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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

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Original poster

Au pair and holiday pay

43 replies

Ghostlife · 15/06/2015 18:51

Our au pair is due to leave in 3 weeks when her contract ends.

She stopped working last Wednesday as soon as she booked her flight back home. I was not happy doing everything she is meant to do for 3 days but don't want hassle as children have GCSES and AS levels so I texted her (she is out a lot) to ask her if she wanted last 3 weeks as holidays and that I would work out how much holiday pay she was entitled to if any. It turns out she has taken all the leave in the contract - 4 weeks in 10 months already. I really cannot afford to pay her for doing nothing for 3 weeks.

Any advice?

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RedandYellow24 · 15/06/2015 18:53

If she isn't due holidays then she needs to be working. Presumably she understand you can't do free room and board for 3 weeks for free? Say she will need to work or pay you rent or leave so you can hire someone else!

BitterChocolate · 15/06/2015 19:00

I agree, offer her a choice of working as per her contract and being paid or move out before the end of the week. Personally I would allow an au pair to negotiate a little bit on this, perhaps allow her to stay on unpaid but don't provide meals or something, but only if I thought she would behave reasonably. If she is likely to be resentful and unpleasant that she is not being paid then I would rather not have her.

I think I must be very lucky so far, all of my au pairs have been lovely right up until the moment they leave. Most of them have helped me interview for a new au pair too.

Original poster

Ghostlife · 15/06/2015 19:07

Thanks I don't mind her staying for next 3 weeks as she is rarely in but I don't want to pay her when she is doing no work.

I understand that she may want to enjoy her last weeks in the UK. I offered her the option of holiday or work as she has always done the absolute minimum and is pretty lazy.

I have given her all the paid annual leave in the contract so can I just not pay her and let her stay here with room and board?

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Original poster

Ghostlife · 15/06/2015 19:09

No point asking her to work as she has already stopped working and she will do so little it will not be worth it. After this I want a break from au pairs.

OP posts:

BitterChocolate · 15/06/2015 19:21

If you're happy for her to stay then just text her telling her that she has used up all her annual leave already and so will be unpaid until she leaves.

Have you been very unlucky with au pairs? I've never had a lazy one, but I do find that they have varied in the things that they are efficient at. So I let them do more of the things they are best at and drop anything that they struggle with from their duties and do it myself.

Original poster

Ghostlife · 15/06/2015 20:17

She is kind and gentle which was the main thing but is quite lazy. I let it go but not happy to pay a lot of money for her to do nothing for 3 weeks.

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RedandYellow24 · 15/06/2015 20:20

Has she said anything about pay? If she knows she's used up all holiday and she's decided she's not working then surely she can't be expecting any.

HenriettaBarnet · 15/06/2015 20:23

How come she has stopped working? That's really odd I think - if she's still in your house then her duties should continue. Does she have duties she should be doing and is just leaving them, or would you need to make up some stuff for her to do? (probably not worth it if it is the latter).

I think you probably need to give her the option of working and getting pocket money or not working but staying for free for 3 weeks.

Original poster

Ghostlife · 15/06/2015 20:27

3 days of no work so I gave her the option to work for last 3 weeks or have it as holiday and I would work out any entitlement she may have left. She loves money so she will assume she will be paid but 7 weeks paid in 10 months is just not reasonable.

OP posts:

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 16/06/2015 10:17

Didn't you say she already used her holiday entitlement? Or is she using it up now?

Original poster

Ghostlife · 16/06/2015 10:34

She has used up all the holiday entitlement in her contract.

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DrinkFeckArseGirls · 16/06/2015 10:47

So she can't be just holidaying at your place. Chucking her out might be too heartless but I'd ask her to pay for her food, utilities costs and room. Or work.

citytocountry · 16/06/2015 11:55

I wouldn't mind letting her stay if she's not under your feet, but I wouldn't be paying her, cooking her meals or doing her washing e.g. - I'd be making that quite clear.

Original poster

Ghostlife · 16/06/2015 13:39

I am happy to let her stay here and don't mind the meals the last straw was her doing no work but still expecting to be paid. That is why I offered her the option of work or holiday as she has form for being lazy. It took me a week to get her to do work when she first started and now this as she knows she is leaving. She would have just done no work but expected £100+ on Friday. Her contract specified exact dates of her holidays which she has taken with additional time on top. Am I being reasonable?

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citytocountry · 16/06/2015 15:01

Yes, I think so. She can't expect to not work and be paid once her holiday allowance is used up (as well as have free board and lodgings!). If she doesn't like it she can always fly home earlier or, you know, actually work.

Original poster

Ghostlife · 17/06/2015 11:24

I wish she would go the atmosphere is dreadful. I have found out that her course finished yesterday instead of in 3 weeks time when she said it finished. She is just staying in her room or walking out without saying goodbye.

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TranmereRover · 17/06/2015 11:26

I'm amazed you're happy for her to live rent free without her doing anything. I would throw her out with the address of a nearby travellodge

Original poster

Ghostlife · 17/06/2015 13:34

I know I should but I just don't want any hassle. I feel a fool for being easy going with her. She is in a mood as she obviously thought I would pay her for doing nothing for 3 weeks. As she stopped working for 3 days I gave her the option either work or holiday until she left and said I would work out any entitlement left. She knows she is well over contract days. She is nearly 30.

OP posts:

FlorenceMattell · 17/06/2015 23:27

Nearly 30 ? And still behaving like a spoiled child.
You sound lovely , she is lucky.

Original poster

Ghostlife · 18/06/2015 00:20

I really have had enough I went out tonight to see a friend and she expected me to come back and cook for her. Her parents spoilt her rotten and it shows. I can't wait for her to go.

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citytocountry · 18/06/2015 12:05

Stuff that! You do sound lovely, but you are being a bit of a pushover to be honest. I would let her stay rather than face the hassle of throwing her out, but strictly on a no pay, no cooking/washing for her etc basis, and she still has to be civil and nice to everyone and or she is out on her ear.

TheJunctionBaby · 18/06/2015 12:14

I'd ask for keys back and give her until Sunday to vacate. She's taking the piss. I'd also report her to the agency to save some other family from suffering the same.

TranmereRover · 18/06/2015 12:55

on the bright side, you are gaining a valuable life lesson in how not to ruin your own children. Please take the keys back and let the agency know. It won't be hassle, it will be additional days / weeks of freedom from her tyranny

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 18/06/2015 13:05

OMG, chuck her out. And I'm saying it as an ex-au-pair. You need to tell her you're doing herba favour by letting her stay and she should really be paying you!

Radiatorvalves · 18/06/2015 13:05

Bloody hell. My (lovely) male 22yo AP never expects me to cook for him, although he joins in when I do cook (and sometimes I eat food he has cooked).

She sound dreadful on every level. Good luck....

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