Holy moly we have a problem

[NCBabyNames]

Slight backstory. I was pregnant last year, due end of Jan 22, but sadly had to TFMR at 27 weeks. He was called Sebastian.

We have a 2.5 yo DD called Matilda.

Anyway - I'm now pregnant again, woohoo. I don't know the sex yet, but if it's a boy of course we can't use Sebastian.

DP randomly showed me a list of names he'd been saving, in the case that it's a boy. Please remember - he LOVED the name Sebastian.

This is his new list.

Hunter
Maverick
Neo
Storm
Axel
Kaleo
Kato
Brody
Cruze
Flint

What the actual... I mean what the actual!!!! Kaleo?? Cruze?!

I asked him where these had come from (after saying ummmm no...) and he has said he was trying to find names very unlike Sebastian.

For reference, this is the list I have been keeping:

Rupert
Alexander
Dominic (top choice) (Dom)
Finn
William (Bill / Billy)
Max
Frederic (Fred / Freddy)
Arlo
Rufus
Ralph
Hugh
Alexis
Hugo

HOW ARE WE ON SUCH DIFFERENT PAGES?!

Please pray that we have another girl.

The OPs husband has no actual names on list.

Axel is definitely a 'real name', I'd have said it was fairly mainstream.

Some of the OPs list aren't really anything like Sebastian - Finn in particular seems more like her DHs list.

Maybe use one of the names from his list as a middle name. I looked at the list and thought this is a list where someone is trying to use names that sound very strong. Perhaps that's understandable if he's relating naming the baby to what very sadly happened with your first son.

Sorry for your loss. Sebastian is a gorgeous name.

What about Leo? Goes well with your surname, similar to Kaleo but a lot less random, would go on your list without looking out of place?

No. It very clearly says "Forget him not"

It's about the wonder of having a little boy.

Now I know your surname I really want to suggest Todd. Sorry!

I'm so sorry for your loss and I can see why he wants those sort of action hero names, maybe it's his way of trying to protect your child, by giving them a tough guy name. There's got to be better strong names than Flint though!

Op has he had councilling to help him talk through his feelings about Sebastian? It might be worth considering. It's known that after a babies death a lot of the focus is on the Mum. With the Dad left to deal with it.

With a surname that ends in a y / ie sound I'd avoid any first names that end in the same or they end up sounding rather like a cartoon character.

I think many of his names are from film and TV characters. Does he watch a lot of film and TV? It's the worst list I've seen on here.

I think you have picked up the list he was keeping for when he gets a puppy. They are great names for a German Shepherd.
Actually I do like Cruz, good solid Catholic name there.

I'm so sorry for your loss of Sebastian 💐

Congratulations, though, on your pregnancy.
Your dh I think is still dealing with unprocessed grief and I think trying to honour Sebastian by keeping his name unique within your family. So it's not a matter of personal tastes here per se...

There must be some middle ground here. Can you share with us a couple of less-traditional names that you like?

I wonder if a nature or old English or Gaelic name would fit the bill...

River
Hudson
Arden
Ash
Aspen
Rowan
Bram
Ellery
Adam
Eric
Evan
Finlay / Finn
Guy
Lennox
Bryn
Carey
Cliff
Morven
Ronan
Brennan
Caelan
Cole
Fergus
Flynn
Kennedy
Kieran
Leslie
Patrick
Rory
Taran
Torin

I agree with the suggestion of Flynn being a compromise on Flint/Finn.

I also wonder if he would get on board with Leo, Theo, Luca? Little bit more modern but not as out there, and very different to Sebastian. Alexander nn Xander I like too. Reuben rather than Rupert, or maybe something a bit quirky like Dexter (not sure if that's too out there from your list!).

I know all of you are just desperate for an update so here we are...

It's a boy!!! I'm delighted. I didn't know how I'd feel what with having Seb and not wanting to replace him... but I'm overjoyed.

Anyway.

Kinder app came to our rescue (thank you to the pp who mentioned using an app!!)

We have six names that we both like and they're not as random as I thought!

Elliott (or Elliot...... tbd. Not sure it makes a difference?!)
Tristan

^^ these are our top two. Only issue is meanings, which I'm not sure I care about, but Elliott means 'the lord is my god' apparently and I don't feel that way (!), although Wiki also offers 'With Strength and Right' or 'Bravely and Truly' or 'Boldly and Rightly'.
Also it's a Scottish / Irish maybe name - and I was born in Scotland and DP has Irish heritage. So there's that.
And then Tristan - means sad or melancholy... which I don't really want!! But my favourite film/book is Stardust so that's a great link too.

So not sure if I care about the meanings.

Other matches are:

Hugo (vaaiiirrrr posh, maybe too posh)
Ethan (Hawke)
Seth (I think is a bit too much like Seb? And reminds me of Emmerdale.)
Theodore (Alvin Simon...)

Anyway. There we go.

Main thing is everything looks as it should, no concerns, and that's all that actually matters 💙

Congrats!

Hugo is a top 50 name right now, it's really not posh anymore.

That would be my choice but all of your options are good.

I'm glad you've managed to talk your husband down. With his original choices, anyone would think he was the one with the pregnancy hormones!

That's lovely, OP. I'm so glad you're feeling overjoyed with the news!

I like Elliot/t best from your list of possibles.

Congratulations 💐

Tristan would be good. Read some James Herriot because Tristan always seemed terrific fun.

Congratulations! You can't really go wrong with any of those.

Congratulations!

Fwiw I think the "Tristan" = "sad" is a Norman French post hoc rationalisation. The original meaning is lost with the pre-Celtic languages. I like to think it means "trustworthy, reliable".

Congratulations! I adore Elliot!