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Managing a primary aged child's weight

102 replies

Hei3htfi · 28/08/2026 23:29

Ds has always been an ok weight. He was born 91th percentile for height and 75th for weight and it always carried on this way. Now he is 8 and this past school year, he has put on more weight. Initially I thought it was just growth spurt but it doesn't seem so. He has also noticed it. His dad and I are both skinny and so is everyone in the family. We have never restricted his eating and he mostly just has a small breakfast plus lunch and dinner. Hates sweet stuff and we don't snack as a family. I get that it isn't good and I would like to nip it in the bud but how? Obviously don't want to say anything to him as it would make him feel bad. Any tips on what worked? How do ithers manage their kids weight. We always just went by him eating what he wants and it worked. Until now.

OP posts:
Floppyearedlab · 28/08/2026 23:32

Portion control. If he isn’t eating junk food, he will be overweight because he is eating too much and not moving enough.

Watchoutfortheslowaraf · 28/08/2026 23:32

Around 8, my DS seemed to round out a bit despite being an active child who didn’t overeat. I remember noticing it. He then had quite a growth spurt so maybe a growth spurt is on the way. I think as long as he eats healthily and moves a lot, don’t worry too much. My DS is 14 now, 6 foot and if anything he is a bit too skinny and we’re trying to up his calorie intake!

shellyleppard · 28/08/2026 23:32

He could be in for a growth spurt. My sons used to put on a bit of weight then shoot up a couple of inches .

Softcream · 28/08/2026 23:32

If he's eating healthy meals and no snacks then I wouldn't worry too much. Maybe he's about ti have a growth spurt. How active is he?

Hei3htfi · 28/08/2026 23:37

He moves enough in terms of actual sport but he is definitely not a child who rushes around otherwise. Like during term time, he has a sport after school most days, over the summer - he did different sport camps. But I know that at school, he would rather sit around than play tag as it's boring for him. I just don't know how to limit his food if he says he is hungry. Never had to do that before.

OP posts:
DontBuyAnotherBook · 28/08/2026 23:38

shellyleppard · 28/08/2026 23:32

He could be in for a growth spurt. My sons used to put on a bit of weight then shoot up a couple of inches .

My nine year old seems to have put on quite a bit. It might be the holidays or I hope a growth spurt. She is tall and very physical.

Hollowvoice · 28/08/2026 23:38

My eldest would get quite round just before a growth spurt, could that be what's happening?

Hei3htfi · 28/08/2026 23:39

We just came back from a week at centerparks and he himself started saying that he is fat and not skinny - which made me sad. So it's not even me noticing it. I did notice that he can easily have an adult portion of food and has never liked kids menus.

OP posts:
Pumpkinswirls · 28/08/2026 23:45

Maybe take a photo of him to your GP and discuss it with them? Maybe it’s hormonal or just pre-growth spurt. Are you sure he’s not accessing treats somehow? You say you’re skinny, are you judging him by your own body type when maybe he is actually just a healthy weight?

DiscoCherries · 28/08/2026 23:48

What does a typical days food look like for him, OP?

Hei3htfi · 28/08/2026 23:50

I think it's more the change as in he was always reasonably skinny since birth and eating as much as he needed. How do people limit how much their kid eat? In our families, the issue was always the opposite as in we never ate enough and both Dh and I are thin. Not sure that in the UK, a gp would worry but that's because a lot of kids are pretty overweight.

He currently weighs 32kg age 8 so not crazy but also not low.

OP posts:
Dontlletmedownbruce · 29/08/2026 01:24

A little weight gain and rounding out a bit is common around 10 or 11 before a growth spurt but he seems a bit young for this. If diet is healthy then you'll have to control his portions. Buy smaller plates to deceive him filling his plate. Up the protein a bit so he will feel fuller. Less starchy carbs like bread and rice. He shouldn't be eating adult portions and you might need to introduce a snack to keep hunger at bay so he isn't ravenous and overeating. It's not easy .

TheJuryIsOut · 29/08/2026 01:31

Why have you given him the option of eating adult sized meals from restaurants? This is part of the problem, he shouldn't be eating that amount in one sitting. You need to reduce his portions, do it gradually. But yes you can tell him that he's had enough food even if he tells you he's hungry, tell him to drink a glass of water instead (kids often mistake thirst for hunger) it will be hard at first because his stomach will be stretched and used to a larger amount of food

TheJuryIsOut · 29/08/2026 01:32

What's his height?

Ohdearnotthisagain · 29/08/2026 01:37

It will be the adult sized portions.

Hei3htfi · 29/08/2026 07:58

So he only eats adult portions when we go out and obviously that's not often. Height wise he is about 136cm and 32kg.

His usual meal plan is same as ours really - a bowl of cereal for lunch; lunch and dinner which I guess change every day. During term time, he has a school lunch. He might have an apple or a plain roll after school if hungry but usually no afternoon snack during holiday.

