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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this is a bit much?

66 replies

TeenyTinyTorya · 25/10/2008 21:28

I was in a shop yesterday where the shopkeeper commented on a little toddler eating crisps. Her mum then said that she gives her dd a packet of crisps in every shop, otherwise she can't concentrate on her shopping. She then complained that the kid never eats her dinner. I was a bit as her dd was about 2.

Please do not flame me or jump on me squealing "judge not unless you are a perfect mother". I'm just interested to know the ratio of people who think this is ok versus those who disapprove.

OP posts:
lulabellarama · 25/10/2008 23:16

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Tortington · 25/10/2008 23:18

i fed my nephew billy bear and cheese. as i was going round tesco last week. i thought of mn

sunnygirl1412 · 25/10/2008 23:21

She took something without paying for it - not a terribly good example for her child, imo. If I took food and ate it in the supermarket without paying, I'd be a shoplifter.

lulabellarama · 25/10/2008 23:23

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Tortington · 25/10/2008 23:23

shock

horror

sunnygirl1412 · 25/10/2008 23:37

Well, lulu - you now 'know' me, and I have never eaten a grape or two out of the bag - until I have paid for it.

And what does it have to do with me? Well, the supermarkets don't want to pay for the shoplifters, so they put a mark-up on the goods in their stores to cover these losses - so we are all paying for the stuff that is nicked. You may be happy to do this, I am not.

lulabellarama · 25/10/2008 23:42

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

ToThrottleABlackBird · 26/10/2008 00:35

Bloody hell, what is it with people tonight? So she gave her a banana, so fecking what!! No doubt if she was screaming her head off you would be tutting and shaking your head.
There are more important things to get worked up over. How proud you would of felt if the shop decided to get her arrested in front of her little one for doing the crime of the century!

nappyaddict · 26/10/2008 01:30

perhaps she was saying it to shut him up? i have often told annoying home insurace people i live in a cardboard box

CapricaSpoox · 26/10/2008 07:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cory · 26/10/2008 09:11

I do often wonder about the banana thing. My SIL used to do this every time with her PFB. Yet if a 10yo went down to the shop and helped themselves to sweets of a similar value, the shop would call the police. They wouldn't be saying 'aw, it's nothing to worry about'. And you wouldn't defend the child if he was yours either, would you?

So is there something about mothers that means society doesn't count them as responsible individuals in the same way as they would a junior school child?

Seems like double standards to me.

Is it that difficult to remember to bring a snack? After all, the need is not exactly hard to foresee, is it?

cory · 26/10/2008 09:14

And I will happily get my judgeypants out for any mum who lets her toddler eat crisps on a daily basis (even if it's only one bag per trip, not one per shop). The high salt content is really bad for small kidneys and getting used to salty flavours this young is unlikely to help her blood pressure later in life.

forevercleaningwithmybesoms · 26/10/2008 09:17

Have to confess mine were crips eaters in the shops, or choccy buttons - anything for a bit of peace to concentrate on my shopping.

I would break off the end of the french bread if doing a food shop, but would never do the eating grapes thing that I have seen loads of people doing.

nooOOOoonki · 26/10/2008 09:25

lol and confronting the 'stealing' banana,
sunny -

please come to my neighbourhood and I'll let you loose... the drug dealers and asbo boys just need someone to make them see the error of their ways!

nooOOOoonki · 26/10/2008 09:29

flum eating in the street is such poor manners - that is the funniest thing I have read for ages on MN,

why oh why is that 'poor manners' maybe you could come round and help sunny in sorted out my neighbourhood - you may have a few worse manners than EATING in the STREET

zookeeper · 26/10/2008 09:33

sunnygirl can't believe you confronted another mum over a banana. Get a life

nappyaddict · 26/10/2008 09:40

I'm not sure the driver's are allowed to get off the bus are they?

BelleEpoque · 26/10/2008 10:04

Yeah eating crisps regularly can't be good for a todddler. Though maybe the rest of her diet is good. People nowdays would be shocked if you smoked near a child, but giving kids a poor diet is just as bad for their health.

Bathsheba · 26/10/2008 10:12

I have 2 fairly normal, boisterous little girls of 4.5 and 2. Neither of them have ever needed to eat as we go round a supermarket.

We often factor in "lunch in the cafe" afterwards as a treat (but not every time), or we go just after a mealtime where they have had food and drink.

I have never seen the need to feed children as I go around a shop (otherthan when DD2 was tiny and I had to stop in Tesco and give her a bottle but I think thats different to having to give a child crisps).

nooOOOoonki · 26/10/2008 10:20

what's the harm in them eating around a shop though... I always choose things that I can pay for (preweighed grapes normally)

my two are only 19 months apart and DS1 used to batter DS2 when he was newborn and the only way I could get round was by feeding him.

I do have an issue with the crisps - too much salt/fat for a regular treat for a toddler (or me for that matter)

sunnygirl1412 · 26/10/2008 10:48

Well, I'm going to remove myself from this thread as I've clearly touched a nerve with some people.

In parting, I would just ask how the people who think it's ok to eat a few pence worth of fruit in the supermarket without paying will answer their children when they say:
"Mum, you know you told us you can't take things from the shop without paying - well why are you taking that fruit without paying?" Is there a sum in pounds and pence under which it's OK and over which it's shoplifting/theft?

Original poster
TeenyTinyTorya · 26/10/2008 12:15

NA, there are occasionally drivers who are helpful, but it just pees me off when they are in a foul mood and make your day harder just because they can. I'm not sure if there's a rule about getting out of the seat, I've seen a couple of drivers do it to help wheelchair users get on.

OP posts:
lulumama · 26/10/2008 12:17

sunnygirl, i totally agree with you

if 100s of people eat a few grapes or a banana every time they shop, then prices are forced to go up , and god knows htey are high enough

KatieDD · 26/10/2008 16:16

Dear god I have seen people walk out of Tesco's with TV's, really getting ones knickers in a twist over a banana or a few grapes is a waste of energy.

Tippychick · 27/10/2008 19:51

Wow Flum you are strict. I was also brought up to believe that eating, drinking and smoking in the street were the worse sins ever. Our school had a ban on anyone eating in uniform for some reason. But we're talking about toddlers. Little people that have to eat little and often. If toddlers covered in rice cake crumbs are offensive to you then I reall hope you never meet me and my DD in the street!. I think we leave a trail.......

Plus ( and sorry to harp at you but your post really struck a chord) only ice cream? Never chips out of a cone sat on the pier at the seaside or candy floss at the fair? Never a sandwich on a park bench feeding the ducks? I think some of my best memories involve eating outdoors, thinking back!

Would also like to confirm that the bananas I feed to my DD are the fair trade ones they always pointlessly wrap in plastic, I am not a tea leaf.

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