To want to know why I feel so tired/ill all the time!!

[Bamboozle30001]

I'm 41, 5ft 7in 12 stone and I strength train for half an hour 4 days a week. I do under 20k steps due to being a cleaner 5 days a week. I eat very well and log my food on myfitnesspal.

Last week doctors thought my gallbladder was inflamed but, bloods, urine and a further physical exam all came back fine. Then why for the love of God am I am ALWAYS tired?Energy drinks or black coffee do nothing. I sleep for 8 hours.

I'd had a previous blood test a few weeks back as I suspected perimenopause but apart from high reading of b12...which I have no idea where that came from as I don't eat much in the way of the foods mentioned that are fortified, or take vitamin supplements either. I do have fibroids, but still I constantly feel tired and just generally unwell. Like the feeling that you're coming down with a cold, just run down all the bastard time.

Would it be worth getting a private doctor and see if there's any other tests or something because I am fed up of feeling like this.

And i do strength workouts on home on youtube. Im not going to a gym. Can't afford that, nor do i like workouts in front of other people.

What do you mean?

I could have written that! I lost so far 40kg as they said losing weight would help.
Nope, still tired, in fact MORE tired. More sore. I fall asleep at the drop of a hat.
Bloods all normal - well in normal range. I have MTFR, as well as an autoimmue condition and genetic condition - all cause fatigue.
I do take supplements, so they are normal WITH these.
I am also on MJ for the weight loss - which even in a deficit is not losing me any.

They didn't check my T3 though...so I might ask about that as THAT is the one that actually fuels you.

With MTHFR the conversion of t4 to t3 is impaired - which results in general BLEUGH ness.

That is true, but these are good. They help identify what you might need to eliminate, I wouldn’t have known without doing it but 12 weeks elimination diet was a challenge!

What are you eating to support your gut microbiome? I would be looking to support this given your issues with bowel movements. I may be wrong but from your early posts it looked like you were not getting many fermented foods or fibre. I would fix this before introducing any supplements.

That's still 4 hours of cleaning, plus exercise, plus a 5 year old.

I don't mean to be patronising or write off your concerns, but also are you sure you have realistic expectations for being in your early 40's...?

Life is bloody knackering!

Perimenopause is definitely worth looking into though and if you feel a doctor is fobbing you off then ask for another until you are taken seriously. It's well known now that it can start in late 30's/ early 40's!

I think it’s likely that you’re not eating enough food. Which will sound counter intuitive when you’re trying to lose weight. But your activity levels are high, when plugged into a tdee calculator (google it) your maintenance calories will be close to 2200-2500. So you’re in a large deficit for a long time, which is not conducive to feeling good. If I were you I’d gradually increase by a couple of hundred calories, carbs probably, and eat at maintenance for 3 months while maintaining your activity.
Then you can judge how you really feel.
I don’t know anyone who feels energised in a calorie deficit long term.

Look up @dr.jennale on tik tok for more on this.

I have tried increasing calories but then I gain weight. I have tried everything. Wli was the only thing that got rid of the extra weight from having a child. I was doing exactly what i do now in terms of fitness but before the wli i was either overeating as suggested or undereating or just plain starving myself. I think the past week in terms of eating while foods bar the waffles and energy drink i have been feeling fuller. And i am.down 1lb so far. I must get ready for second job. Looking forward to seeing ds too. He has been given a school council role...after much asking it turns out his plan is to ask the headteacher for a toy we wouldn't buy him.

A lot of these conditions are also linked to and have an overlap with ADHD/neurodiversity. Which causes awful fatigue as your nervous system is on high alert much more than neurotypical people. Plus the masking etc.

It’s actually fascinating how all these conditions can be linked - see also ADHD and POTS, MCAS, CFS,
Long Covid..

I have ADHD and have basically been tired my whole life! I need a lot more sleep than most (which I don’t get). I used to marvel at how much energy other people had. Having kids then perimenopause made it worse.

OP you are still doing 4 hours of a physical job each day then strength training 4 times a week then looking after kids? Plus normal life. Your body doesn’t distinguish between the activities.

I’m only saying this as I have a physical job (fitness instructor) and I completely underestimated the impact it had on me and I would layer other activities on top (dog walking, running…). I exhausted myself (and ended up with long Covid). You need proper rest. We need to give ourselves permission to rest.

I am ND, was diagnosed privately at 16 with adhd, discalcular (not sure ive spelt that right) and on the spectrum of sorts.

I did wonder OP. It’s explained a lot to me in terms of tiredness levels. Life is more exhausting if you are ND.

