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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Is it too late to start breastfeeding my daughter again at two and a half??!!

77 replies

spiderpig · 08/08/2008 14:16

Ok strange question I know!

But I am breastfeeding her two month old brother which she has been quite intrigued by, she has asked for 'mummy milk' a few times but I just gave her a taste on my finger.

However today she has been a bit out of sorts and while the baby was asleep she pretty much begged for me to let her try a breastfeed, so with much trepidation I did and..............

She loved it she hasn't had a breastfeed since she was 6 months old but latched on really gently (with no biting ) and my milk let down instantly so she got quite a bit, after she said 'mmmmmmm nice drink'

Soooooo if she wants to try it again would that be ok? Or is it too....well I want to say weird but that's not the right word iyswim? would it affect my milk supply for my baby? or do you think I should be trying to gently discouage her

Help so confused lol!

OP posts:
LynseyKCalvert · 08/08/2008 14:39

It's not unheard of for a toddler to return to nursing after they've weaned on the arrival of a new sibling. Some peopl have said it can help counter sibling rivalry/jealousy.

I say if you're happy to do it go for it. Your body will produce milk for both children.

I know plenty of woman who tandem feed and it works just fine for them.

lulumama · 08/08/2008 14:43

if she still latch on and you got a let down, i say go for it! your body will produce enough to allow tandem nursing. she might only want it for a while, until the novelty wears off, but if she and you are happy , then go for it. no need to discourage if you are happy for her to feed.

MrsJamin · 08/08/2008 14:43

I don't know anything to advise but it sounds like a lovely way for your DD to feel close to you with a new baby around!

derelicte · 08/08/2008 14:46

I think it's 'morally' fine and it's won't negatively affect the baby's supply. I wouldn't be surprised if it turned out to be a fad though...you know what they can be like!

DD wanted to try it when I had DS (she was 19/20 months old, and hadn't been BFed for about 6 months). I let her and she looked a bit confused and gave my nipple a tiny kiss. It was sweet, but kind of sad iykwim? She did that a couple more times, and that was that.

lilymolly · 08/08/2008 14:47

Sorry totally politically incorrect and very un -mumsnet but NO NO NO....

Not for me anyway........wierd wierd wierd

each to their own I suppose

Brangelina · 08/08/2008 14:54

There's nothing wrong with this, my friend's DS started again after he'd self-weaned when little bro came along. Fortuistously in his case, as he caught a bad bout of gastro-entiritis and the bfing got him through it relatively unscathed.

Remember that she's only a toddler and in many parts of the world would not have stopped bfing, so it is really perfectly normal. I'm still feeding mine at 3+.

You will of course always have some weirdo who thinks it's icky, but remember it's your and your DD's business only.

popsycal · 08/08/2008 14:57

i am half expecting ds2 to want to do this when ds3 arrives in sept - he will be 3.5 but only stopped feeding in febreuary....

not sure how i feel about it in my personal situation....

Onestonetogo · 08/08/2008 15:00

Message withdrawn

mrsleroyjethrogibbs · 08/08/2008 15:00

if it works for you then go for it.
Its perfectly normal, after all thats what boobs are there for

popsycal · 08/08/2008 15:01

onestonetogo - it really is NOT the same as putting her back in bnappies

charleymouse · 08/08/2008 15:04

Not at all strange IMO DD 3.8 still feeds alebit occcasionally. She was quite pleased after DS was born that he had brought the milk with him so they could share it. Much thanking of DS ensued. It helped her and I to bond again as I had been in hospital and was something they could share.

DS now 16 months and last night they both cuddled up and had one side each until she let go, DS swapped sides then she wanted it back and told me to teach him to share

Should not affect baby one iota. Just be careful in your positioning that she does not squash him or use as opportunity to nip/squeeze him. (Not that she should). Would not discourage it as it will look like favouritism towards DS.

lilymolly · 08/08/2008 15:12

Agree same as putting her back into nappies.
When my dc is born next year dd will be 3, I expect her to be the big sister, and realise that the new baby is the "baby" of the family and she now has the role of big sister which comes with its own rewards.

I am certainly not a wierdo btw, just not a fan of extended bf, and to stop and go back is even worse for me, its giving her conflicting messages

popsycal · 08/08/2008 15:15

it is not the same as nappies....
it is not 'baby-ing'.......

i fed ds2until he was almost 3 and dont think i woiuld encourage him to restart agai BUT i dont fe`el it is baby-ing. I think it is difficult to understand unless you have fed a toddler (or older...~)

scorpio1 · 08/08/2008 15:16

they are still little at 3.

