AIBU to think weight loss conversations in the office are unprofessional

[Officechat]

I’m really struggling with something at work and I’m not sure if I’m being overly sensitive or if this genuinely crosses a line.

My office has become completely dominated by weight‑loss chat — not just casual comments, but detailed discussions about procedures they’ve had or are planning, extreme dieting, and very negative body talk. It’s constant. I’m sat there trying to work while listening to women openly hating their bodies, comparing what they’re doing to shrink themselves, and talking about medication requests like Mounjaro as if it’s just another office topic.

I find it genuinely distressing. It’s not the same as reading about weight‑loss trends online — hearing real people around me talk about themselves this way feels heavy and bleak. It’s hard to stay neutral when the atmosphere is so focused on self‑criticism and appearance.

This morning I’d been up since 6:30 cooking lunch for myself, and by the time I got into the office and the conversation started again, I felt physically tense and mentally drained. I even had to force myself to eat because the environment made me feel awful.

Comtext : i have previously had treatment for anorexia which later developed to B + P disorder. I am now considered "recovered" but im finding it really tough. Please note i have used Ai to clarify my thoughts as it was a jumbled mess for my therapy notes.

You’d like to censor others conversation due to your discomfort? Or you want to change job?

It wouldn’t bother me, I think this sort of chat is fine, and it is likely maybe your interpretation due to your own feelings on the subject.

I don’t think you can ask them to stop due to it, so I’m not sure whay you can do other than ask to work from home.

That would make me depressed too. Have you tried voicing your feelings to them? Maybe if they just know how you feel about it they'll keep it to the break room.

Presumably no one knows this is a sensitive issue to you and is part of office chit chat. If the office normally allows staff to chat whilst working I don't think much can be done apart from to explain it's a tricky subject for you and could colleagues please be mindful if you are present.

Have you tried talking to your colleagues and giving an alternative point of view?

Generally speaking, in an office environment people chat about a lot of stuff that I have no interest in and hold completely different opinions about and either I will say something or I will just totally tune it out and ignore. I think you probably find tuning out this kind of talk difficult because of your personal history in this area.

If there is too much chat altogether you could raise that as a general issue via your line manager perhaps.

If i hadnt added the personal context would you still think this type of discussion is apropriate ? Its so self loathing and hateful to talk about yourself in the way im hearing rn.

Have you said anything to anyone there about this? A quick word with your line manager and they can be asked to tone it down.

I think this is tricky. People do discuss personal things at work with colleagues so this type of chat probably isn’t that unusual. Equally I can understand why you feel uncomfortable. Do you need to be sat with these people? Can you work from a different space?

What sort of hateful and self loathing things are they saying?? Sounds like it's very extreme if it's upsetting you.

Rather that than Love Island

Yes!

No, I dont think you can police this kind of talk in the office. It would be different if it were discriminatory or breaking the law in some way but otherwise, you cannot tell people what they can and cant discuss in public.

Even if you could - who gets to dictate that? what if a topic you enjoy talking about upsets someone else?

It sounds as if it’s fine beyond normal office chat if you are picking up vibes of self loathing

Someone literally pulled their shirt up to show a surgical scar where theyd had a tuck done as the "shelf" was hideous and they "cant stand how it looked and would hate to ever let themselves look like that again" ..... which feels conpletely tone deaf to those around then that dont have the same body type. Unfortunately the office is split with team working in specific areas so i am unable to work in another spot. I have spoken to my line manager who agrees but says they will have to speak to the other teams manager as she cant discuss with those colleagues themselves.

It doesn't cross a line. It's not typical to feel how you do, I believe your reaction is due to your eating disorder. Could you ask for reasonable adjustments at work? Maybe some time working from home/single office/noise blocking headphones.

Part of being at work is being part of a social group. Chatting about your life (as far as each individual wishes to) and building relationships is important to many people. What they are discussing is not illegal or derogatory to others?? Is their own personal stories?? They are not forcing you to join in the conversation??
Then they are doing nothing wrong. It is not unprofessional to talk to your colleagues and share things with them.

I agree it is unprofessional and I do think it crosses a line, but then lots of people are unprofessional at work. I

Is it chat instead of work or just chat in breaks, etc? If it's continuous chat while people should be working it is inappropriate. If it's people chatting at times when it is appropriate to chat I guess they can talk about anything except the obvious racist, sexist, etc. If you feel your history of anorexia means the chat is attacking your disability it is maybe borderline.

Sorry OP, but I think this is normal office chat sadly. Barring clearly inappropriate conduct and conversations (sexual overtones, bullying, harassment, etc), people need to talk about something. Weight loss is a common area which groups of people who would not ordinarily choose to hang out will often talk about.

You can't police what people talk about. I went through a phase where I was deeply depressed about being single and living alone. It would bore me rigid and reduce me to tears after work when colleagues would constantly talk about their families, children, etc. I had to just try to tune it out.

In my opinion your reaction is extreme and comes from your own past issues.
Where I work this kind of chat is very common. We talk to each other about all
sorts of topics- we find it quite therapeutic!

Op, you can’t dictate what people choose to talk about . It is not illegal to talk about weight loss
This is akin to saying that people with children should not be able to talk about their children at work because a colleague is unable to have children and it would be distressing for them to hear about baby Johnny’s teething issues

I think that it naturally does form part of office conversation. We are in an extremely calorie rich environment, with an evolutionary predisposition to make the most of accesible food. Whilst also consuming all the media of slim people and the logical arguments of health.

It is such a well-worn topic because everyone has to think about healthy (or unhealthy) choices everyday.

I have never worked in an office where it wasn't regularly discussed.

You must work somewhere strange. I’ve never heard a bunch of female colleagues talk like this, ever. I would find it bizarre and tedious too. Are they doing this in the office when they’re working or over breaks?

Ok, so your colleagues are more confident to discuss and share personal thoughts about their bodies than most people I have worked with.

I personally do not find that comment about the tummy tuck operation to be full of self hate and self loathing. To me, the person who said that didn't like an aspect of their body and took a course of action to change it. I have no issue with that at all, and that sort of comment wouldn't have produced much reaction from me at all other than a moment's interest and curiosity and then I'd have mentally moved on.