The 3rd Gemini Luxury Bus

[Librarina]

I thought I'd get our shiny new thread started, welcome.
Previos Thread

I also thought I'd include our little round up of who is having what, when...feel free to update, there's only a few of us so we shouldn't end up drowning in Stats!

kittykats : girl
JoJo: boy
Bringon: girl
Frust: boy
Blending: one of each
Lib: surprise - 1st baby - EDD June 7th
Lor: surprise (for now!)
Ohtheplaces: girl - 1st baby - EDD June 5th
Peardrop: boy

Oh I'm heartbroken and eternally shamed...there's a typo!

kittykats : girl
JoJo: boy
Bringon: girl- baby #3- EDD June 10th.
Frust: boy
Blending: one of each
Lib: surprise - 1st baby - EDD June 7th
Lor: surprise (for now!)
Ohtheplaces: girl - 1st baby - EDD June 5th
Peardrop: boy

Ahhh I'd added a big msg to the other thread and lost it!!!
Pear I was going to say good luck with keeping them off the sweet stuff ha ha it's the bloody grandparents, honestly mine are a nightmare when they were strict with us and insists dd needs puddings etc for calories?! To the point of forcing it on her when she says no!!!
I've given up now as even nursery let them have chocolate etc when they "bake" although I have managed to stick to water, you'd be surprised how many people still try to offer juice though!
Ali, very jeleous of Holliday!!
Bit about me
Kittykats, one dd, due dd2 29th may, 34 from the north and a fingerprint expert
Can't update list as on my phone

Hah hah how mean would it be to tell everyone your child is allergic to chocolate and sweets? I can see this is going to be a battle! We can only try!

Oh jeeze, tell me about getting strange looks from other parents! DH and very, very rarely will have sweets at home for the kids to eat. We try to limit what they get outside the home, but it's so hard! They turn into true little devils when they get sugar and high fructose corn syrup so we've been really picky about them going to birthday parties from kids in preschool (except for the kids that they really like) just because of all of the cake and candy they get filled up with. DS1 is also allergic to milk and his reactions are starting to become true allergic reactions instead of just presenting as eczema after a few days so trying to tell someone that our kids don't have milk, yogurt, cheese, or most chocolate including everything that has those things in them just blows people's minds. Of course the kids who have peanut allergies have had a school-wide policy developed for them and everything nut-related is banned, but my kids keep getting fed milk and cheese crackers all day despite the continued insistence that he is allergic! Parenting is so bloody hard sometimes! .

Exactly bring, it's a nightmare plus I know you'd get the whole gosh she's mean/ over the top if you don't let them join in a party's when all the other kids are having them, it's all I can do to monitor fruit shoots and even now I think I may let her have those at party's etc as a "treat" so that we stay away from cola etc, I know there isn't many that will put that out but still.... Will hold off as long as poss but my plan on not giving chocolate before she was 2 failed badly and not only is it a word used regularly ( I mean every day!! She doesn't get it but asks for it) she seems to be able to sniff it out so we can't eat it either!! Believe me you can't say no easily to a child when your having it especially when we've tought her to say pees ( please) and she's so darn cute lol

kittykats : girl
JoJo: boy
Bringon: girl- baby #3- EDD June 10th.
Frust: boy
Blending: one of each
Lib: surprise - 1st baby - EDD June 7th
Lor: surprise (and staying that way!) - 1st baby - EDD June 9th
Ohtheplaces: girl - 1st baby - EDD June 5th
Peardrop: boy

Everyone have a good weekend? I got to catch up with my friend and their 8 week old boy yesterday - and hear all about her birth and compare pregnancy notes. Great fun. He's a lovely little thing.

Got my scan at 2.30pm tomorrow. Can't wait! Dying to have another look and also get that reassurance that everything's okay. I know I asked before about whether I have to drink all the water before this one, and I remember one person replied and said they'd drank some - did the rest of you drink a lot of water before this scan?

