AIBU to be fed up with screaming children in the supermarket?

[Njuy]

I went to the supermarket about half an hour ago and OMFG! Every child was screaming. There were at least 15 children aged (guessing) 18 months - 9 years old. Not one parent was bothered.

I was in the store for 5 mins

I was planning to have an alcohol free evening. Not anymore.

To be fair we don't know what the OP did to upset all the kids 😉

I was in a shop for 20 mins yesterday and a toddler in a trolley, shouted , screamed, chatted really loudly. Her parent clearly didn't ask her to be quiet . It was really annoying. To me , this parent is choosing not to parent.. poor child is not being told that there's a time and a place to be loud. No boundaries are so bad... Soft parenting cannot be a good option .

Why should a toddler be quiet?

Because it annoys people when they are noisy.

The list of what annoys people these days is endless.

I don’t notice unless I have to step over them. Some people are more sensitive, choose a quieter time to go.

Sorry but we don't live in a silent world. Don't like noisy kids, stay in your silent house.

I would think some of the sour faces on this thread are enough to make any child scream.

This. If being exposed to someone else's overwhelmed child for 5 minutes is enough to drive you to drink then the problem isn't the kid.

I don’t mind kids shopping because duh why would you ban kids from shops.

But it’s the screeching and screaming when a parent seems totally in their own world about it.

Chatting, even maybe singing to themselves. But not screaming. I quite like the little trollies they have for small children when they are used with a supervising parent who actually supervises.

There just isn’t a need to scream unless there is an emergency.

Same parents likely have the children that scream constantly when in their gardens ruining any kind of relaxing for their neighbours.

It's a shop. Middle of the day, adults enjoying some retail therapy. It's just inconsiderate.. I've brought up 2 boys and to be honest I never would have allowed them to be so loud for that long in a shop. The playground. Yes. At home. Yes... Why are children allowed to do what ever they feel like doing? It's not realistic, it doesn't prepare them to conform when ever they need to.. they are a nightmare for teachers and they generally can't cope when faced with some of the rules that exist to help society run smoothly..
You won't agree with me , but it's how I see it

Yes, it's absolutely impossible to differentiate between a temper tantrum, and a child just grinning and screaming while the parent does nothing about it. Impossible.

I find it impossible to distinguish between a child having a temper tantrum in a restaurant, or running around getting under the waiting staff's feet too.

Or maybe parents could, y’know, parent?

I work in retail, I have done for 20 years (allowing for breaks for pregnancy and that crazy time when I worked in mental health)

Also I have 3 children, I am definitely finding children in the store(s) screaming much easier mentally to deal with that my own screaming toddlers

Part of parenting is picking your battles.

I don't hurry to remove my children from the path of anyone who might potentially be annoyed by them because I don't see that as being part of my parenting role.

Do you mean having a tantrum or screaming for the sake of screaming? I absolutely hate parents that just let their kids just scream and squeal for new reason.

It's a supermarket not a church! Parents can't do right for doing wrong.

Small children scream when they get overwhelmed; you feel like you have to get drunk when you get overwhelmed.

How on earth do you expect a tiny child to control their emotions in the supermarket when you can’t either?

You're entitled to a child free life but not a child free world

But presumably you try where possible to make sure they’re not annoying anyone?

Where exactly has anyone said they want a child free world? 🙄

It's implied surely from op saying a trip to the supermarket has led her to drink as she can't cope with a couple of upset children?!

It depends whether I think their behaviour is ok or not. If I think it's objectively ok, then it doesn't matter if they're annoying anyone because they're not doing anything they shouldn't be doing.

For example, kids talking and playing at a reasonable volume on a commuter train will get lots of dirty looks, not because there's anything wrong with it but because commuters prefer sitting in grumpy silence. I sympathise with them (I preferred it too when I commuted) but my kids aren't doing anything wrong so I'm not shutting them up.

Likewise, people should really look where they're going and I'm not going to apologize to people who walk straight into my toddler because they can't be bothered to look below their eye level. But incredibly a number of people seem to get annoyed that I've not magically anticipated where they were going to move and removed her from their path.

Have you ever had a toddler?

It's rare enough for me to comment on it, but yes, there are times when screeching children in the supermarket seemingly uncontrolled by parents draw my attention. Whether it's due to the mental health of the child being unable to control itself or a lack of interest of the parent(s) in the child's behaviour, I honestly don't know. Maybe if the child is like that 24/7, then the parents are now at the "thousand yard stare" stage.

To be honest, there's an element of "there but by the grace of God go I" when I see this. I only get mildly irritated when I see

• full sized children 9-11 sat in a trolley (apparently ALL autistic children do this (they don't))
• children running up and down the aisles or attempting to pull goods off the shelves
• children (and adults!) eating food they've not yet paid for - usually biscuits or chocolate - never fruit
• parents attempting to barge in a long queue "'cos I got kids, innit"
• children attempting to "assist" me at the screens when inputting the car registration into the Aldi screen for free parking and (parents) kicking off when I block their way

I'd never intervene or pass judgement on them publicly - why would I?