AIBU to worry about how I'll manage financially when I'm older?

[ShiteWithSugar]

And to be absolutely terrified?

I'm 56. Haven't worked since DS was born in 2000. Originally the plan was to go back part time when he went to school then more hours as he got older. Unfortunately I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis 25 years ago which put the kybosh on that plan. DH has been the breadwinner and is on an okay wage (about £30k) but not enough to pay into a workplace pension or anything. We don't have any savings to speak of (about £2k for emergencies).

I have tried to find very flexible, part time work for years but it's absolutely impossible with no references etc and knowing I'll need time off sick several times a month when my symptoms are at their worst and/or the side effects from the drugs I take are particularly bad. I did have a job briefly (a few weeks) in a shop in 2011 but they let me go when I couldn't stand behind the counter and was off sick for a week, which I completely understand even though it was heartbreaking. I have applied for PIP but was turned down. I did not reapply because it was so dehumanising and stressful and we could manage on DH's salary just about.

What will happen when I/we reach pension age? DH is five years younger than me if that makes any difference. I'm so terrified of getting older that sometimes I think it would be better if I didn't. No money and health that is already declining makes for just such a bleak prospect. I think of the retirement my parents had - little UK breaks, days out, the occasional treat for DS, not well off by any means but comfortable and happy - and think what the future holds for me in comparison and it's so frightening. I've never been on holiday in my life and we have never been able to afford driving lessons let alone a car!

AIBU to be terrified of the future?

https://www.gov.uk/plan-retirement-income

It sounds like you'll probably be eligible for pension credit - have a look online but at first glance it seems like your household income wouldn't be far off what it currently is if you get your PIP application approved (as that will increase the pension credit amount too) plus your DH may be able to get a top up if classed as your carer. Pension credit also gets you set up with some other benefits too such as heating.

Try not to panic, there are safety nets for people in your position

Give this a glance

@ShiteWithSugar I'm so sorry you have such a horrible disease. The PIP was set up for people like you. Please do apply for it again. If it makes you feel any better regarding the answers you're giving and how you might modify them, (around your capabilities) I know not one but TWO people who absolutely do not need it but have been awarded it. You deserve it. They don't.

One of them worked as a civil servant for years, which is how she knows so much about the criteria to be met. She's an unscrupulous person in many ways. She tipped off the other person as to how to get it. She worked full time for 37 years and part time for 3 years when her child was young, so has a good pension (and is good with money). Her husband earned well. She has now developed "anxiety". Or so she says.

It is extremely annoying knowing what she is doing and knowing that people like you are not able to get it.

Another vote for NRAS and the Citizens’ Advice Help to Claim team. And to check your NI as per the links above.

Of course it’s a good idea to take action, but I would try not to read too many doom laden predictions about the future.

No offence but your DH needs to get a better paying job.

Can you get creative with your time and make some money at home? Why dont you open a Vinted account and sell old bits and bobs, then start looking in charity shops and facebook marketplace to snap up a bargain to sell on to make a profit.

Oh God do I hate those "get a better job" or "why don't you re-train" responses. @Pineapplewhip you missed out telling her to take in ironing.

Some people just don't have a lot of money.

Of course you are being offensive.

I was going to ask about medication too. From your description, it sounds like you’re on methotrexate, is that right? Have you explored other treatment options with your rheumatologist? I have PsA rather than RA but biologics gave me my life back, from being bed bound to living a pretty normal life.

Oh please tell me they've at least tried you on biologicals OP

Even if you d ont get much state pension it will be topped up,with pension credit.

YANBU it is a worry for anyone sick/disabled.
It is worth going down the UC route... you may get some help with your rent, and you will get NI stamps. But if you are assessed as fit to work, then you will be made to look for work. And in all likeliness, you wont get any extra money as your DH earnings will wipe out what UC you would get.

But do try for PIP again. Most people get rejected first time.

Try for PIP again.

Try Citizens Advice to help you fill it in. They might be able to help you word things the way that fits the criteria and it'll reassure you that you're not doing it wrong or "fraudulently".

You’re right - some people don’t have a lot of money - especially people like the OP who have barely worked their whole life. And her husband who at 49 and a family to now solely keep is stuck on 30k - uber drivers earn more - why isn’t he out trying to earn more? Why didn’t the OP work when she could?

It’s a discussion forum after all…

In what world do Uber drivers earn morn? Unless they are working 65 hours plus a week

You mentioned child benefit that stopped due to your child ageing out. Does your child live at home with you OP or are you just living with your husband?

You need to apply for PIP again. Answer the questions as though it’s your WORST DAY. Not your best day.

How big is your home? If its a 3 bed from when you had your ds there, speak to your HA about swapping to a 2 bed. Your rent will be lower & so will your gas & electric as you'll have less rooms to heat. That might free up some money for you.

OP check your national insurance record. You need 35 qualifying years for state retirement pension. Get an Income Max appointment with likes of Citizens Advice. Agency work or flexible work an option or retraining for Part Time. Could even volunteer to begin with to build up your CV/references. Good luck, £30k is barely over minimum wage for 40 hours these days.

Get a Welfare Rights Adviser to help. You may or may not be entitled but they will give you an indication of how many (if any) points you are likely to be awarded.

Yes the stock market normally does bounce back but it can take years. For anyone coming up for retirement with a defined contribution scheme they should be aware of this and make sure they have de-risked appropriately. I'll be drawing down my defined contribution pensions in the next 10 years and this is definately a concern. Same for anyone planning on relying on stock and shares isa savings to bridge a gap between retiring and getting private/state pensions.

Would it though. I know of someone trying to swap a 2 bed council house for a one bed. Yet the one bed rent is 30% higher

And why would she be heating empty rooms? I don't do thst

Yes, a discussion forum, not a recrimination forum. Recriminating doesn't help anyone.

Fraud overpayment: 1.4 % of PIP expenditure (around £410 million).

Tax evasion: £59.2 billion, equal to 6.4% of the tax that should have been collected.

You can work full-time and still claim UC to cover rent or I think mortgage.

OP, have you looked at claiming Attendance Allowance? If you get the full amount, it’s £400+ per month. It’s not taxable but would make a great deal of difference to your budget. The form is long, I had help from someone at my surgery when I applied for it for my late husband, took about 6 weeks from application to first payment.