Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Is it too late to start breastfeeding my daughter again at two and a half??!!

77 replies

spiderpig · 08/08/2008 14:16

Ok strange question I know!

But I am breastfeeding her two month old brother which she has been quite intrigued by, she has asked for 'mummy milk' a few times but I just gave her a taste on my finger.

However today she has been a bit out of sorts and while the baby was asleep she pretty much begged for me to let her try a breastfeed, so with much trepidation I did and..............

She loved it she hasn't had a breastfeed since she was 6 months old but latched on really gently (with no biting ) and my milk let down instantly so she got quite a bit, after she said 'mmmmmmm nice drink'

Soooooo if she wants to try it again would that be ok? Or is it too....well I want to say weird but that's not the right word iyswim? would it affect my milk supply for my baby? or do you think I should be trying to gently discouage her

Help so confused lol!

OP posts:
combustiblelemon · 08/08/2008 15:40

I saw the first line of your post and was StealthPolarBear. I thought you must be having a funny turn.

GreenMonkies · 08/08/2008 15:40

"I just think that breastfeeding children over the age of 1 is something mothers do for themselves rather than their children."

Lilymolly,

Not true And when your new baby arrives I wouldn't expect anything from your DD, be prepared for her to regress, and need extra cuddles, rather than "expect her to be the big sister, and realise that the new baby is the "baby" of the family and she now has the role of big sister which comes with its own rewards".

Monkies

LynseyKCalvert · 08/08/2008 15:41

Crikey that old chestnut! Why do think there is no value for the child after one year? It goes against what most major health organisations say.
I'm always curious about the statement of mothers doing it for their own need. What does that mean? I do actually get something out of it but it not something different to what I've always got. What happens on a childs first birthday that makes it suddenly nutritionally void/needless/redundant or somehow sexual or otherwise "icky"?

Mungarra · 08/08/2008 15:43

It's up to you, but my friend did this when her daughter was 3 (she'd been breastfed until about 9 months before) and her son was a newborn. She ended up breastfeeding her every night and didn't stop until her daughter was 4 and that only happened because my friend put her foot down about it. My friend regretted letting her daughter try it.

My children have asked for it a couple of times and I've said 'it's for babies' and they've left it at that.

Older children do need to know that they are still your 'baby' but there are other ways of reassuring them. DS1 wanted spoonfeeding for ages.

derelicte · 08/08/2008 15:44

Quite, SPB. Rather like I want small hands scrabbling at my boobs at the check-out, and for my nipple to be pulled forcefully from the confines of my bra like a piece of stubborn chewing gum.

scorpio1 · 08/08/2008 15:44

My ds2 who was FF has asked for 'booby milk' since dd (BF) has come along. i didn't let him at first, but after i asked DH what he thought, if he wants to he can try. He is still my baby.

I want to BF dd for a long time yet.

lilymolly · 08/08/2008 15:46

Of course whe will need extra cuddles etc I am not a monster you know.

and if you choose to bf your child at 3am then thats up to you. As i said earlier its your choice.

Tbh I am stuck in bed ill and prob being a little bit grouchy sorry x

Its just in my "humble" and "very limited" experience....... my friends who choose to extend breastfeeding had issues with their partner/husbands so I presumed (may have been wrong) that they extended this bf to make the close bond last a little bit longer cos they where missing it from elsewhere.

Prob Bollocks but hey thats my theory

chipmonkey · 08/08/2008 15:46

My Mum gave me pureed food when my dsis was little. It was yum!

I'd say, let her! It will be good for her, too!

GreenMonkies · 08/08/2008 15:48

"Yes, cos that's just what I want to do at 3 am "

Yes, me too, when DD2 wakes and asks for booby at 2 am I rejoice!!

Actually, she's teething right now, all 4 canines at once, her poor gums really look sore, so when she wakes crying and asking for booby I am glad I don't do Western Early Weaning, because nursing calms, soothes and sends her back off to sleep so easily, I dread to think how long I'd be up with a miserable child if I couldn't just snuggle up in bed with her and doze off whilst she boobs!

Monkies

lilymolly · 08/08/2008 15:48

Mungarra put it a little more eloquently than perhaps I did that was the point I was trying to make- There are other ways

chipmonkey · 08/08/2008 15:51

BTW, I bf ds3 till he was 2.8 and only weaned him because I could not get pg while bfing. Bfing him till that age was entirely his idea, let me tell you! There was nothing in it for me and my relationship with my dh is just fine. And if my relationship with dh were not fine, I can't see that extended bf would do much to compensate.

whomovedmychocolate · 08/08/2008 15:53

I'm still breastfeeding my 21 month old (and honestly it's not for myself - it's exhausting making milk for two) as well as a newborn. I think it's up to you and your child to decide and none of anyone else's business.

It's also lovely to feed a toddler because they can actually say thank you too

taliac · 08/08/2008 15:53

DD1 (2) is very curious about "mummy milk" and often asks to taste. She usually asks for some on her finger but once she tried drinking like DD2 does, didn't know what to do though.

