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Original poster

Advice needed on whether I should use a name my sister already wanted....

51 replies

flessica · 19/10/2009 22:11

I am 20 weeks pregnant and have just found out its a girl! As I already have four boys, I am in complete shock!!!

Here's the thing - my sister is 21, no children but in a serious relationship (probably soon to be engaged!) and said about a year ago that she thinks Evie May is the best name for a girl ever and really wants it.

When I got pregnant this time, I overhead someone calling 'Eva!' to someone else and instantly fell in love with it. It took me a while to put the two together and realise that, as we are a close family and see a lot of each other, if I had an Eva (probably Eva Grace), she wouldn't be able to have her Evie May.

I mentioned it to her as a hypothetical name and she said in mock horror 'Please don't steal my name!' but I'm not sure how serious she was. And I hadn't given it much thought until today because I was sure I was having a boy.

Added to this, I currently have no other girl's names that I like.

So, do I keep Eva Grace in the mix now I know I'm having a girl? (I'm having a girl! )

Or do I leave it for the sake of a possible Evie May in my sister's future (bearing in mind she may not have children or only have boys or have gone off the name by the time she is pregnant in the future)?

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ramonaquimby · 19/10/2009 22:14

plenty of other names out there (Eva/Eve is v popular at the moment) I wouldn't do it to a sister

defineme · 19/10/2009 22:15

I'd talk to her seriously - and tbh if she's a good sister she'll get over it otoh if she says please don't and you're a good sister...

Love Eva btw, but that's not helpful is it!

janeite · 19/10/2009 22:16

Talk to her and see what she thinks. If she's still insistent that it's 'her' name, I think you should find another name - she said it first.

Littlefish · 19/10/2009 22:18

I think you should choose another name. Whether or not she has children in the near future, I think it would cause problems between you if you do it.

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 19/10/2009 22:20

I think since this name means more to her than it does to you, you should do the decent thing and leave it for her.

ja9 · 19/10/2009 22:21

it's hers....

ramonaquimby · 19/10/2009 22:23

but Eva and Grace are 2 widely popular names for babies at the moment. surely you must like other names?!?!

CornishKK · 19/10/2009 22:24

Choose another name.

She's already tried to tell you that in a nice way, when she jokingly said "don't steal my name" my guess would be she meant it.

ten10 · 19/10/2009 22:27

have you considered Ava instead?

ScummyMummy · 19/10/2009 22:30

Don't do it! Sisters rock and shouldn't have their future children's names stolen.

jellybeans · 19/10/2009 22:30

I would let her keep it for her potential DD. I liked a name from being a child for a girl and used it on DD1.

shonaspurtle · 19/10/2009 22:33

I think you ask her again and make it clear that if she says no then you'll choose something else.

Tbh, she will almost certainly have changed her mind by the time she has your (hypothetical) niece so I think it's worth a second ask.

Spidermama · 19/10/2009 22:34

My SIL is still annoyed and upset with her sister who 'stole' her girl's name and the girl in question is now 9 or so.

So if you can think of another, I would.

MadBadAndWieldingAnAxe · 19/10/2009 22:38

There are so many lovely names out there. Find another.

skybright · 19/10/2009 22:54

Don't do it,it is really popular just now anyway,loads of people i know have all had variations of Eve,Eva,Ella,Ellie. All nice names but your little girl may well be one of two or three is her class.

reservejudgement · 19/10/2009 23:16

oh wow, congratulations! ( I have 4 boys too!) for you!
Am tempted to say after 4 boys, you should call your girl whatever you like but I am still a bit upset that SIL inadvertently stole my girls name and I don't even have a girl.
Having said that, my dsis and one of my cousins have the same name and my db and another cousin have the same name, we just call them John M and John H!

crankytwaaaaaahhhhnky · 19/10/2009 23:40

God I have this same problem.
Mentioned to sis only boys name dh & I like. 'Tis only one she likes. I think I'm having a girl though.
No help, sorry.

PurplePoppy · 20/10/2009 07:28

Don't do it. I think she will mind. There are plenty of other lovely names.

savoycabbage · 20/10/2009 07:34

I usually think that people should call their babies what they want to call them and this is the first time I have ever said "don't do it".

They are both really, really popular names too.

onadietcokebreak · 20/10/2009 07:36

Its your sister....dont do it.

saltyseadog · 20/10/2009 07:38

Don't do it - so many other lovely girls' names to choose from. I wouldn't steal a good friend's name either.

TwentiethCenturyHeffa · 20/10/2009 07:56

In this case, I wouldn't do it. There are loads of other names out there so I'm sure you'd be able to find something else you like.

piscesmoon · 20/10/2009 08:06

Don't do it! I have never had the chance to use a girls name and there are masses of lovely ones. Infant classes will be crammed with Evie's (and all variations) in 4/5 yrs time and many of those will have May as the second name. Why upset your sister?

pippel · 20/10/2009 08:27

dont do it my sister has her heart set on George for a boy and if I had a ds (I dont I have 2 dds)and used it she would never forgive me. In fact both times Ive been pregnant shes told me if I used it she would never speak to me again.

Tambajam · 20/10/2009 08:30

I think you have to find another name. She mentioned it a while ago. It's not like she said it after the fact.

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