Today I have CPR to a stranger

[Summer135]

One of the worst experiences of my life. It didn't end well but we did everything we could and acted fast. I can't stop thinking about it and what he looked like lying there. I don't know how to feel. I'm having a gin and trying not to over think things. I just happened to be a walker passing by.

First response team are amazing people. I don't know how they do their jobs daily but they are superhero's without the capes.

It's weird how you quickly become part of a situation you never thought you would be in and then it doesn't end well and after you just have walk off and carry on.

I know I'm not the first and definitely not the last to help someone. It's definitely worth googling first aid if you have no idea how to do it. I'm lucky enough to be trained, however in that situation it really puts you to the test.

I don't know how I feel tonight but needed to write it down!!!!

You are such an amazing person OP. Well done for even trying. Please try and get a debrief, it does help I promise. I’ve never had to give cpr, but have twice been involved in random first aid situations and being able to talk will help you.

Be kind to yourself and I’m sure the persons family are thinking of you and are so pleased you tired. Gentle hugs.

This happened to me once on public transport and I was so grateful when the paramedics arrived.
You definitely deserve that gin.
Even though it wasn’t a successful outcome, you gave your patient a chance and that’s huge.

@madcatgirl do you mind me asking where / how did you get a de-brief?

My friend is a consultant and let me just ramble at her. Ask your gp if they can point you on the direction of help. Xx

@Madcatgirl thank you. Most of the time it’s ok then it comes and bites me on the bum.

Please try and speak to someone who understands what you’ve done. I hope you have a peaceful weekend x

Thank you,

Well done , I have CPR training many times ( as I was a mental health nurse ) have never had to put it in practice thankfully ,I remember the trainer saying CPR is rarely successful on its own it you did your best

I too have given unsuccessful CPR, OP. It was a few years back, but I still feel somehow responsible, even though the pathologist noted serious heart disease. I think first aiders should have more support.

Thank you so much for all the supportive comments.

It's as if my mind has tried to blank it out but today and this evening it's just flooding back. I know we did all we could. Images of it all keep coming into my mind.

I'm sure it will take some time.

Thank you all xx