly has been an eventful year 'chez nous' - we survived the referendum, Roy's retirement and the Commonwealth Games with our usual stoical approach - you may have caught Roy on TV during the referendum campaign - he was even interviewed by a journalist eager for his opinion!

"Colin and Morag produced a very healthy sprogette early March, finally making us grandparents!

"Verity-Jayne is just delightful and is already walking, talking and showing an avid interest in reading!
She particularly loves poring over Roy's Daily Mail and is the image of Janet - although she does have Roy's chin! Such a poppet! Morag managed an all natural birth (with us vigilant grandparents sitting in the waiting room with our flask and picnic!) and coped superbly with Colin's expert support and guidance . He really is a hands on father and helps Morag with everything - even the nappy changes! Although we are sure Verity-Jayne will soon be potty trained, she is such a clever girl!

"Son and daughter in law #2 are busy house hunting and have seen several rather cute 5 bedroom detached new builds already, although Roy does remind them that older houses have Christmas Tree Windows!

"Alistair is performing marvellously in his new highly promoted role but has asked us not to brag so I will say no more! He is pleased that last year's 'situation' is long forgotten and he and Moira are forging ahead with their house hunting!

"Roy has been very busy this year, as well as his duties of Chairman of the Burns Society and President of the Rotary, he has also been elected as Captain of the Golf Club - they were just waiting for him to retire!

"So, we are now in even more demand socially as you can imagine and Janet has been busy shopping for a range of formal and informal dresses in local and far flung boutiques - even managing to procure a new DJ for Roy! Sweeping changes will now be able to be made at the GC - starting with the function suite curtains!

"The new showpiece Coachman Laser caravan has been turning heads on several outings, and fellow campers at Thurston Manor Leisure Park were positively drooling when Roy drove it slowly around the site on its virgin voyage before parking up! Janet has been busy crocheting cushion covers to give it an even more homely feel and has made Cath Kidston-esque bunting!

"We are expecting the photographs of our interior will appear on the Camping and Caravanning Club website shortly so look out for them - we are now very valued platinum members!

"We have now perfected the 'rustic' camping with only a few altercations with local farmers who seem unable to comprehend public rights of way! In fact, this also included a few security guards when we parked up at Gleneagles for the Ryder Cup! Janet was roasting partridge and Roy was busy setting up the new luxury picnic dining set when they all appeared with the local constabulary - what a hoot!

"Good thing Roy was on hand to pass on a few tips to those young European golfers who don't have the benefit of his years of experience - and haven't yet been promoted to captain of their own club!

"Janet has been busy exploring the mysterious world of online auctions and has secured many precious artefacts for mere pennies - ebay for those of you who are interested! Oh how we laughed though when the 'Commodore's Chair' arrived! It had clearly suffered from the seller's poor spelling as it was in fact a commode! Quick thinking Roy however managed to sell it to our elderly neighbour - even turning a quick profit in the process!

"Janet has been very busy with the church flower arranging and it has been suggested on numerous occasions that she enter a national competition as her skill with cut blooms is second to none! The prizes from those will soon be joining those she has been busy winning at local and national events with her legendary lemon drizzle cake.
(Sorry folks, please stop the begging letters, you know the recipe is a closely guarded secret - even Waitrose and Marks and Sparks are desperate to get their hands on it!)

"However, with Moira and Alistair now contemplating vegetarianism, Janet has perfected an outstanding spiced nut loaf and the recipe for that is enclosed - please enjoy and think of us as you bake!

"With the new luxury Coachman Laser, we are planning the "Great Janet and Roy UK tour 2015" - a detailed itinerary is currently being meticulously planned in the study, and Douglas has already managed to find us a local company happy to make 'tour t-shirts' as apparently that is the done thing these days!

"We do hope to catch up with you on our tour sometime next year as we are basing our travels on our 'Christmas Card Address Book' to try and catch as many family and friends as possible!

"Have a wonderful Christmas and a very 'merry' Hogmanay (hic)!
Best wishes to you and yours,
Janet and Roy xxx"

[from @sleighedd]

"Dear xx, we were so so happy to hear your son xx had a baby this year with y we're in the area because Roy is having his annual colonoscopy, isn't that fantastic timing!! Can't wait to see you all , don't worry about putting us up with Roy's redundancy money we bought a magnificent Winnebago and we'll just park it on your drive! We saw it had been done recently, what a fantastic way to christen it!

"Looking forward to seeing you all (please get the nice loo roll in for Roy and his colonoscopy prep)

"Janet and Roy".

Ooh I feel very proud to be highlighted as producing a great example!! Although I can't quite believe that was 9 years ago!!

I'd be happy to do one from the west coast of Scotland!

GirlWithThePearlJamEarring · 24/11/2023 21:42

@jocktamsonsbairn ,
Well-deserved. Bloody brilliant. 😆

OP posts: