AIBU to feel hurt my partner uninviting me and invited friends over without being upfront?

[Mil10]

My partner and I have been together for a year currently do not live together as I have a dog that does not like him. I’d like to make changes to living arrangements to make this happen but he does not seem keen to do this.
He is currently injured and cannot drive, I made plans to go to him this afternoon when leaving him on Monday. He seems to forget this by Thursday and then after being reminded asks if he can see his friends instead specifically naming 2 men. Now one of these men is dating a friend of mine who is currently not talking to me, because they feel I did not do enough during the recent loss of a pet. I was pretty certain the evening he planned would include her and it made me a little upset but he did not say it and a friend had been travelling for months (he saw him Thursday to go out to breakfast and Friday morning to play with man toys). Both men are off on holiday for 10 days from tomorrow which is another reason he wanted to see them (the other guy he raced with the previous Saturday and then spent the evening with).

It then transpires that he invites them all to his home for dinner. This I admit upset me as I assumed they would go to the home of the friend who isn’t speaking to me where I would not be welcome or maybe eating out. This feels like he chose her comfort over mine (and his own) and being his space that hurt my feelings. If I had visited for the afternoon as planned and been there for the meal, it would have given her a choice of whether to come or not. I had no choice.

I think he should have just been upfront with me and said, I want to see my friends, she’ll likely want to be involved how do we play this? AIBU??

Your dog doesn't like him ? Trust your dog. Move on. Happy to help.

I'd make a point of being sure anyone I was dating got on with the dog. Does your dog have an issue with most people? Or is it just him? Either way, I'd do some training.
For this particular case, tell him exactly how you feel about the situation, listen to his response, and judge his reaction.

Christ, I'm exhausted just reading that. It's not easy and straightforward, your dog doesn't like him.... there's nothing positive here. Just get rid. It doesn't need to be this hard.

I came on to say the same as
@grumpygrape
Your dog obviously doesnt like him for good reason.

And you seem to come quite a long way down the pecking order when it comes to people he wants to spend time with and who he cares about.

I think he has treated you extremely poorly and I think you deserve much better OP.

This !

Animals know!

What did your friend expect you to do when her pet died?

Be like your dog… and dump the boyfriend.

These are not the actions of a man who is into you. Sorry.

Why would anyone continue to date someone their dog didn’t like?

Curious about this too

This was my first thought too! It shouldn’t be this hard so early on Op.

My dog hates everyone, it’s not personal.

This is not a very good relationship
Your dog doesn't like him
He doesn't seem to like you very much
I think you know what to do

I’m not sure, that week I had a bunch of migraines which is unusual and didn’t meet her and others for dinner. The following weekend I reached out she hadn’t come back to me to make a plan after 2 days so I went to see someone else that weekend. I put together with other friends to buy a card and gifts. We also work together one day a week, I didn't want to bring it up at work and upset her, she accused me of only talking about myself. I think she’s just sad and she knows I would have let my animal go sooner. I never said she should though!
I feel like my life has reverted to teenage years again at the moment

How are you partners if you don't live together? Anyway trust the dog

I'd be pretty pissed off if I'd made plans with him and he then decided he'd rather see his friends! That shows you that you are not a priority in his life. Maybe the relationship has run it's course and it's time for you to move on?

Train your dog. This is going to be an issue no matter who you're in a relationship with if your dog hates everyone.

If you still want to be friends with your friend and sense she does too, work on repairing that relationship. If not, accept she doesn't want to and move on.

Sounds like you and your boyfriend have different priorities. Does he cancel on you or avoid seeing you often? If it's a pattern, I'd say he's not that bothered about the relationship and it's time to move on.

He’s not your partner. You barely have been involved. He is just a selfish boyfriend. Stop complicating things. Just dump him and move on. Whether you can keep your other friendships is up to you. Work on them separately.

He wants to see them because they're going away for ten days?

🤣🤣🤣

Nailed it!

That’s an interesting comment as many call the other their partner, and don’t live together. So is that right then that they shouldn’t say that, if they don’t. I have always been a bit inbetween on how people consider things a certain way, when they don’t live together etc. This ranges from people who have kids together but don’t live together. And who get engaged but never married, and keep calling the guy her fiance.

This is true re the lack of priority. I suffered that for more years than I would like to remember. It’s not good or nice.

All the people sound like twats, dump them all.

So he could have invited you round aswell.Listen to the dog the man’s a prick and you ain’t high up on his priority list.