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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

Birth plans

106 replies

magnumicelolly · 12/12/2013 20:06

Tell me about yours? What was/is on it? All thoughts appreciated!

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ZingChoirsOfAngels · 12/12/2013 20:21

when I attended my antenatal class with DS1 the MW said that most people who write a very detailed birth plan end up with a C-section!

it was a joke of course, but it made me realise, that birth plans are good to make you think through what you actually want - but you also have to realise that none of what you hope for might actually happen at the end!

so with that in mind I remember writing things like I'd like baby to be delivered on to my tummy, I plan to Bf straightaway, we'd like DH to cut the cord and that I want every pain relief option available and administered.
I agreed to vit K injection for baby and the injection that speeds up the delivery of the placenta.

and also (having watched a very eye-opening documentary) I stated that in order to save my life if the womb doesn't contract down I agree to have a full hysterectomy...in a life and death situation I'd rather be alive with one, than dead while they trying to save an organ. (sorry, it made me feel better to have it in writing!)

I also stated that I agree to any procedure (ELSC, even under GA) if that means saving baby's life and in case of me not being able to communicate my wishes/decisions I'm happy for my husband to make any decisions as I trust he will choose what's best in any given situation.

that was with DS1.

we've got 6 children, by the time it was DD's turn (youngest) I just wrote on every page with bold red letters "I WANT AN EPIDURAL!"

when it was time, the MW scanned through the notes, looked up and grinned " and how do you feel about pain relief?" Grin

hth

Aeroaddict · 12/12/2013 20:26

I didn't have one, there didn't seem to be any point, as until I was in labour I had no idea what I would want or how I would react. If I'd had a second child I might have had one then as I had a better idea of how I wanted things to go.

I think it is a bad idea to have a fixed idea of what you want to happen, as it can leave you feeling like things have gone wrong if it goes differently. Ultimately if Mum and baby are healthy at the end, then does it really matter how you get there?

DirtyDancing · 12/12/2013 20:26

I called mine a birth preferences plan, it helped me realise that it's really about giving the midwife a sense of the type of birth I want, and how I hope it goes, but not everything might go to plan! I kept it short, simple and made sure it was not like a complicated shopping list. More general statements such as "I am aiming for a natural birth avoiding interventions where possible"

puntasticusername · 12/12/2013 20:26

My plan this time is much shorter than last time - trying to keep in mind that the midwives might not have long to read and absorb it!

In general, I've asked please to keep everything as calm and low key as possible - personally, I can't bear fuss and faff and I don't ever like being the centre of attention, so please just let me get my head down and get on with it in my own way.

I put that I don't want anyone to talk about "pushing into your bottom". I have an irrational hatred of that phrase. My community midwife now thinks I'm a complete weirdo for putting that on my plan, though Smile

You might find it helpful to outline your wishes regarding pain relief - I'm hoping to avoid it so have asked that the midwives please encourage me to do that as far as possible - but obviously, we have to see what happens on the day really.

Oh, I put that I'm a stubborn git and sometimes hang on to ideas beyond all reason eg "I want to do this without pain relief", so please involve DH fully in decision making, as he stands the best chance of being able to persuade me to do the sensible things Grin

Physiological third stage if possible.

Most importantly: these are my preferences but they are only preferences...in the end nothing is more important than mine and baby's safety so if all of this has to go right out of the window on the day in the name of safety, so be it, I'm not THAT bothered.

Finally - NO SODDING BOUNTY PEOPLE at any price. Absolutely 100% non negotiable. This is for their benefit as much as mine.

DirtyDancing · 12/12/2013 21:48

puntasticusername - lol to no Bounty people for their own safety! I'm with you there!

puntasticusername · 12/12/2013 21:56

Yup Grin I'm totally serious about the Bounty thing. If any of them come near me or my baby trying to get hold of our personal data for their nefarious purposes...I simply can't guarantee their ongoing health and wellbeing, that's all.