I am so uncomfortable at night though. I bought one of those Theraline pillows which is quite comfy but you can't really move it from side to side at night and even with that if I lie in one position too long I wake up with massive aches in my hips, or sometimes legs. Driving me crazy. My lower back is killing me at night too. Might see if my yoga teachers can suggest anything.

Oh and just to add some more info on me, I'm 36, this is first baby, I'm from Dublin originally but been in London for over 9 years. I still live in Central London and work in advertising production at a newspaper.

Lor good luck with the scan. I've given up drinking before the scan because they always tell me to empty my bladder and then if I'm kept waiting its a very uncomfortable wait etc so I've learnt it's better to go in not bursting and then they can send me away for a sugary drink if the baby is head down (which is always) to try and get it to move.

Forgot to add I am also uncomfortable at night. I understand you're meant to lie on your left but its not very comfy! I've brought the Carla breastfeeding pillow from the Tesco baby event half price. Hoping that might help as I really don't want to spend £40 on a genie pillow that will spend most of its life in the attic!

Oooh! Shiny new thread! I wondered why noone had updated the other one for a while!

kittykats : girl - baby #2 - EDD May 29th
JoJo: boy - baby #2 - EDD June 4th
Bringon: girl- baby #3- EDD June 10th.
Frust: boy
Blending: one of each
Lib: surprise - 1st baby - EDD June 7th
Lor: surprise - 1st baby - EDD June 9th
Ohtheplaces: girl - 1st baby - EDD June 5th
Peardrop: boy

Is that really all we are now? How sad! Hopefully we'll get a few more joining us towards the end when they're looking for hand-holding as the due date looms! I did that with DS1, wasn't the same as having gone through it all together though!

A bit more about me: From Wales originally, now in SW England. I'm 26 & planning on being a home-schooling SAHM for the foreseeable future!

Hi everyone, I've been lurking for a while as I was feeling really torn about something, which I've now decided to share...

I'm a midwife, I work in the community in the South West. I didn't share this to begin with as I wanted to experience this pregnancy the same as all of you - with excitement and discovery. The excellent advice from Bringon meant that all your technical questions were answered so I didn't feel like I was with-holding anything useful. I hope you understand?

Anyway, now that I'm further along (20+3 today) and got a proper bump that I think I actually felt wriggle for the first time on Saturday night, I am beginning to relax a bit more and get properly into it all.

I've also got my 20 week scan tomorrow at 2.30pm. I've been really undecided about finding out the gender, but we've come to the decision that we will wait for a surprise. I know how special this is from experience of caring for couples who didn't find out!

Is anyone thinking of doing NCT classes? I'm thinking it might be a really good idea, mainly for the social side of things. I've also just got hold of the Hypnobirthing book and CD as I've seen some amazing births by women who have used this method.

Lor, the info sheet that came with my 20/40 scan invite told me to drink 1 to 1.5 pints water at least an hour beforehand. I think it just makes the scan easier when the baby isn't tucked down in the pelvis.

To add to your growing list: as revealed above, I'm a midwife, I'm 34, first baby and due 7th June!

If any of you have any questions that you want to ask, particularly related to labour/delivery in the UK, then feel free and ask away!!

Welcome to the bus Merry - you may regret making that offer! I've had loads of silly questions. Thanks for the info about drinking water before the scan. I made my appt. when I was leaving after my 12 week one so I never got a letter or information sheet.

I think I am going to do the NCT classes. I wasn't sure and was wavering back and forth but my friends yesterday said she found them great so I think I will. I don't know people in the area so it's as much to meet people as anything. Also, since I don't know much about having babies I need all the help I can get!

Good luck with your scan tomorrow!

Hi merry!

