Is the dog invited?

[DoggyAuntie]

My husband's brother and his wife are coming to stay with us this weekend, on their way back home from their holiday further north. All good. They live in a big house with a garden whereas we live in a smaller house with a back yard but we can cope for a couple of days.

This afternoon, I looked at my sister-in-law's Instagram. She has posted photos of herself and her husband on holiday - with her dog!

I have not invited the dog. The dog had not been mentioned. I do not want the dog in my house.

My husband has said it's just one of those things. I feel they are being insufferably rude to expect me to welcome the dog into my home without even asking.

Am I being unreasonable?

So.. it's... a... person now?

Obviously 🙄

you know they are on holiday with dog

you know they holiday with their pet

No, and also, no.

Upset they might have been. That does not make a dog a person. How many dogs do you see on peoples family trees?

Not a single dog owner thinks their dog is a person.
That is just something that dog haters project.

Why are you still on MN and not actually communicating with the people who this thread is about?

Dogs aren't humans. You may consider the 2 terms interchangeable. Not everyone does. You seem to struggle with the concept of other people having different values and world views to you.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Person

Except that @NewHere83 said, about eight posts ago:

many people believe animals have personhood

Well, some people believe the earth is flat. They are wrong.

And why are you arguing it when you should be actually communicating with the relatives that have a dog and are due to visit you?

(a) This wasn't a holiday and (b) she doesn't know that.

Agree this is best way forward
But it should come from you and only you as you are the one that is against it not your DH.

Take ownership rather than get your husband to tell them. If they ask why tell them your reasons.

@DoggyAuntie I really can't stand yappy dogs so yanbu. I think you ruffled some feathers saying dogs aren't family (I agree by the way, it's just a fact). You can love your dog, cat, rabbit, snake whatever as if it's family ofcourse. Just like the OP can love her clean sofa..

An awful lot of them call their dogs boys and girls, though. What's that about?

But I wouldn't expect my hosts to assume we had brought our dog and would definitely mention it.

Because in real life I'm sucking it up, like I explained five or six times.

I disagree. It should come from DH, as it is his family. I have the awkward conversations with my family and my DH has the awkward conversations with his. It’s unfair to have your spouse go in and have the awkward conversations with your crazy family members.

Would you rather they call them males and females? Or bitch and stud?
How does it affect you?

What about couple living together and not married?

Don't suck it up. Just tell them they can't come if they bring their dog. And then don't bitch and moan when they don't come. You don't want people to think you're a cow. Just own it, stop pretending to be someone you're not. Make a decision, own the consequences (yes, your husband will be annoyed, yes people will think you're uptight). You're getting annoyed about what other people believe and think (which is not in your gift to control) instead of just owning your own shit.

Since you haven't even communicated with them properly about it and only know the dog is with them due to a social media post,how do you know they're assuming they can bring the dog and haven't booked it into a kennel nearby?

Why should I, and not my husband, have their way?

Marriage is a compromise. I'll suck this one up. He can suck the next one up.

lovers/partners but not family. If they have children they will become a family as the children will be related to them both.

I don't.

Quite. She’s even rude to the people in support of her!