To stay in my flexible legal job despite being extremely bored / unfulfilled?

[iwanttopaintitblack]

I am a solicitor, qualified for 6 years. I work in litigation / disputes.

I work 9am - 3pm Monday to Thursday (have Fridays off) with an annual salary of about £50K (pre-tax). I take home about £3K after tax per month.

My job is EXTREMELY flexible (primarily because I have worked with my managers for 10 years, as I trained with them). I have two children - 3 and a 5 year old girls. I do all school/nursery drop offs and pick ups, we don't need after school childcare and I can be very present in my children's lives. I am able to attend all school events - it is never an issue and I don't need to ask permission. I can just attend and then make up any hours at a time that suits me. I can work from home all the time if I want to - I didn't go to the office the entirety of the summer holidays!

I am very aware that my job is very suitable for a family life and pays reasonably well. I know how lucky I am and that these jobs are rare, especially in law.

However, I am very bored when I'm working. I have somehow fallen into an area of law that I am not very interested in. I wanted to be a human rights lawyer, and have ended up in something with no soul and unfulfilling (for me).

I've been looking at more fulfilling roles, such as charity or environmental law. However taking such a role (if I was even able to move into that practice area and was offered a job) would likely mean working full-time, less flexibility and generally more stress in terms of after school childcare etc (I am assuming).

I can't decide if I should be pursuing something more fulfilling or just stick where I am, whilst kids are small.

YABU - change jobs to find something that you enjoy - choose FULFILMENT

YANBU - stay in your job as you earn well and it accommodates family life, whilst your kids are so little - choose FLEXIBILITY - if you choose this, do you think working from the office might help with motivation/ enjoyment?

Help me decide, thank you!

I am sort of in a similar situation, unexciting job, but good pay and suits family life. Personally I plan to stick it out at least while kids are in primary but my DH works long hours in a high pressure job so I know he can't pick up the slack if I were to work in a higher presume job. As for working from the office, depends on the atmosphere in there, the people, the commute. I work full time with two days a week in the office and doing want to do anymore days there.

Hey, thank you for your response. Yes, my husband is self-employed / runs his own construction business so he also can't really pick up the slack. Not that I'd want him to anyway, as I like being the primary carer but would also like to do a fulfilling job! I'm leaning towards staying where I am too - not least because I can't face the whole job search and application process!

Stay move when they are older.

I know numerous people who got quite disillusioned with those “meaningful” jobs like charity and human rights.

I set up on my own (also solicitor) and earn double what you do with utter flexibility. You can be smart about it .

If you don't need the extra money, could you perhaps volunteer in the area of law that interests you? Maybe half a day per week or once a fortnight?
You'd get some of the fulfilment and keep the flexibility.

Oh this is a good idea. I could try to do this on my Fridays off and get some experience in that area if I decide to move later.

Amazing, well done. How many PQE were you when you set up on your own? Which practice area? Thank you

Can I ask what area of law you practice please?

im keeping that under my hat. Was not what I was doing before but I pivoted totally and it’s really worked out. Dh was the main earner. He’s not now.

i was 9 years pqe sahm for 7 years set up on my own 2013. Been going since then.

There are quite a few of us lone wolf women on our own solicitors. It’s the way forward. No more creeping round male partners and office politics.

Definitely keep the flexibility. The demands on your time either playdates, extra curriculars etc will only ramp up from now, for the next few years. I have pause my career progression so I can facilitate this, my girls are now years 3 and 6. Once the youngest is year 7 I will restart my career progression, but I know my girls are more important

Perhaps stick it out until youngest starts primary school? I think the danger is that you are missing out on a vital window to increase your seniority and earning power (assuming you are in you 30s or 40s) which will give you options not just as your kids grow but also for when you want to retire. I was in full time (sometimes 4 days a week) work when DS was aged 2 to 14. In that time I became a lot more senior and doubled my annual earnings. In my 50s and with DS now 15 I am able to work much more flexibly as a result and will likely retire earlier than if i'd stayed at the same level when I had DS. I do think fulfilment at work is important and can be successfully balanced with family time if you get organised.

Charity sector is the Wild West. Such a mix of quality/impact, lots of saviour complex types, lots of crap if earnest staff, lots of mega rounds of redundancy, lots of financial mismanagement.

Stick with what you have and volunteer your time/skills?

I would definitely look for a move. You have decades of work to go, life is too short to spend it in a job you already find dull.

Doing all the pick ups is overrated - mine love after school club!

I have paused my career progression too, as didn't (wasn't prepared to make) the time for marketing (whilst still trying to meet chargeable targets) in order to progress. Not sure it was the right decision but I'll reconsider at the next round!

Life is certainly too short. And I know what you mean about pick ups - I definitely question my choices when I have 2 children crying at me immediately after pick up because I've brought the wrong snack. Then I think "I'm working a boring job for THIS??!" 😂😩

This is helpful, thank you. I am conscious as well that the idea of working in human rights / charity / some other "meaningful" law area might be very different than the reality! So I'd be trading a "good" job for something that I have no experience in and which might not be worth the swap!

A.I. will impact massively in sectors
like law. Use your time/ headspace to upskill and build connections

In my experience of many late night conversations over many years with friends who work in human rights (UK and international law, UK and international organisations, charities) the problem with having ideals is that you tend to drown in the paperwork/ politics of it.

How about finding another way to fulfil your idealistic/ creative side without giving up all the good things you will lose if you change?

Alternatively, go for it when your kids are a bit older and don’t need hands on care as much.

Same here - went self-employed 3 years ago at 14 years PQE and tripled my pay, I can work from anywhere and it’s all on my terms.
I don’t really understand how litigation can be boring?
I do family law and boredom is never an issue, stress is though!

Just to add I have a friend who has worked in international justice (torture monitoring) for decades. His hobby is art (quite successful) and his theory is that the extra money you make from a job has more value going to a fund that has solid evidence to prove it helps- like Medecins Sans Frontières for example. Rather than pushing paper at an NGO.

Charities can be very flexible. You might find something which can offer a degree of flexibility and is a bit more interesting but honestly it sounds like you have a fantastic work life balance and can be there for children.
id wait until they go to secondary school

I am working out my notice of a flexible legal role, moving to a 5 day in office role. Slightly bricking it, but tbh I held out for too long because I was scared of losing the flexibility, and it left me with debilitating stress as I was so unhappy, bored and demotivated working way below my ability. You could look at in-house roles, which are often more flexible than PP as the internal clients will also be utilising the same flexible working policies! If you are aiming for the Charity/NFP sectors, you may well find the pay a bit of a pinch.

I had a job like this. I was so bored, I didn’t feel fulfilled and I started getting resentful when men who were not as qualified as me and had less experience got promoted.

When my youngest was at the end of reception I went back to doing full time work, 4 days in the office. I have not looked back. I feel happy, challenged, excited. Afterschool care has been amazing and I get told off if leave early and pick them up!

I pick and choose with my husband who attends school things, but we don’t do all of them and I haven’t felt guilty about it. It was the best decision I have made in terms of my working career. I also love that I’m not the default parent in terms of school admin etc. It’s been a real boon for our family.