Help! Picked my name but a friend may use it first!

[yummymango]

I have chosen Violet for DD2. I had my heart set on it, we don't know any Violets and it goes nicely with our surname. I picked it even before I was pregnant! Unfortunately I have found out that someone I know quite well is considering Violet for her newborn DD. I am gutted! I have searched through hundreds of names but can't find anything I like as much. Any suggestions please? I don't want something popular and I don't generally like masculine names or names ending in ella or illy. Thank you!

Viola. Lovely, similar, and from Shakespeare.

I would drop it into the convo that you have picked violet Ms then ask them what they are thinking of so your basically making them aware not to pick it

Use Violet. Explain that your heart is set on if and that you will still use it if she does.

Put the ball in her court. If she uses it in the full knowledge that you will, she cannot complain.

I'd just use it, rather than use a name I didn't want.

I have mentioned it to her since I found out she is considering it. But I don't own it, so what can I do? I don't think I could call my baby Violet if she uses it though, it takes something away from it for me. I was thinking if I could have a couple of backups that I liked as much maybe I wouldn't mind so much :)

Just use it. Two of my cousins called their ds the same first AND middle name and two friends have same name ds a week apart in age.

I'd be pissed if someone took my name but l'd definitely want to call my dc the name l loved.

There's no copywright on names. Friends independetly picked the same first and second names which we used for our DD1! Our DD is older than theirs so we went first and were unaware of our friends preferences. When we found out we all agreed that we had excellent taste and that it wouldn't matter to anyone if the girls shared names. So we both have beautiful DDs with the same name. Everyone is happy.

I have a feeling there will be a lot of little Violet's running round, that and Penelope seems to be everywhere.

Just use it!!
It's a beautiful name and your heart is set in it.
We've got about 3567854 Alices in my family, a few johns... More than one Charlotte. It really doesn't natter!!

I didn't realise Violet was getting popular, I don't know any. Nor any Penelopes for that matter. I guess maybe it depends where you live.

lastqueen - The problem is I think I have a fairly unusual name, and have only really met one other person with the same name so I really struggle with popular names. Maybe it sounds silly I guess it is really.

Realistically they aren't going to spend their whole lives together though!
Is it a friend you spend a lot of time with?
If feel differently if it was a sister/best friend but someone you know "quite well" id not worry

Actually no, it's someone I grew up with but they live over 200 miles away, the chances of them ever actually spending time together are very slim. Now you're making me think I'm being a bit daft! ;-)

Go for it ....

Violet is definitely quite popular at the moment.

Viola
Ianthe
Ivy
Iris
Fleur

Oh how frustrating, of all the names in the world, she has to like the name you do.
If it were me I choose a different name if she does opt for Violet but this isn't about me.
If you really like the name then technically there's nothing stopping you from using it. No one owns name, plus. Violet is now becoming very popular so the chances are she'll be one of many Violets in the class.
There's no hard or fast rule here.

Violet is crazy popular at the moment. I work with kids and I know about 12 Violets.

Ianthe is a lovely name :)

TBH when I hear Violet I either think of (a) parma violets or (b) Violet Beauregarde from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Go for it, Violet's such a pretty name that it's understandable someone else likes it too.

violet massively popular round here too, I had been considering it for my soon to be born DD2 but know of at least 2 that have been born just this year my DD1 has a popular name and there are 3 of them in her year at school which means she has to be referred to by surname initial too which annoys her no end bless her!

That is annoying!
Though I think if they live so far away and won't see each other that much I'd still use it if it was the one name I had my heart set on.

Alternatives:
Beatrice
Florence
Martha
Scarlett
Anya
Lydia
Jemima
Athena
Thea
Francesca
Rosalie
Coraline
Harriet
Louisa
Juliette
Arabella

A very good (but not local) friend was pg at the same time as me, due within days of each other. She knew she was having a girl, we kept it as a surprise. We (me & DP) picked out 1 boy & 1 girl name very early on in the pregnancy. I saw her at about 7mo pregnant and she told me the name she'd chosen and it was our girl's name! (one of those "getting more popular" names)

I was torn, but decided that although we see each other several times a year it wasn't too much of a problem if our kids shared a name.

Then had a hormonal change of heart in the week before my due date to a totally different name (not because they had chosen the same name, but I can't deny that it had some influence).

Then I had a boy anyway.

Sorry, not that helpful. But I do think that if you live that far apart then having 2 kids with the same name (even a slightly uncommon one) isn't the end of the world. And it's not really surprising that friends sometimes have similar tastes in things.

Use the name. Friendships don't usually last forever but your time with your DD will.

You don't even describe the other pg mum as a friend, just someone you know quite well. I wouldn't spend another second worrying about it.