I would recommend trying to fit in a bit more genuine rest in to your day. You sounded so self critical ‘I then sit on my arse’ but you have two cleaning jobs! You are physically active for at least 4 hours and then everything else on top of that. Add in the loss of hormones when we go in to Peri…

Perimenopause has also been shown to be harder for those with neurodiversity.

I forgot to say when you switch to the high dose iron, take it on alternate days. Not every day.

That's partly to ease any side effects on your digestion, but mainly because the high dose triggers the release of a hormone that then stops you absorbing more for 24-48 hours.

Have you had a scan of your gallbladder. My bloods took 2 days to 'peak' during a big flare up where I was hospitalised.

I get that frustration. The question is - how quickly did you gain the weight? If it was immediate / short term it’s not likely to have been fat. The scales are one thing, but when you’re strength training the scale is only one metric. We need to measure, yes, but look at weekly trends not individual measurements. Sometimes it is even worth stopping weighing in and just going by how you feel. Energised and strong Vs tired and depleted.

If someone said to you, I promise that you will lose fat BUT the scale will definitely go up and not down, would you be happy with that? Theoretical question but it’s asking what your real goal is.

The question is are you aiming for low weight and frailty, or a static or even increased weight (probably temporarily) for better body composition and health? It’s a long game. I’ve struggled with this mental shift.

@EricTheHalfASleeveare you a GP by any chance? I could never get my ferritin above 30, even with over a year of high strength supplements. Had an infusion in January, and the difference has been amazing. I also used to suffer from recurrent UTIs, and since the infusion, I haven’t had a single one. Could be a coincidence, but I do wonder if my immune system has improved since the infusion.

Did they check all vitamins D, Iron, Thyroid?

I think most people need to take vitamins.

I take magnesium glycinate from Solgar
Menopace Vitabiotics
Omega from Onvits?
Vitamin D.

How is your gut? Do you take probiotics/kefir?

I would go back to another dr.

I’m not saying that the lower calories are the full picture of why you’re tired by the way, hopefully it didn’t come across that way.
I also have had low ferritin and I can always tell when it’s dropped again. It’s like going from colour to black and white. And exercising 4 x per week plus 20k steps while having a low ferritin is probably stressing your body, making your weight loss so hard.

I think you need an intense period of trying to activate your parasympathetic nervous system. Looking after yourself truly 💗

No, doctor in a and e just felt my back and front and said it was fine.

4 litres a day is a crazy amount of water. It could seriously dilute essential electrolytes and symptoms include drowsiness and dizziness. Cut back to 2 litres a day.

If you dirnk that much, the thirst could be a symptom of diabetes - have you had your blood sugar levels checked?

One thing that causes extreme exhaustion is low Vitamin D. Did you end up spending more time indoors this summer, due to the very hot weather? It's worth taking a Vitamin D spray to see if it helps. Anothe common cause is low iron levels, and the NHS levels considered 'normal' are way below those of most western countries. As long as you don't already have high iron levels (which can also produce tiredness) it's worth taking a liquid or plant based iron supplement like Feroglobin or Floradix, as these don't have the constipation side effects that other iron supplements can cause.

Did you have flu or Covid? You could have post viral fatigue. It is crippling. I got it, as did a friend and her son, when we all came down with flu at the same time. It took us three years to fully recover, and only by stopping work and school for a few months to rest completely. It's one of the most horrible, frightening experiences I ever had. You have a very physical job, so it would be hard to recover quickly from this.

Maybe a silly suggestion - but have you checked the products you use when cleaning? Could some of them be toxic? can you simplify your routine and limit yourself to very safe products for the next few months?

I guess its my sense of humour. And the fact im not a high achiever like my siblings or husband.

That and the fact I'm always told by my mum and dh and my dsis who is a nurse, that its either all in my head or wait until you're older.

You will feel noticeably better when your ferritin is up to around 75-100. I was you - I am 42 and last year got to a point when even walking up the stairs was difficult. Since then, I corrected my iron (and a couple of other deficiencies) quit alcohol and nicotine, focussed on eating a mainly whole food diet and exercise regularly and I have more energy than I have ever had in my life. So I also obviously don’t have Peri - as is the first thing that everyone suggests to every over 35 year old when they have literally any symptom.

I thought adhd was linked to hyperactivity

My god, that's heavy, darling - you must be so anaemic! 🤗 Are they not able to help you with that? Ever tried mefenamic acid (from GP)?

Just get given a form for a blood test, redults come back normal, rinse and repeat.