To be driven crazy by a few very, very common expressions on Mumsnet?

[Pineapplesonpizza]

Here are two to start with:

"Just that really." after the initial title of the post, sometimes accompanied by shrug emoji.

The word "surely".

Do you have any that irrationally irritate you?

“We are pregnant” .. no .. only one of you is pregnant.

"Super" used excessively . "I am super excited , I;m going to a super new resturant today , Their pizza is super delicious . I;m going to make an utter pig of myself and be super stuffed"

"So" . starting every bloody sentence with the word "So"

And while I'm at it -
Vocal Fry . I have to switch off so many YouTube videos because of tthis .

Super/So/Vocal Fry often co-incide .

The “I got screamed at” often comes after “ I calmly/politely asked…”

As if people were going to accuse the poster of being the original screamer.

A&E NOW

I hold out some hope that when others read that comment on that type of thread, they recognize their own situation and potential future. And perhaps they then decide that they won’t marry/have children with the asshole.

”Picky bits” - both makes me irrationally angry and mildly repulsed.
”Naice ham” - I can’t tell if you think you’re being self-deprecating, funny or sneering at others but even though I am definitely a ham snob, I cannot bear it.
OH - they’re not your Other Half. Aspire to be a whole-ass person yourself, for crying out loud. I love my husband but he is NOT my “other half”. It’s saccharine, juvenile and makes you sound dependent.

Even worse is 'We are plant-based'.

I think ducks in row is eternal on Mumsnet.

Accusing people of having "internalised misogyny" if they dare to suggest something another woman is doing is inappropriate or wrong.

I love a sly ‘hth’ when I want to be patronising

Oh , I've not been asked that , though it makes me think of a Brontosaurus

This one always feels very old fashioned, like something from the 1950s. I imagine a hand lurching out from nowhere, placing itself on my head, and wobbling it around.

Is she overstepping?

Veggie isn’t a mn phrase. It’s been around forever!

We are plant based is 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

Or a giant hand with an index finger extended to give your head a prod and make it shoogle ( Scottish word , means shake up)

“ isn’t it unfortunate that you’ve got a fever/diarrhea and can’t attend?”

And now I’m irritating myself because I see I’ve used a “/“ in all three of my previous posts on this thread.

'It's a generational thing'
'Could it be dementia?'
'You've got to remember she's very elderly now and won't be able to cope with [insert extremely common thing that the person mentioned was probably using routinely before the OP was born, maybe even instrumental in developing] like we can'
'Typical boomer'

All standard responses to any behaviour an OP reports in a person over 50.

Why can't your DH learn to drive and he can do some of the school run pick ups and take your DS to Football

not everyone wants to drive , not everyone should drive

I want to live rural , but we only have one car which I need to take the DC to school . Theres a house I love but it's 8 miles from the station for DH
Answers will be "buy the house you love , DH can cycle to the station"

And of course
"Your DH needs a better paid job/ pick up some extra shifts / get a second job in a pub"

'Forever home'

Makes me think of Hallmark greetings cards. Long-term is shorter and less cheesy.

Yep, Any criticism of any woman is 'misogyny'. Accompanied by hand wringing over how women love to 'tear other women down'.

"No?" at the end of a sentence.

I've never heard that in real life.

“Report to your line manager” “Tell your union rep” - as if everyone works in the public sector/very large organisation.

Everyone can wfh/take days off at the drop of a hat. Including “lazy” dhs. They might well be out being a sole trader workman or performing a heart transplant but no, they should step up .

"Hubby" makes me want to smash my head against a wall.
Edited to also add in "blended family" is used alot

It's always asked after thee wildly obvious too.
"My MIL is breastfeeding my baby whilst i am at pilates. Dh says i'm over reacting. Is she over stepping?"