Why can't I just find some pants?!?!

[Knickerbockermisery]

After a long, painstaking and expensive search I have finally found some knickers I was happy with. The right type of fabric for my preference, the right style and they fit! don't squish me in on the waist band, don't have my little belly fat sticking out at the bottom. Don't give me a wedgy. And only £22 for a pack of four (Victoria's Secret from Next).

Alas, my joy was short lived. After one day, I am back to the never ending drawing board of finding pants I can wear. All the above reasons stand, they're perfect on paper - BUT - feminine items will not stick to them! Not even a bit. It's so weird. I like to wear a daily pad, just to feel hygienic through the day in case of small leaks (thanks kids), but they will not stick to my new pants at all. OK, I thought, I'll just hold the pad in place in while I pull them up and then they'll just stay there. WRONG. Not only did they not stay there, the otherwise super comfy pants somehow turned the back half of my pad into some sort of bum floss which I was then constantly trying to unwedge. And when I went to the toilet and lowered them, the pad was nowhere to be seen. Oh wait, there it is dropped out onto the floor (thankfully not in the toilet bowl!).

There's absolutely no way I'm chancing that with with a sanitary towel when I get my period.

(btw, I did think maybe after a wash they'd stick better. Made no difference)

So that's another £22 down the toilet (pun intended) and I have to consider the perfect pants just don't exist.

Is it just me that finds buying basic every day pants so bloody hard!

I’ve found my holy grail pants now and they are very cliche M&S pants. Absolute bargain price too.

The high right shorts with a lace top.
Nice thick gusset, covers my mum tum and my ample backside, but pretty enough not to feel like granny pants on the washing line. They also tumble dry well - not sure of the material but they do feel cotton like.

I couldn't cope with those knickers, the detail on the edge would make them unwearable for me

I get what people are saying about huge bridget jones pants, I did buy some after baby because I thought they'd be much more comfortable but I hated them. I think because I could feel how huge they were on, even though they were not uncomfortable, something in my brain just wouldn't accept them.

Someone mentioned Bonds upthread. I remember I did actually buy some from a Coles supermarket in Australia as an emergency. Despite picking slightly the wrong size, I really liked them. I might try and find some here if I can.

So, why does M&S assume some women including plus size women like narrow gussets? Surely the width of gussets should be standard?

I’ve never noticed anything when I put my leggings on (not that I’ve worn leggings in forever since it’s been so hot) but then I only wear leggings with dresses or long jumpers as I feel naked otherwise.

People looking for wide gusset but slightly Bridget Jones granny pants style that are SUPER comfy, I recommend Innersy high waisted pants from Amazon. If you are over size 20 they also have a plus size type but their sizes are generous. And they wash really well. The only annoying thing is I personally find the gusset isn’t quite long enough at the front for me but not sure if that’s just me or more the pants! They’re mostly cotton with a bit of spandex for stretch. I don’t wear anything else now, have replaced all my pants with these!

OP I wonder if you prefer the slightly silkier type of pants whether the Sloggi zero feel kind might work for you?

I live in M and S period pants. So comfy. Lovely padded gusset.

Try Tena Lights sensitive as liners. I wear Stripe and Stare and they are lovely and comfy and I read online to use Tena and they are fine

I had the same issue as you regarding wondering where the liner had gone…

There’s a whole Instagram about this, two women have set up a company producing knickers. I watched one of their videos and their USP is decent sized gussets
apparently the width/size of a gusset is never discussed in knicker design

That was me (I'm in NZ). I've tried all different pants over the years and always go back to Bonds. The ones I mostly wear are made of cotton, modal and elastane and are very comfortable. They don't ride up, they don't fall down, the gusset is big enough - perfect really.

I agree, gussets have got a lot narrower. And I find they are often too far back (but I don't notice this until after I've worn them with a pad, go to the loo to find the blood is all at the front 🙄).

I have to wear a pad every day, because I bleed every day. I'm not sure vaginas need to 'breathe' though, that's lungs.

Reusable pads are a nice idea, but I've never found any that are really suitable. Carrying the dirty ones around with me when I'm at work, or a festival, or camping, or out shopping, just isn't practical. They also swizzle round in my knickers so I end up with the poppers against my labia, which is uncomfortable.

I've tried eco pads, they literally dissolved with the sweat in recent heat.

I've also had the sticky problem, which seems to be the fabric on some knickers, but also sweat seems to have an impact. I've found pads stuck to my thigh, labia, nothing (plop on the floor when you pull your keks down).

And period pants are too much to wear literally every day.

Sloggi have been the best I have found for a sensible gusset.

I definitely am kicking myself for not buying more in the next size up. The ones I had were boy short style, and even though they were too small they were surprisingly comfortable. My FIL visits Aus and NZ annually but I think it might be a bit much to ask him to buy me underwear 😂

Step One bamboo are the best

Mine are boy shorts too, love them. Your FIL might enjoy a trip to the lingerie shop 😀

These are my new fave after years of boy shorts. I size up, Im a 14-16 and wearing an 18. Love them
No VPL, no cutting in, no wedgy.

I use sloggi knickers. They are the shiny kind but with a soft gusset lol. They go over my tummy overhang nicely as well

I like microfibre knickers. M&S have several different designs in microfibre eg:

https://www.marksandspencer.com/5-pack-no-vpl-microfibre-high-leg-knickers/p/clp22077642?color=BLACK#intid=pid_pg1pip48g2r8c1

I also really like Boody - but pricey.

Watch out for the knotches!

Fantasie Smoothease every time for me. They’re generally always on a 3 for 2 offer in M&S (online)

🤣🤣🤣

I hated all pants I bought for years and then went to a festival a few years ago where I discovered a solar powered sewing stall in the craft area where they taught you how to make your own pants with an overlocker! I did buy several of the ready made ones they had for sale too but then went home, 'borrowed' my mum's overlocker and have never had such comfy pants in all my life. It isn't cheaper than buying them though 🙈

The company is called Mardybum Boutique, it's a tiny business run by two women who make everything themselves, if you'd rather buy pants than learn to make pants!

I feel your pain! Hope you find some good ones. I chanced on some lacy high waist high leg ones from the M&S Body range that cover my weird c section tiered tummy overhang and look reasonably flattering with enough bum coverage. I bought in bulk so I’m hoping they will last me a while!

I don’t use many pads though so not sure about adhesion.

Take a look at Amazon
Wysteria Lane Cotton Comforts Women’s High Leg Lace Briefs 3 Pack – Cotton-Rich Stretch Knickers – Soft Breathable - Durable Everyday Underwear
I feel your pain. These are the only ones I’ve found that are pretty but do a good job!

Just use some super glue. That should do the trick!

I just buy black Sainsbury’s full pants, multi pack of 7, buy a new pack each year for my holiday and rotate the older ones out as elastic fails/ shrink so I have about 25 pairs total. Have a few matching fancy ones that rarely get worn