In our case, it doesn't stop her being the Big Sister, but it does stop her from feeling excluded so I think its pretty healthy really.

FWIW, sometimes she likes to pretend to feed her toys with her as the "mummy" and the toy stuffed down her top. And sometimes she likes to play at being the baby, she wraps herself up, sucks her thumb and makes baby noises. I think its all pretty acceptable stuff at this age.

TinkerBellesMum · 08/08/2008 15:54

"I just think that breastfeeding children over the age of 1 is something mothers do for themselves rather than their children."

Oh yeah, I just looove having my sore-pregnant nipples munched on! Yes I love everything that I loved at the start, but I know that it is important to Tink and that she is getting something and that's worth more than the odd nip or getting up early.

Mungarra, there is nothing wrong with feeding till 4, even if there was a gap there if the mother is happy to, she can stop it any time she wants - Monkies for example has a nursling almost 5 as she's just said. It has nothing to do with restarting. If she hadn't stopped in the first place maybe her daughter would have carried on that long anyway.

It seems to me that the objectors don't really have anything to base their answers on. The ones who are saying what's wrong with it are the ones who believe there is nothing wrong with extended feeding.

I've just been telling Tink today that she's my baby, she wrapped herself in a cot quilt and lay on my lap like a baby as she was tired. I've hugged and rocked her and told she's my baby and soon we will have two babies, but she will still be my baby.

LynseyKCalvert · 08/08/2008 15:54

Yep it is bollocks lilymolly ;) I am pretty fulfilled in most areas of my life and am lucky enough to have great support from DH and family. I BF my 22 month old because he needs it. It can be inconvenient at times but most aspects of parenting can be. I do enjoy it and I do get a lot from it not least the health benefits but knowing I'm doing a wonderful thing for my child feels really good. I don't think you should be made to feel like a martyr in order to feel you are a "good" mum.

lilymolly · 08/08/2008 15:54

maybe I am in the wrong here, prob am.
I did not mind one jot getting up 5 or 6 times in the night with dd to bf her, when she was 0 - 6months and it was her only form of food. But once she was on solids and was eating enough to last all night without food, I thought it would be more beneficial for her to have a full 12 hours sleep.
I stopped feeding her in the middle of the night, occasionally she would wake up, teething etc. I soothed her, and she slept again.
There was NO WAY i was getting dd into a habot of being breast fed back to sleep cos that would be torture for me.
Prob will have nightmare child 2nd time around as punishment for having such an angel dd

whomovedmychocolate · 08/08/2008 15:55

My HV explained this really well actually - she said of sibling rivalry: it's the same situation as if my DH bought home a younger, very beautiful new wife and told me she would live with us and then asked me to give her a cuddle. So for DD she's displaced. Regression or needing more attention/cuddles/feeds is completely normal.

GreenMonkies · 08/08/2008 15:55

Lilymolly,

I have a very close, affectionate relationship with my DP, I don't wean my babies early because I have read all the information and made a fully informed decision based on the knowledge that it is natural and healthy to nurse them this long, and potentially detrimental to wean them earlier.

Monkies

Here's the link again, the other one didn't seem to work, sorry!

charchargabor · 08/08/2008 15:56

I think it's fine. It's so hard for them when a new baby comes along and demands all of your attention, they need a bit of nurturing to let them know they are still your baby as well. If bfing is what she feels she needs, and you're comfortable with it, then I'd say go ahead! It'll probably peter out anyway when she gets used to the baby being around.

charchargabor · 08/08/2008 15:58

Oh, and I am just embarking on ext bfing with my DD, who turned 1 yesterday. I have a wonderfully close relationship with my DP, and he supports me 100%.

DisenchantedPlusBump · 08/08/2008 15:59

I don't think its 'odd' at all,

personally If DS (2.5 when new baby arrives) asks to be breastfed I will say no, simply because i never breastfed him (well i did but only for a few days) but if we had got to 6 months old together whilst BFing I may consider it.

If you are both happy good for you

TinkerBellesMum · 08/08/2008 16:00

derelicte I'm just glad she hasn't quite figure out how to undo the clasp, but her new trick is to try and put me away after a feed!

"my friends who choose to extend breastfeeding had issues with their partner/husbands so I presumed (may have been wrong) that they extended this bf to make the close bond last a little bit longer cos they where missing it from elsewhere."

Ha, no relationship problems here, pregnant again and erm... yeah... relationship is great!

TinkerBellesMum · 08/08/2008 16:05

whomovedmychocolate, that's a brilliant analogy.

Lynsey, your DH is gorgeous though!

GreenMonkies · 08/08/2008 16:05

And to clear up a point, breastfeeding until a child stops asking is not Extended Breastfeeding, it is Natural Term Breastfeeding. The cultural norm in the UK and some other western societies of the mother deciding to stop nursing, especially when the baby is under 18 months or so, is actually Early Weaning.

Monkies [scuttles off to Pedants Corner....]

TinkerBellesMum · 08/08/2008 16:06

lol Monkies, I left that one alone.