TinkerBellesMum · 08/08/2008 15:20

I think it's great. I'm still feeding Tink at 2 with another on the way, she will be 2 1/2 when baby comes. BM's the perfectly balanced meal for any human of any age and in some countries it is given to the sick and elderly.

It may pass, but go with it if you are comfortable and see what happens.

Original poster
spiderpig · 08/08/2008 15:21

Thank you some conflicting advice here but I am grateful for all opinions!

Can only post quickly as my ds is gearing up for a feed and I'll be back on later but I juat wanted to say that while the feeding thing has thrown me a bit and I'm unsure what I'm going to do, I have no problem 'babying' older children when a new sibling comes along....I have done so to a degree with all of my older children (rocking them like a baby, feeding them a yogurt etc etc)it's like a game and reassuring them they are still my baby and they soon get completely bored of it I also think it has helped because we now have 5 children and absolutely no sibling rivalry whatsoever. I never expect them to suddenly become more grown up and the older brother/sister and because of this they are happy to do it as it becomes their choice iyswim

OP posts:
LynseyKCalvert · 08/08/2008 15:24

I think "expecting" a three year old to "take on a role" can be tricky. Adapting to a new sibling can be hard enough without having "expectations" put on one so young. I'm wondering what message you think is being conflictred. I think it can be very reassuring for the older sibling to know that mum is still there is this way that the child is explicitly asking for. Why is that wrong to show? I can understand it not feeling right for you and it's not something I'd expect everyone to do but if all parties are happy where's the harm?

lilymolly · 08/08/2008 15:25

good luck in whatever you decide to do.
Its your decision and I wish you all the best.

LynseyKCalvert · 08/08/2008 15:26

Spiderpig, it's sounds like you're doing a brilliant job.
It's very normal for some regression when a new sibling arrives and it's seems like you've dealt with it beautifully.

derelicte · 08/08/2008 15:29

V good post LynseyK (and have just seen you're new to MN, so welcome! )

lilymolly · 08/08/2008 15:29

Not going to put any pressure on her to behave differently, just I want her to learn that life moves on, and the addition of a new member of the family means she will have to expect some changes, its inevitable.
I want her to move on and continue with her growth, not move backwards iyswim.
At the end of the day its got nothing to do with me.

I just think that breastfeeding children over the age of 1 is something mothers do for themselves rather than their children.
It may be a controversial point of view, but thats how I feel sorry

GreenMonkies · 08/08/2008 15:30

My eldest will be 5 in three weeks and nurses at bedtime and in the morning, it is not baby-ing, and not the same as being in nappies (both my girls have potty trained at 21 months.......). Humans are "designed" to nurse for years, not months, the natural age of weaning is between 3 and 7 years, with the global avarage age of 4. It is only in western cultures that we wean our babies so early, whilst they are still infants, and don't continue to breastfeed them well into thier toddlerhood/pre-school years.

So, Spiderpig, to answer your question, there is nothing to stop you nursing both your children, if your DD wants to nurse it's perfectly natural, in many countries she would still be nursing now any way. She will definately benefit from antibodies to boost her (not quite fully mature) immune system and it will probably ease any feelings of sibling rivalry/jealousy. As far as I'm concerned it's brilliant and to be encouraged!

There is absolutely no harm in it what so ever, and if you are comfortable with it then ignore anyone who says you shouldn't be doing it.

Monkies

Hecate · 08/08/2008 15:33

I think just go with the flow! She obviously wants to, it's no problem, can't hurt her in any way and if it makes things easier for you with the new baby, what the hell. She's only a baby herself, really. It sounds like she feels a bit pushed out and wants to be close to you. (Not meaning YOU are pushing her out, just that she was the baby of the family and now there's this interloper )

StealthPolarBear · 08/08/2008 15:36

I just think that breastfeeding children over the age of 1 is something mothers do for themselves rather than their children.

Yes, cos that's just what I want to do at 3am

4andnotout · 08/08/2008 15:40

My dd3 will be 13 months when dd4 arrives and i intend to bf fully which i havent done before.DD3 was mix fed but if she wants to latch on again and have bm i will be quite happy.

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