To stay in my flexible legal job despite being extremely bored / unfulfilled?

[iwanttopaintitblack]

I am a solicitor, qualified for 6 years. I work in litigation / disputes.

I work 9am - 3pm Monday to Thursday (have Fridays off) with an annual salary of about £50K (pre-tax). I take home about £3K after tax per month.

My job is EXTREMELY flexible (primarily because I have worked with my managers for 10 years, as I trained with them). I have two children - 3 and a 5 year old girls. I do all school/nursery drop offs and pick ups, we don't need after school childcare and I can be very present in my children's lives. I am able to attend all school events - it is never an issue and I don't need to ask permission. I can just attend and then make up any hours at a time that suits me. I can work from home all the time if I want to - I didn't go to the office the entirety of the summer holidays!

I am very aware that my job is very suitable for a family life and pays reasonably well. I know how lucky I am and that these jobs are rare, especially in law.

However, I am very bored when I'm working. I have somehow fallen into an area of law that I am not very interested in. I wanted to be a human rights lawyer, and have ended up in something with no soul and unfulfilling (for me).

I've been looking at more fulfilling roles, such as charity or environmental law. However taking such a role (if I was even able to move into that practice area and was offered a job) would likely mean working full-time, less flexibility and generally more stress in terms of after school childcare etc (I am assuming).

I can't decide if I should be pursuing something more fulfilling or just stick where I am, whilst kids are small.

YABU - change jobs to find something that you enjoy - choose FULFILMENT

YANBU - stay in your job as you earn well and it accommodates family life, whilst your kids are so little - choose FLEXIBILITY - if you choose this, do you think working from the office might help with motivation/ enjoyment?

Help me decide, thank you!

I agree with others that maybe you should look to add meaning to your current arrangement rather than changing it up. What you don’t want is to give up your amazing flexibility for a job that doesn’t have much net benefit career-wise whilst also massively impacting home life. It is really rough trying to fit in tea, rest, homework, bath and reading in 60-90mins every day. Throw in some torrential rain and darkness at 4 and it’s a really hard slog.

Agree with a PP re volunteering / pro bono. Getting involved with local community groups, the school, etc etc. it’s still charitable to be the treasurer or secretary of a small local community /arts / sports group. Etc etc.

once the children are 6 and above it will feel very different.

Hi. Litigation is definitely not boring. I've just found myself practicing in a small niche within litigation that comprises mostly of complex insurance law and contract interpretation, rather than actually litigating!

Good luck and well done for being brave!

Oh gosh that would send me to sleep!
i thrive on the drama of family law but it’s also draining at times. Addictive, though, and very rewarding when you get a good result for a client.

To those of you who have set up on your own, was it difficult? What are the approximate start up costs. Insurance I imagine.. tia.

I did it in low key way when kids were small but it’s grown. I now out earn dh we are considering him giving up his job and joining me. I just blundered really at first but now I don’t have to advertise my clients are mostly word of mouth referrals from earlier clients. It’s not for everyone you need to be quite ballsy and ideally have a second income spouse at first.

The male local solicitors I spoke to initially all doom mongered about how it couldn’t possibly work long term and the risk etc. 13 years later I out earn all of them. I see it as a feminist thing post sahm the jobs on offer for me as a solicitor were really lame so I made my own job.

Wow - well done to you. Sounds like you have worked hard and had a great outcome.

I’ve done full circle, I now don’t look to work for anything more than getting the money I need, in as least time and disruption to my actual life as possible. So strange that once I accepted this mindset, work isn’t dull anymore. I have no loyalties either, if a competitor offered me what I need for 3 hours less a week, I’d be off.

Find fulfilment outside of work, a hobby a course etc

I think you will regret it if you stay where you are. There will come a point when the kids will need you around far less and you will have potentially left it too late to purse a career you are passionate about. That an incredible role mother to be to your girls. Obviously all this only applies if you can make it work with additional childcare. I would be careful though about sacrificing your dreams.

Thank you all for your helpful input. 90% voted towards staying where I am, with 10% voting that I should follow my dreams. Very reflective of my current mindset!

I am going to take on board suggestions about finding fulfillment outside of work for the moment but also taking steps to move towards a more fulfilling role once the kids are a bit older (I might start exploring what I would need to do to move into my desired practice area). Am also planning on being in the office more often, as i do find working from home quite isolating and distracting, with all the housework surrounding me!

Thank you all x

I think the fact that you describe them as "your dreams" says it all to me - do it!

A lot of Mumsnet values really highly doing every school pick up but that isn't everyone's idea of fulfilment

Keep the job and look for a hobby you find more fulfilling.

You aren't going to find an unmanageable life where you can't care for your dc in the way you want fulfilling.

Make the change when your dc are older.

I’d bite the bullet until the kids were a bit older if it was me this sounds a perfect set up.

Wait till your kids are a bit older maybe?

In the current environment I would stay with your existing employer to maintain redundancy protection, but yes look for increased hours or a side project when your youngest has settled into school.

I read the title and wondered if I’d started a thread and forgotten. It’s similar to how I feel - bored but in a job I can do, it’s full time but flexible so my dc can come first, it pays well and I’m good at it.

I’m staying but “for now”. The job market is terrible and I am planning to bring meaning into my work through projects I’m doing. It’s a slog at times I won’t lie.

This is so true - I might change to a more fulfilling job, but find home life less fulfilling and be in a worse off position!