AIBU to think my husband is unfairly blaming me for his son’s GCSE results?
I would really appreciate some honest opinions because I’m struggling to understand whether I’m being unreasonable here.
My husband has cheated on me multiple times. The most recent incident was the fifth time I’ve discovered him being involved with another woman. This time, she was living in another country, but he was messaging her, sending her money and hiding it all from me.
Throughout our marriage, there has been a lot of lying, gaslighting and emotional turmoil. By the time I discovered this latest betrayal, I was mentally and emotionally exhausted. I was in a really bad place because of everything that had happened.
We also live with his son, my stepson, who was sitting his GCSEs at the time.
Unfortunately, my stepson didn’t pass any of his GCSEs. Not a single subject.
Now my husband is blaming me. He’s saying that I punished his son by not helping him with his schoolwork or being involved enough in his education.
What I find difficult to accept is that, during this period, my husband himself wasn’t putting in the effort to support his son’s education. From my perspective, he seemed to be spending more time and energy hiding his relationship with this other woman than focusing on what was happening at home.
I wasn’t deliberately withholding help from my stepson or trying to punish him. I was simply struggling to cope emotionally with what my husband was putting me through.
I understand that children shouldn’t suffer because of problems between adults, and I genuinely feel sad that my stepson didn’t get the results he needed.
But I also feel that my husband is now placing the responsibility on me rather than acknowledging his own role as a parent.
AIBU to think it’s unfair for my husband to blame me for his son’s GCSE results when I was struggling mentally because of his repeated infidelity?
I’m genuinely interested in hearing different perspectives, even if you think I could have handled things differently.