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AIBU?

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Is this how undertakers behave these days?

77 replies

Londonmummy66 · 06/08/2026 17:24

Is this normal for an undertaker? My father had a funeral plan and pretty much everything was covered (or so I thought). SO I was somewhat surprised to get a chasing letter from Co op Funeral Services for non payment of fees. On investigation the local office told me that there were £140 of additional items my father had requested that weren't included in the plan and a fee of £50 for the crematorium switching on the electric organ so my husband could provide a bit of "till ready" background music as the minister was late due to bad traffic. I wasn't sent an invoice for any of this (still not had one....)

I explained that my father's estate has no liquid assets so I can't get cash from that until probate and that the joint bank account passed to my mother who has no capacity. I have an EPA for her following my father's death but that is still with the Public Guardian's Office for activation - taken them 3 months and counting. The banking arm of the Coop won't let me access funds for this without the activation code despite having a copy of the EPA - and I probably shouldn't pay the funeral expenses from my mother's account anyway as they are correctly estate expenses.

Co op funeral care said that none of this is their problem (including not having actually sent me an invoice) and that they are going to send debt collectors after me - is this how funeral directors usually act nowadays? My father took out an insurance plan with the Coop to avoid this sort of issue.

OP posts:
Londonmummy66 · 05/09/2026 11:29

unsync · 05/09/2026 06:59

Whoever executed your father's estate should have arranged for any additional funeral expenses to be paid prior to the joint account transferring to a sole account, which should not have been transferred until probate was achieved in any case. As a pp atated, the bank would have paid out from existing funds.

Notwithstanding lack of invoices, have the correct notice periods been followed for creditors to come forward? Notice of death published in The Gazette etc? If the correct procedure has not been followed, the executor(s) will be liable for the debt.

It doesn't work like that sadly - that account became my mothers alone on my fathers death - it isn't in the estate - most of the assets were joint so the estate isn't huge - hence my needed the OPG to pull its finger out and authorise my power of attorney so I can access funds for the things that are really necessary like care home fees..... I feel a letter to my MP coming on now I've sorted out the Coop!

OP posts:
Darragon · 05/09/2026 13:29

Great outcome with the coop OP, hope you can get the POA recognised soon. 💐

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