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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

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Original poster

Help me, I have baby name regret

58 replies

Lostandanxious · 02/06/2025 21:23

Can you help me please?
I have baby name regret. I have named my baby ruby and the other name i had in mind was kate which I now think I should have gone with. We gave her the middle name kate in case she would like to use it down the line, but sure why did we even have that thinking which makes me think we made the wrong choice? We have registered her name and I am certain it can't be changed in ireland once registered as its the first name. She is 7 weeks and we have received gifts with her name on, and basically everyone knows her name now and would come across so weird and unusal of me to cha ge it. My partner is happy with the name. Should I just change it and deal with the weirdness now or just try get over my anxiety about this???

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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LivingTheDreamish · 12/10/2025 23:41

Ruby Kate is a lovely name! I always have great sympathy for name regret dilemmas but since you are leaning towards Kate, and she’s already called Kate, and your husband won’t budge, I would just let it be. See if you settle into Ruby because it’s a good name. And if it remains an issue you can easily revert to using Kate as her given name - no formalities required.

Oops just read your update! I’m sure you’ll settle on the perfect name OP.

Original poster

Lostandanxious · 12/10/2025 23:48

Feb85 · 12/10/2025 23:33

Hi Op just to let you know you can change your little girls first name in Ireland as long as you can show proof you have been using her new name ie: if you choose to have her baptised use the new name on her Baptismal Cert.also register with a GP. You have to get a form signed also from a Commissioner of Oates declaring the name change. Our local Birth Registration Office gave me all info needed and sent me the form I presume it is the same process throughout Ireland.

@feb85 thank you
Yes, of course we already christened her! But I do think i could get the name proof elsewhere eg GP, PHN even is what the lady on register said.

Did you change your DC name?

OP posts:

Original poster

Lostandanxious · 12/10/2025 23:52

Moonandstars2118 · 05/06/2025 01:13

I’m biased as I have a Ruby who is also 7 weeks! And she already goes by lots of nicknames.
With my older DC I often use their middle name when I talk to them. And they also answer to several different nicknames.
So if you want to call her Kate yourself it wouldn’t be weird and she’d probably end up answering to both.
Be kind to yourself, it’s a huge adjustment having children and I know the anxious feeling of second guessing everything. Sending hugs.

@Moonandstars2118 Thank you. Where in the world are you? What nn do you use for your Ruby?

OP posts:

Original poster

Lostandanxious · 12/10/2025 23:56

@feb85 sorry I should have said that typically, we already christened her!!

OP posts:

Dontworrybesnappy · 13/10/2025 00:07

I love the ruby name. Ruby is the name of a pet I loved.

Moonandstars2118 · 13/10/2025 00:17

Lostandanxious · 12/10/2025 23:52

@Moonandstars2118 Thank you. Where in the world are you? What nn do you use for your Ruby?

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I’ve DMd you x

novocaine4thesoul · 13/10/2025 01:01

I've got a Ruby, I sometimes call her Rube or Rubes as she is an adult now. I never had a moment of difficulty in bringing her up iro of people "not getting the name, mis-pelling, mis-pronouncing ". It was clear that that was her name and it wasn't short for anything. It was easy for her to write in school, and she was known as Ruby and liked it, and still does. She has a really lovely more unusual middle name (not posted for outing), which she could have taken if she had wanted to, but never did. Our family often takes middle names. It is very hard in those first few weeks I know, but you have given her a lovely name, that will stand in good stead really it will xx

Feb85 · 13/10/2025 22:50

Lostandanxious · 12/10/2025 23:48

@feb85 thank you
Yes, of course we already christened her! But I do think i could get the name proof elsewhere eg GP, PHN even is what the lady on register said.

Did you change your DC name?

Show quote history

Yes exactly any official proof that you can show to be using your preferred name for your DD will work is what we were told. We are in the process of doing it and hope to get it finalised this week. Ours is a different scenario than yours however it is the exact same process as it is still a change of name on Birth Certificate. We are not changing DS name as such but getting rid of the fada in his name as we didn’t realise this makes a big difference to the pronunciation of his name especially in some dialects which we have came across and people very irritatingly keep pointing out his name is pronounced different to what we call our DS so rather than our DS having to listen and explain this all his life we want to correct it now.

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