I've heard good things about NCT in our area & have several people encouraging me to do it but I have a couple of issues - the cheapest course I've looked at is £60 - we don't have that money just sitting around & although they do offer reductions for low-income families the amount DH earns is near the threshold so I doubt we'd get much of a reduction. I'm also really scared of meeting new people & going to new places. We could find a babysitter so DH could come too but then I'd just hide behind him & not talk to anyone! I do have several friends who are due about the same time so they're already my antenatal group but then they all have other friends outside of our group & I don't so I think it would be good for me to make some other friends! I can't decide if the money thing is a genuine issue or if it's an excuse to avoid doing something scary! I might have a chat with DH about it & see if we have a bit of cash to splash!

Hi and welcome to Merry! We are a very lucky thread to have 2 midwives on board. It must be weird seeing things from the other side of the table as it were. My friend is a Health Visitor and she quite often didn't admit that at anti-natal appointments as she had as many questions as any of us still, it's nice to have another Mum to be on our little bus.

I'll not be doing NCT I don't think, partly because of cost but mostly because I'm a bit anti-social and don't really want to make new friends! I've just signed up with my local Sure Start though so I'll join their new baby group when bubs comes so hopefully will meet some nice local mums there.

Can you believe we're half way through - beans are a-kicking and bumps are growing. I've reorganised the list so that we're in chronological order... control freak much?

kittykats : girl - baby #2 - EDD May 29th
JoJo: boy - baby #2 - EDD June 4th
Lib: surprise - 1st baby - EDD June 7th
Ohtheplaces: girl - 1st baby - EDD June 5th
Merrygiant: 1st baby EDD 7th June
Lor: surprise - 1st baby - EDD June 9th
Bringon: girl- baby #3- EDD June 10th.
Frust: boy
Blending: one of each
Peardrop: boy

Thanks everyone, it's a weight off my mind!

Jojo, have you looked at going to a Sure Start Children's Centre? There is usually at least one in each town. They offer free courses/classes for expectant parents and children up to the age of 5. The ones that I deal with do Bumps and Babes groups, Dads-to-be classes and then loads of baby/toddler/playgroups for when baby makes its appearance. Might be worth a look.

I know exactly what you and Lib mean about not wanting to meet new friends or people. But I also know that the newborn/baby days can be terribly isolating, so I really want to try to get involved with a social group in pregnancy that can carry on afterwards. OH is not so keen, usual bloke thing of not being able to see the benefits. But we saw friends yesterday who have a 6 week old baby and met some of their NCT friends and heard from them all about how helpful it was to share the experience.

I did an aquanatal class last Monday, but it was so freezing cold in the pool that I've been put off going back tonight! Instead I ordered a Pregnancy Pilates DVD which arrived today. Will try it out and let you all know...!

I went to the NHS antenatal classes last time & was really put off going along to the things at the surestart centre. There's quite a large rough estate near us & it seems that they're the people who are predominantly catered for by the centre. Having come from a quiet Welsh village I find city life challenging at the best of times, let alone when surrounded by loud people who all seem to live in each others pockets! The one or 2 that I did pluck up the courage to speak to seemed perfectly nice & all but they just didn't seem to have much in common with me & I got the impression that you needed to be twice as loud as everyone else if you ever wanted to be heard! From what I've heard of NCT classes, they're kept quite small so I might stand some chance of getting to join in a conversation without being shouted over! I'm really not very outgoing so I think I need something small & structured or I'll get scared & stop going!

Welcome merry! It's nice to have a fellow midwife on board! I so completely agree with you about the early newborn days. They can be incredibly isolating, especially for first time mums (been there!). Your whole life as you know it has been turned on its head, your day consists of feeding, changing, sleeping, repeat. DH will have returned to work after a week or two and will come home to you probably not having brushed your teeth, still in your PJs, dishes in the sink and a cranky babe (as they tend to be in evenings) and they says "WTF did you do all day!?" You are going to need other mums who are going through the same things you are who can just lend a shoulder to offload onto so that you know that you're not alone in the newborn world! Even if you're a midwife, having a class just for the social aspects is so nice. I also did baby massage classes in the early days with DS1 and that was a really nice way to break up the day and meet other mums.

