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Christmas

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Original poster

Where to put everyone??

36 replies

Trinpy · 05/10/2016 12:59

PiL have decided they want to come over for Christmas this year, probably staying for around 5 days. Despite saying in previous years that we couldn't invite my parents for Xmas dinner because we don't have enough space, dh thinks we now magically have the space to host his parents for 2 Christmas meals and have them to stay for the best part of a week Hmm.

Anyway, has anyone done this and not had it turn out to be a complete nightmare? If we moved furniture around we could create a temporary space of around 7'x7' in the living room (but only if we didn't have a Xmas tree!). We would also need to borrow a table. Dh reckons we can eat all other meals in rounds - so 3 people at a time - sitting at the kitchen table.

We would also need to fit 2 adults, a baby and a toddler into a small double bedroom.

I obviously can't say no to it all or I'll be The Bitch DiL, so please help me dread it less!

OP posts:
FlouncingIntoAutumn · 05/10/2016 13:03

So you have a bedroom and a lounge?

Rather radical thoughts but could you store your bed frame, use the bedroom as a dining room by day and then put the matresses down at night?

Original poster
Trinpy · 05/10/2016 13:42

Hmmm...its a possibility. But quite awkward because the bed frame cant be taken apart and our stairs are very narrow and wind round so very difficult to get furniture up and down - it was a challenge to get the bed up the in the first place Grin. We could maybe put it on its side so it was leaning against the wall, but that would cut into room space. And we would also need to find somewhere to store all the crap under our bed too...

OP posts:
purpleladybird · 05/10/2016 14:54

Do you have a dining table now?

I'd see if you can book a budget hotel locally for a few nights to be honest.

VimFuego101 · 05/10/2016 14:59

I don't think this sounds feasible tbh, it will be miserable for all of you.

CarrotVan · 05/10/2016 15:15

Doesn't sound doable.

SymphonyofShadows · 05/10/2016 15:20

If there isn't space for your parents there isn't space for your H's. He either uninvites them or they stay in a hotel

FlouncingIntoAutumn · 05/10/2016 15:25

As another thought....

height adjustable coffee table use the sofa/ lounge chairs and dine at a slightly lower height but higher than coffee table and better than off knees. Lots of similar designs available if you don't like the styling of this one, but like the idea.

Original poster
Trinpy · 05/10/2016 15:25

No we don't have a dining table. We have a kitchen table which seats 4 (but we can only really fit 3 at a time due to space).

I think the budget hotel is a good idea. Between FiL's snoring and the baby's very frequent wakings I can't imagine any of us getting a decent nights sleep all crammed in together.

Actually I've just had an idea - of we could find a small self catering cottage locally with enough space they could stay there and we could have Xmas dinner there. Possibly? I can imagine they wouldn't really go for that option though.

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Iguessyourestuckwithme · 05/10/2016 15:27

airbnb locally?

MycatsaPirate · 05/10/2016 15:32

No. You are looking at this in the wrong way.

Op, YOU go and stay in a hotel and let dh deal with the kids and his parents. You can just pop in for christmas dinner :)

Original poster
Trinpy · 05/10/2016 15:40

Sorry x posts.

I did ask whether that meant my parents could come next year and he said oh yes of course. But it's a bit pointless now anyway because my dad's mobility has declined massively in the past year and he can longer get into our house (it's up some steps). As Dh knows.

I ran the budget hotel idea past Dh and he said he doesn't think they will agree to it because it's too expensive.

OP posts:
Original poster
Trinpy · 05/10/2016 15:41

Mycats has my favourite idea yet Smile.

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purpleladybird · 05/10/2016 16:26

So you have a kitchen with a small table in it, a lounge and two bedrooms? You could give up one bedroom if the kids come in with you?

It sounds ok for a night or two but not more. If they won't stay in a hotel I would limit them to Xmas Eve - Boxing Day and plan to go out as much as you can for walks etc.

