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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this is a bit much?

66 replies

TeenyTinyTorya · 25/10/2008 21:28

I was in a shop yesterday where the shopkeeper commented on a little toddler eating crisps. Her mum then said that she gives her dd a packet of crisps in every shop, otherwise she can't concentrate on her shopping. She then complained that the kid never eats her dinner. I was a bit as her dd was about 2.

Please do not flame me or jump on me squealing "judge not unless you are a perfect mother". I'm just interested to know the ratio of people who think this is ok versus those who disapprove.

OP posts:
Original poster
TeenyTinyTorya · 25/10/2008 21:29

I did say shop a lot in that OP, didn't I?

OP posts:
differentWitch · 25/10/2008 21:29

I hate it when people eat in shops anyway, especially if there are clothes on sale.

SqueakyPop · 25/10/2008 21:29

Shame to have her dd in nosebag of crisps.

SharkyandGeorge · 25/10/2008 21:30

Crisps for a toddler, ok.

Crisps in every shop not so ok, surely she can think of something else to keep her DD entertained - a book to look at maybe?

ToThrottleABlackBird · 25/10/2008 21:31

Maybe she meant 'everytime she went shopping' I know we have to give dd something to eat whilst food shopping and she is only 14months.

KatieDD · 25/10/2008 21:31

Honestly the older you get the less you care about other peoples strange eating habits, life is way too short.
I hope you were buying yourself something nice in the shop.

Cupofteaplease · 25/10/2008 21:31

Sometimes, when people comment on my parenting (as the shopkeeper did in the OP), I say any old waffle as I feel flustered or embarrassed. IM humble O, it is highly unlikely that the little girl eats crisps in every single shop.

MurderousMarla · 25/10/2008 21:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

beansmum · 25/10/2008 21:31

Maybe she doesn't shop very often. I probably wouldn't give a 2yo crisps but I wouldn't disapprove of someone else doing it, I probably wouldn't even notice.

differentWitch · 25/10/2008 21:33

It's entirely possible that every shop is right- I have seen multi-packs of crisps being opened as they walk in the door with 1 child and only half the pack left going out- so that's 3 packs in one sitting.

nooOOOoonki · 25/10/2008 21:33

I think a whole pack of crisps is too much for a toddler, poor kid will be another obesity stat in 5 years time.

Tippychick · 25/10/2008 21:34

I give my 2yo food to get round the shops, sure. I'm not trying on frocks, I'm a Lp and she has to come with me to the supermarket. Sometimes she gets narky. I feed her
Don't see the problem?

CapricaSpoox · 25/10/2008 21:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
TeenyTinyTorya · 25/10/2008 21:46

Every shop is what she said, not every shopping day, and the shopkeeper wasn't commenting on her parenting, she was laughing at the little girl because she was playing with the crisp packet.

I didn't buy anything nice unfortunately Katie, I haven't got any money lol!

I'm interested at the comments about it being hard to shop with a toddler - mine loves going out, and has a "friend" in every shop who he always talks to - we live in a small town and he's quite a character

Thank you all for the thoughtful responses

OP posts:
Tippychick · 25/10/2008 21:52

You're lucky TTT, my DD has a very low boredom threshold and going everywhere by bus means we have to shop most days to be able to carry it home. So I do regularly give her a banana, crisps sometimes, breadsticks etc to get home in one piece. Better that than shouty mummy I feel.

I do have a line I won't cross re shoplifting though, I will open bags of fruit or crisps but I won't give her anything that has to be weighed. Does that mean I'm let off?

CapricaSpoox · 25/10/2008 21:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
TeenyTinyTorya · 25/10/2008 21:56

Oh buses are a nightmare! I can't get ds to sit still on one if I have to fold down the pushchair, but moving around on the bus makes him throw up. I'm very grateful that my town is within walking distance.

I can't talk about the shoplifting, as my mum took me out of Woolworths when I was 18mths old only to find that my pushchair was full of small toys that I had been nicking as we went along

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meandmyjoe · 25/10/2008 22:13

I have to give my ds something to eat when we go shopping to keep him occupied and not wanting to get out and run around (he's 14 months) we give him apple slices or crackers though so not quite as unhealthy. I have no problem with her giving her toddler crisps but I agree with throttle, maybe she meant one bag per trip as one bag per shop weems like a lot for a little child to manage and the salt content must be too high.

sunnygirl1412 · 25/10/2008 22:42

I got really annoyed in the supermarket once, when I saw a mother take bananas from the fruit and veg section and give one to her daughter before paying for it. It wasn't in a barcoded bag, but was weighed at the checkout, btw.

The till staff were equally aghast when I told them - and I confess that I did confront her about it - and she told me that she'd paid for it because the skin went back in the bag - and got stroppy when I asked her how the scales had weighed the banana that was in her dd's stomach!

I never got into the giving snacks in the supermarket thing, but I can understand how some parents do - I think I was just lucky that my kids didn't kick off too much. If giving your child a snack in Tesco's helps you get the weekly shop done without losing what remains of your sanity, then do it. Just make it something you've taken in with you, or something from a barcoded packet so that you pay for it at the end.

wessexghoul · 25/10/2008 22:44

Well, it isn't something I'd do.

Which makes it totally bloody unreasonable, I'd say .

Ronaldinhio · 25/10/2008 22:48

mumsnet is full of excellent tips I had never considered the bag of crisps route until now..........

CapricaSpoox · 25/10/2008 22:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Flum · 25/10/2008 23:03

Yeah kids eating in the street is such poor manners anyway. Can't bear seeing toddlers in pushchairs covered in raisins and crumbs and ricecakes.

Feed them then go out.

In our family the only thing that you can eat in the street is an icecream. Its the same rule my mum had.

Loads of my friends seem to shove food at their toddlers constantly, everytime they twitch or bleat about something!

Flum · 25/10/2008 23:05

Don't object as much to on a bus. Its the mess they drop around behind them.

Having said that I would not shop with hungry kids - nightmare. I can't shop hungry either. My DH calls it shopping with a loaded gun as you just buy rubbish.

Original poster
TeenyTinyTorya · 25/10/2008 23:14

Caprica I have huge sympathy for you- I took ds to Glasgow Fort recently - he slept through the 40 minute bus journey, and the driver was incredibly helpful, lifted my buggy into the luggage rack for me, and let me get on and off safely. So far so good, but this is why I hate buses though:

On the way home I decided to get a different bus cos it was quicker - only 10 mins. Ds was by this time wide awake and bouncing, and my buggy was loaded with bags. I ran for the bus, and the driver stopped grudgingly, told me I would have to fold the buggy and then sat and watched me. I had to stand ds at the side of the road while I struggled to fold the buggy and hold all the bags - eventually a nice lady came and took ds so we could get on the bus. Then the driver shut the door on my leg as I was getting on,
and drove away while I was trying to settle ds in a seat. When we got off, luckily the lady helped me with ds again because the driver was no bloody use.

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