Forgot to mention my details: 28 yo mum of 2 boys (girl on the way). Degree in psychology, also 3rd year apprenticing midwife. Originally from the States, but lived in Notts with DH for 2 years before bringing him back as a US resident .

How stupid am I? I thought it was quiet. Duh! New Fred!

Yes bringon that's exactly how I see myself come next summer, scary! Where will you aim to work when you qualify btw? We have to work in an obstetric unit initially, I did for 2 years. Went out to community over a year ago and I'm loving it. I bet your psychology background comes in handy!

Parenthood is a daunting prospect some days. To all those mums-already on the thread, I will get through it won't I? What was the biggest surprise for you about becoming a mum? Did you all have that instant bond and what about your partners?

Jojo I know what you mean about SureStart, its exactly the thing that made me think of NCT instead. I think its normal to want to join a group that you feel most at home with. I guess it depends on where you live, but you may well find there are other groups set up in your area, relating to organisations like La Leche League (breastfeeding) or more informal on facebook. Also, you could try going along to an NCT sale or baby group (look on fb) and get to meet some of the members and ask them face-to-face about the antenatal classes. They definitely do offer substantial discounts if you find you fall in the bracket. Making the first step is always the hardest x

Hi merry welcome, I totally understand why you felt unsure to hold back, I don't think us have revealed my profession without having felt like we were a small group I knew well, plus it must be hard when people are always asking for advice without realising this is a new experience for you too!
My biggest surprise was just how much love you feel for your child, I know that doesn't seem that strange but I didn't feel an overwhelming love people describe at birth and the first night on my own and tired I was really weepy and thought I didn't love her enough ( I was always told you feel abit blue 4 days later so that was a shock) but as soon as I got home that was it, bang I was in love!
I found the nhs class great for who I met ( not really content ill be honest) and the sure start groups, we went to one 3 times a week, baby massage and little explorers etc and found everyone lovely, I don't know if it was because my area is quite nice in a village but I'd recommend anyone trying it once and seeing who you met/ how it was, things can get expensive if you wanted to be out and about and I did for her stimulation and mine so I found them brilliant

have we lost MrsBri somewhere? Did we leave her on an old bus, under a chair?

Hello again merry you will certainly "get through it"

lore I think mrs is still about on another Fred, but think she's keeping to herself.

I'm not doing any anti-natal groups. I did NHS ones with dd1 until I got very patronised and humiliated by the person running it when I said I wanted to use tens for the birth, and didnt go back after that

Out surestart centres are a godsend around here. And the least snobby of the baby groups. I can't stand snobby, pretensious, sling making, no tv in the house, my baby is better than yours and could speak french at 2 days old, that I came across in the other groups (can you tell I'm normal common as muck? )

Somebody shoot me please.
just had a call telling me there was a space for dd2 at swimming and I put it off, she's been on the waiting list for 7 months, and I put it off!?!
I'm mad aren't i? Is it the pregnancy hormones?

My biggest surprise was how slept deprived I could get and still somehow function. I think by week 4 or 5 I was getting frustrated with only getting 2 hrs of sleep at a time! Also just how MUCH having a baby changes everything. It's amazing how much you just don't know that you don't know (if that makes sense) about having a newborn and being brand-new parents. There's no way someone could explain or try to prepare you for what's ahead- it's just incomprehensible until you actually have a baby.

Merry since I'm studying to be a CPM (certified professional midwife) in the states, I will not have hospital privileges. CPMs are only certified for homebirth or birth center births. I still have about a year left of apprenticing (currently taking a break to be pregnant and a new mum for a while) to accomplish all of my skills and numbers, but after that I'm planning on opening my own private practice with a small amount of clients. I'm looking to start being on-call and working with a midwife again around this time next year! I love that you work in the community. I loved my community midwife when I was pregnant with DS1 in Notts. Are you doing homebirths or mostly prenatal care?