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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

TO BE SO MAD AT DH

42 replies

ilovesprouts · 11/03/2010 19:40

hi my dh and i have gone through a bit of a bad patch atm ,ds2 had a mri scan today last night dh tells me oh im going to sumerset for a break knowing full well his sons going for his mri scan, no fone call to ask how ds is im so mad ,i feel like telling him not to come back

OP posts:
ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 11/03/2010 19:48

That's shitty Does he realise how worried you are? Why isn't he worried? Insensitive twat

kaffers · 11/03/2010 19:50

It doesn't sound like YABU - I would be really upset too - perhaps you should write down how you feel now so that when you speak to him you can express it in a cool way? (In similar situations with my DH I've got so angry that I've shouted down the phone at him and then really wished I'd been cool and collected instead to make my point better).

shakingmyfattybumbum · 11/03/2010 19:50

He is crap. Hope DS is ok. Been there myself with MRI scan and child thing recently so I know how you feel.

harimosmummy · 11/03/2010 19:52

Goodness, you are not being unreasonable.

I'd be as mad as hell - especially no phone call.

Hope your DS is OK.

kaffers · 11/03/2010 19:53

Sorry I meant to say as well - really hope your DS is ok.

AliGrylls · 11/03/2010 20:00

Absolutely YANBU.

MudandRoses · 11/03/2010 20:15

YANBU and you've every right to be angry. But if you want something constructive to come out of the situation, you have to sit down and have a Proper Talk to him. Find out his side of the story. and explain yours, calmly. Stick to your guns, he's out of order.

heQet · 11/03/2010 20:18

Do you think he is running away (I don't mean forever of course!) I mean do you think he's scared? His son's having an MRI and he can't deal with it so he's bailing (temporarily)

PavlovtheCat · 11/03/2010 20:18

He's a twat. Do you want him to not come back? If so, tell him not bother for while, tell him to extend his 'break' for a longer period, give you some time to think.

Hope your DS is ok. And you too.

Pozzled · 11/03/2010 20:40

I thought the same as heQet- he could be scared about the scan results, and trying to pretend it isn't happening. Very cowardly to leave you to it either way though, he definitely needs a thorough talk about what it means to be a father. What;s he like usually- has he done this kind of thing before?

Stripycat23 · 11/03/2010 20:42

He's a father and he should act like one. His son is the most important thing not a "break" for himself. Selfish, selfish. How nice he supported his family - not. Was it an off-the-cuff thing or did he have something planned?

Hope DS is ok too.

PavlovtheCat · 11/03/2010 20:47

He should bloody grow a pair, even if he is scared. ilovesprouts has not got that option. And I doubt would take it right now when her son needs her even if she had that option.

Original poster
ilovesprouts · 11/03/2010 20:56

hes from somerset and says hes homesick ,hes lived up here for 5 years now ,maybe i will ask him to stay bit longer .i cant cope whith his temper/bad moods etc hes always blowing up for no reson,hes got a very bad anger too ,our ds has sn ,and i have a pg dd at home ,also hes gone to see his fam who threw us out of his mums house ,and barred us from his step dads funeral

OP posts:
OrmRenewed · 11/03/2010 21:04

Hope all goes well with the MRI.

To be positive, would you be better off with his 'support' if that's what he's like? Use this time to find out how you can cope without him and take it from there.

I do wonder if he is struggling with the situation though. Not that you have that choice

Your ILs sound awful.

Mumcentreplus · 11/03/2010 21:17

..sorry all this is happening ilove be strong...I think you need to have a real long talk with your DH..but for now just try to concerntrate on your DS..

Original poster
ilovesprouts · 12/03/2010 08:01

hi all is well this morning ,me dd and ds had a relly early nite ,i even had the whole bed to my self yay!! and no dh snoring he s a very good hands on dad ,but just cant belive hes gone on a break still no fone call tho fones off [mad]

OP posts:
SixtyFootDoll · 12/03/2010 08:05

He is so out of order.
Homesick? For his family?
Errrr you and the DCS are his family.
What a nob.

OneFatArse · 12/03/2010 10:48

He sounds like a cock.

Original poster
ilovesprouts · 12/03/2010 14:44

only the youngest dc is his ,

OP posts:
giveitago · 12/03/2010 15:04

Tell him not to come back. Arsehole.

OrmRenewed · 12/03/2010 15:06

When is the scan ilovesprouts? Fingers crossed for you.

Original poster
ilovesprouts · 12/03/2010 15:13

ds scan was yesterday ,not sure when the results are back

OP posts:
PavlovtheCat · 12/03/2010 15:38

Has he phoned you yet?

Original poster
ilovesprouts · 12/03/2010 19:57

no no phone call i used my last £5 to top up my fone ,rang his mate who hes whith and i said why you not called me and he said ive only got £20 to last him till sat had a row we him and told him not to come back ,rang back 2 mins later and he told his mate he dont wanna talk to me at all he gets all the money apart from fam and dctc

OP posts:
PavlovtheCat · 12/03/2010 21:07

He sounds like an arse. Really. Do you love him? Do you want him to come back? Is this a break as in a few days away, or is it a 'proper' break? As in, break from the family.

I am so sorry you are having to deal with an arse of a partner as well as worrying about your son's health.

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