QuietNinjaTardis · 13/12/2013 08:41

I just wrote a few bullet points like I have spd so need to be careful and I wanted to be reminded to wee and happy for baby to have vit k. I wanted a physiological third stage and skin to skin. The midwife read it and was happy to help me achieve what I wanted. I was very lucky that things went to plan this time.

MiaowTheCat · 13/12/2013 08:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
magnumicelolly · 13/12/2013 20:02

Thank you all!

What does the vit K injection do?

What do you mean by physiological 3rd stage?

OP posts:
princesscupcakemummyb · 13/12/2013 20:15

ive wrote one with each pregnancy ive had (3)
each time ive only put the basics on it

latest one included

*baby to be delivered right on to me for skin to skin contact and bonding

*delayed cord clamping

*dh to cut the cord

*vit k injection

*no pain relief not even gas and air i followed through with this

Original poster
magnumicelolly · 18/12/2013 15:58

Thank you :)

OP posts:
Shellywelly1973 · 18/12/2013 16:02

Im exoecting dc 6. I couldn't get to my 34 wk appointment & mw called me. She made a remark about knowing what to put on it & I said put nothing. I've never had a birth plan. If I had a birth plan it wou like d say- leave me alone! Literally! !

ThurlHoHoHow · 18/12/2013 20:04

Mine said "Drugs" Grin

I'd say it's probably best to just keep it to things that really, really mean a lot to you. So Vit K injections, DH cutting or not cutting the cord, that's it.

I honestly don't remember anyone reading it though!

If this is your first labour then you don't really know how you will react. So if you do write one, don't be too strict about things. Say that you'd prefer a water birth with your hypnobirth CD playing, for example, but saying "no drugs" (if there's no medical reason for no drugs) could work against you if you decide for one reason or another that you'd like something. Not saying you have to, obviously, but your plans can change dramatically when you're actually in labour.

lilyaldrin · 18/12/2013 20:08

I didn't really have a birth plan, just preferences:
delayed cord clamping
physiological 3rd stage
vitamin K orally

I think that was it.

StarlightMcKingsThree · 18/12/2013 20:15

I had no bounty people in my birth plan.

I also had no internal examinations.

No coaching.

No getting out of the pool to deliver placenta.

No injection.

No touching me.

No McRoberts Manoeuvre.

No Sweep.

No Induction.

No breaking waters.

No touching the baby until after his/her first feed.

StarlightMcKingsThree · 18/12/2013 20:17

Oh yep.

No cutting cord until baby arrived.

No vit K (weird insistence on getting a written note from a paed saying this was okay, which obviously I didn't do).

StarlightMcKingsThree · 18/12/2013 20:17

Sorry, not cutting cord until placenta arrived, obviously.

lilyaldrin · 18/12/2013 20:19

I'm going to add "no sweeps without gaining my prior consent" this time too actually.

TwistedRib · 18/12/2013 20:21

Starlight
Did you get all of those requests? There are a lot of "no"s there.
How did the midwife assess you without doing an internal?

StarlightMcKingsThree · 18/12/2013 20:22

I got what I wanted.

Why would a midwife need to assess me? Assess me for what?

TwistedRib · 18/12/2013 20:23

You're lucky things went smoothly- would you have altered your wishes if there had been complications?

StarlightMcKingsThree · 18/12/2013 20:26

Why was I lucky things went smoothly? They went smoothly because of my detailed birth plan.

Why would a midwife have trouble assessing me though.

StarlightMcKingsThree · 18/12/2013 20:26

What would have needed to be altered if things hadn't gone smoothly?

What do you mean by 'not smoothly'?

ThurlHoHoHow · 18/12/2013 20:29

Starlight, I am really, really happy for you that you got what you wanted. However a detailed birth plan won't have caused some of that. Internal exams are there to find out how dilated you are, and most of what you asked for would only happen if neither you or the baby started to get a bit ill and had to be out of the pool.

Really don't mean this in a having a go way, but it's misleading to women facing their first birth to say that having a detailed birth plan means you will get the birth you wanted. I quite wanted a water birth. I would have preferred a lot of what you said. But a 2 day early labour and a baby who started to get seriously ill stopped all of that.