Linpinfinwin · 05/10/2016 16:43

We did christmas dinner for 26 in a student 3 bed semi once, so I'm inclined to think these things can be done. Guests were happy to eat off laps though, and it sounds like yours won't be. To eat, can you move the kitchen table into the living room and add a camping table? Or can you really truly not squeeze 4 adults and a toddler round your table in the lounge, and put baby in a stand alone highchair? Ask people to bring outdoor chairs, or buy some stackable stools or folding chairs from ikea. For sleeping could you and/or DH use a sofa, or sofa cushions on the floor, so the 4 of you aren't in together?

I realise this might all sound ridiculous but I'm chucking ideas in the hope some might help.

purpleladybird · 05/10/2016 17:32

Have you agreed to give your room up? They might be happier to stay elsewhere if the choice is between the sofa or a hotel. If you are the ones sleeping on the sofa there's no incentive for them to go elsewhere.

Original poster
Trinpy · 05/10/2016 18:06

Thanks for the ideas.

Yes Dh's idea was that we could put them in our room. We could sleep in the living room but we would have to have baby with us because he still wakes a lot in the night. Toddler also wakes once a night from a bad dream and could get panicky/screamy if we're not close by. I suppose a compromise could be that I sleep downstairs with the baby and Dh sleeps upstairs with the toddler.

We're pretty much stuck on dates because they would be flying over here so would have to be from the 22nd-27th.

I can imagine they will want to stay with us whatever the conditions. Dh thinks they would also expect us to pay for the hotel since they are our guests which we really can't afford at the minute (I'm on mat leave). So I think the hotel option is definitely out Sad.

OP posts:
HungryHorace · 05/10/2016 18:20

They've invited themselves but think you should pay for a hotel as they're guests?!

They aren't guests. Guests are invited.

I'd personally be seeing my arse and telling DH it was a definite no way they're staying, personally.

I really don't think it's going to be feasible with your lack of space / facilities.

purpleladybird · 05/10/2016 18:28

So it sounds like sleeping arrangements are the main issue? In which case, be clear from the start they can choose between the lounge or staying elsewhere. Get your DH on side with that - if he has blocked your parents coming before to have his for 5 days is a big ask so it wouldn't be unreasonable to lay down as a condition that they don't disrupt your normal sleeping arrangements. Then look in to options to get you all out the house as much as you can from walks to carol concerts, cinema trips, coffee shops etc.

Another option might be to see how much cottages are and whether you could go to one with them? It would feel like a holiday for you and you could justifiably split the cost. You could probably also split the cost of food etc too if you're both 'going away' rather than you hosting? I expect this will be a pricey option at Xmas but worth a look especially if you only need a 2-3 bed.

Original poster
Trinpy · 05/10/2016 19:33

Well they've said that they will leave if up to me to decide if they can come but they're obviously going to be horribly offended if we say no and we'll never hear the end of it.

One time BiL came to visit and, for a number of reasons, he couldn't stay with us so we found him somewhere to stay and paid for it but asked him if he could make a contribution to the cost. FiL recently found out about this and has had a massive go at Dh for being rude by not paying for everything when BiL was purchased guest. So I think their expectation is that guests shouldn't have to pay anything.

Where to sleep and where to eat are both issues. As is the general horribleness of all having to live on top of each other. I've been doing lots of measuring and moving things around and I'm still not sure we would all even fit in.

Thanks for all the suggestions. I'm considering everything.

OP posts:
Original poster
Trinpy · 05/10/2016 19:34

Not sure whyou that 'purchased' is there. Ignore it!

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Fishface77 · 05/10/2016 19:37

Your DH sounds like a cunt. His parents are welcome but yours aren't?! I certainly wouldn't be accomadating them!

taxingtimes · 05/10/2016 19:38

Why are you trying to work out how to make this work? If your DH wants it to happen he should work out the logistics. Leave it to hI'm to sort out.

loobylou10 · 05/10/2016 19:44

Let your husband decide the logistics. He invited them so surely it's his problem to solve

loobylou10 · 05/10/2016 19:45

Great minds taxi!

taxingtimes · 05/10/2016 20:01

🙂looby I have spent too much time sorting other people's problems I don't do it anymore!