Why is new boss being such a knob?

[Buggeroffboss]

Our old boss took ill suddenly in December last year and died shortly after. They been the boss for 20+ years, so appreciate we were all very used to them.

Following their illness I became interim boss. In April I was offered the role permanently but declined as it would mean returning to full time work. I'm bitterly regretting not taking it due to new boss!

We're a remote team, have been since many years before COVID. New boss clearly hates remote working. We do have an office, but it seats 10 people and us open to the whole business (approx 300 people) not just our department (40 people). New boss wants everyone in the office 2 days a week. HR have told him to go whistle - we are all on remote contracts and live across the whole of the UK, including channel Islands and 2 in France!

New boss is now insisting we schedule any "coffee breaks" (you know, where you brew up between meetings) and that under no circumstances are we to appear on screen with tea/ coffee if it isn't adjacent to our scheduled break. In addition he's put an embargo on lunch time errands, such as laundry, popping to the post office or collecting the car from the garage. All time is to be accounted for.

As you can imagine, morale has gone down the pan. We're a high performing department, there is 0 issues with productivity. Our work is largely invisible most of the time, lots of thinking time and idea generation which makes monitoring our day to day workloads difficult, but we always exceed our targets at quarter and year ends - so people are clearly working. In the 6 weeks he's been in there's been a noticeable change in how people are working, fewer people on early or late, most just working to their hours.

AIBU to think he's being a bit of a dick and just needs to chill the fuck out?

I’d send HR a very faux naive email asking if it’s true it’s new policy to not permit coffee or tea at desks while working from home and the team would like to understand why as a number of people including you are quite unhappy with it. I’d also make a point of taking urgent toilet breaks either during team meetings or between any back to backs.

How can he put an 'embargo' on what you do at lunchtime?

I wondered this too. Generally lunchtimes are ‘off the clock’ so it’s no-one’s business but your own what you do in that time - you’re not paid for it, so the obvious answer is he can whistle.

OP did say that it’s difficult for people to account for what they do day to day, but that the work done is evidenced in the meeting and exceeding of quarterly and yearly figures. Given that the new boss has only been in place a couple of months I’m wondering whether he doesn’t fully realise this and feels he needs to justify himself to be more’ visible’ by imposing more day to day accountability on his team.

OP if people are demotivated by his attitude, which is what you seem to be suggesting, then that will likely be reflected in the figures, and surely at that point questions will be asked at higher management levels.

My friend works for the worst micro manager ever. They WFH and have to have cameras on and have to join a teams meeting daily, this sits in the background whilst they are working, so micro manager can monitor them, bark the odd order at them, ask why they're going to the loo again - utter nonsense.
Let's hope your new boss doesn't implement this idea.

Does he want you to schedule in when you need to fart as well? Will he be listening in to calls in case you pass wind and it’s not in the diary?

It might be worth telling him straight up that his aggressive and controlling management style is destroying morale and good will.

Step 2 is to keep a detailed record of inappropriate micromanagement and take it to HR.

Step 3 is dust off your CV and get out.

I’d also be asking what business it is of the managers’ what his team do with their lunch breaks, given that they’re off the clock for that time.

This.
Every single meeting I'd have a brew in hand. In fact, just like i do now as we all make a drink ahead of meetings just like we do when in the office.
What a twunt.

He can't tell you what you are allowed to do on your lunch break, as long as you are taking the time allotted then it's up to you what you do.
He sounds like a nightmare, I would keep doing what you're doing - document it all and bring it to HR. Absolutely ridiculous.

Have you asked him why he is doing this, what is he hoping to achieve?

Since you are on good terms with him, can you ask what problem he is trying to solve?

He’s obviously not a good manager since he’s reverted to time tracking and treating everyone like children. What type of role did he have before?

I would not suggest this under normal circumstances....
but given that you covered the role yourself so presumably had interaction with your boss's boss in that capacity, have been there for so long, had good feedback when you were covering that role, and the team is otherwise high performing...
I would be ringing boss's boss and asking for a quick chat under the guise of.... 'hey, just wanted an off the record chat to see if everything is okay with Gary? Im a bit worried because of X (say what you've said here) and he seems to be quite stressed with it all so I just wanted to check in, obviously there might be issues im not aware of but I just wanted to check as its obviously come quite out of the blue for the team and is a bit of a culture change and I just wanted to check if everything was alright?'

Totally depends on your org, some places that would obviously be inappropriate but I think given you were the cover manager previously you are in a good position to do so. Also, it does sound like he is struggling - part of settling in to a new team is understanding the culture and implementing change in appropriate ways and sometimes when people are not clicking it comes out in twatty ways - he could also just be a dick.

What a twat.

I so r officially get a tea break but it’s standard to have a drink at a meeting and therefore universally reasoned “brewing up” will happen during “work time”.

@BuggeroffbossWork to rule then. Start at 9 (or whatever time) and finish dead on 5pm. Work phone off till 9am. Lunch break 1-2pm, also with no phone or screen on.
See how long he likes it

No. I could understand if it was!

If this behaviour isnt worthy of a grievance then I dont know what is.

So appalling of your new boss. Hopefully he gets the sack for his ludicrous demands.

Do you feel a bit singled out @Buggeroffboss ?

He’s been radicalised by the daily mail

He sounds like someone who can’t manage people, so substitutes good management with simply controlling. Why would anyone think they can control what people do on a lunch break. You’re entitled to a lunch break, and you can do what you like on it!

Yes, externally hired.

He's done it to me a couple times and several colleagues I've spoken to a few times. He can't be doing it to all 40 of us every week, he seems to pick on a group each week.

It's like he thinks we're all pretending to be back off lunch but we're not really. We don't even have fixed lunch breaks, it's getting the work done and we don't care attitude. Or at least it was.

He sounds like an absolute twat and you're doing all the right things - document all interactions, gather evidence, etc. What's his previous background? I'm just wondering if it's a high-control environment so he thinks this behaviour is normal/acceptable.

Good luck on tackling this @Buggeroffboss! I once had a very very toxic boss (in different ways) and was surprised by how drained of energy and enthusiasm I was by almost every encounter we had.

I'd be so tempted to make coffee in a travel mug and ostentatiously drink from it at a meeting as far away from a break as possible 😂 What a plonker.

I would be very tempted to persuade the team to play him at his own game so he gets a message from each of them when they put the kettle on, start lunch, end lunch, go to the toilet etc. Very petty but he sounds a bit power mad

OP he may know you were offered the role and feels threatened.
Toxic men do like being in control. Not called Ethan is he?
I was pushed out of three jobs in the last ten years by men none of whom were my boss.

You are obviously the next senior person in this 40 odd team. So in your shoes… if everyone is as unhappy as you are… I would be advocating for them and progressing this very actively.

Just go back to HR and ask if this is now company policy. I'm sure it's not. I guess this new person is on probation, so make your complaints to HR, while they can still do.something about it.