My concern is how do I know whether he needs the food to grow or not. It's easier as an adult as you know you don't but kids usually fluctuate. Do people just say no that's enough? You can't have any more at meal times? It's not like I can cut out chocolate bars or crisps

OP posts:
sparkle17 · 29/08/2026 08:04

You definitely can say no that's enough. It will also help him in the future to regulate his eating by starting good habits now. Sounds like he is having enough to eat during the day so changing portion sizes is your option.

Ioafed · 29/08/2026 08:10

Hei3htfi · 29/08/2026 07:58

So he only eats adult portions when we go out and obviously that's not often. Height wise he is about 136cm and 32kg.

His usual meal plan is same as ours really - a bowl of cereal for lunch; lunch and dinner which I guess change every day. During term time, he has a school lunch. He might have an apple or a plain roll after school if hungry but usually no afternoon snack during holiday.

My concern is how do I know whether he needs the food to grow or not. It's easier as an adult as you know you don't but kids usually fluctuate. Do people just say no that's enough? You can't have any more at meal times? It's not like I can cut out chocolate bars or crisps

Is there always more food available at mealtimes? Can you just say there isn't any more most days? Sometimes mine ask for a few more chips or whatever but often there aren't many more to give them. Also, does he really like every meal you eat? Mine eat less if they're not so keen on something, which is at least a couple of times a week. We're not doing it to be mean, just that's the family meal for everyone and we're trying to introduce them to more foods.

Squidgemoon · 29/08/2026 08:10

His BMI is 78th percentile which isn’t overweight OP. Kids do fluctuate, my DS10 was a chubby toddler, average size from 4-6ish, super skinny from 7-9 and now at 10 has filled out a bit again, presumably in preparation for a growth spurt. It doesn’t sound like you have much to worry about with his diet and it’s great if he doesn’t really snack.

Coldcoffeekindamorning · 29/08/2026 08:16

Hei3htfi · 29/08/2026 07:58

So he only eats adult portions when we go out and obviously that's not often. Height wise he is about 136cm and 32kg.

His usual meal plan is same as ours really - a bowl of cereal for lunch; lunch and dinner which I guess change every day. During term time, he has a school lunch. He might have an apple or a plain roll after school if hungry but usually no afternoon snack during holiday.

My concern is how do I know whether he needs the food to grow or not. It's easier as an adult as you know you don't but kids usually fluctuate. Do people just say no that's enough? You can't have any more at meal times? It's not like I can cut out chocolate bars or crisps

You need to be more specific about what he actually eats and what exercise he does. From your description, my 3 year old DS eats more than him in a day!

TheWonderhorse · 29/08/2026 08:16

OP he isn't overweight. It sounds to me like he's eating better than most kids.

So long as there's no pressure to clear his plate and he has a balanced diet it's fine. Your job is to encourage good attitudes, I wouldn't stop him snacking, just make sure it isn't junk.

Merrymoonage · 29/08/2026 08:21

If he doesn’t snack at all then his meals are far too large, but surely he’s having break time at school so he is snacking on top?

An adult portion while eating out for an 8 year old is enormous.

It sounds like you aren’t actually being honest with yourself about his intake and portions.
Look up portion sizes for his age and see how far off your plates are. If he can easily eat an adult portion when out it sounds like he’s stomach is getting used to too big of a portion.

Cobrakainerd · 29/08/2026 08:21

I'd just up activity levels. School pe is woefully inadequate. A sport or activity 3-4 days a week minimum. When we were kids we were out playing after school, until teatime and back out again until dark or called in for bed. My kids did a mix of that and activities (football clubs, gym club, martial arts). At that age they would burn most off if active enough. How active are you OP?

fashionqueen0123 · 29/08/2026 08:24

Hei3htfi · 29/08/2026 07:58

So he only eats adult portions when we go out and obviously that's not often. Height wise he is about 136cm and 32kg.

His usual meal plan is same as ours really - a bowl of cereal for lunch; lunch and dinner which I guess change every day. During term time, he has a school lunch. He might have an apple or a plain roll after school if hungry but usually no afternoon snack during holiday.

My concern is how do I know whether he needs the food to grow or not. It's easier as an adult as you know you don't but kids usually fluctuate. Do people just say no that's enough? You can't have any more at meal times? It's not like I can cut out chocolate bars or crisps

That’s so tricky because if he’s not snacking where do you cut back.

Maybe it would better to introduce some lower calorie healthy snacks (my kids snack all day and are thin like most I know so I really don’t think snacks are that bad) like fruit etc and cut his main meal portions down. If he’s had something mid meal he won’t be as hungry. I’m surprised an 8 year old could eat an adult portion. Start ordering kids meals and at home use a kids plate.

Does he do swimming lessons? My kids are on a trampoline in the garden a lot which is easy to set up.

Junglekat · 29/08/2026 08:27

Are you sure it’s not your perception of skinny vs overweight affecting your judgement?

According to the nhs bmi calculator he is in the healthy weight range.

Also kids at home during the summer can often get a bit chubbier and then lose lots of this when they return to school.

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