Can’t get outdoor toys because of DHs dream garden 🙄

[LeaveTheSweetsAlone]

Sort of lighthearted?

DH has been planning his dream garden for 5 years now - since we bought this house.

Now this garden hasn’t happened because of funds - it would need levelling etc, he wants to do patio and a pergola, it’s a nice to have and not a necessity. Also we both work FT and honestly NEVER sit in the garden. It’s also super hot in this weather, no shade whatsoever so it’s not even pleasant to do the odd BBQ on a Sunday.

But guess who does use it? DC! Of course they do, it’s way more entertaining than the house. Weekends, after school, love it.

So I said to DH let’s get a little play house in there, maybe a slide, one of those proper swings. They have a trampoline but that’s now turned to shit after a few years.

He is ADAMANT we cannot put garden toys in there because the “wood is just going to rot” and “it’s just another thing to get rid of when he does the garden up nice”. THE SAME GARDEN HES BEEN DOING UP FOR FIVE YEARS NOW. As it stands it’s just a patch of grass with some pebbles. DCs love the weeds though so it’s ok.

So AIBU to put my foot down, get a parasol and some stuff for them to enjoy or respect that it’s the only space that’s ‘his’ to decide on (I’ve furnished and designed everything else and the trade off was garden was his 😂)?

Or in true MN fashion, just LTB 😂

Just pick up some second hand toys from marketplace, gumtree etc people are always wanting rid of this type of thing for next to nothing once the kids have outgrown it. No need to spend lots and eat into the garden fund, but it also makes no sense to not let the kids use the garden whilst they're keen. I imagine you could get rid of the toys easily enough online once you're finished with them, worst case scenario it's a quick man with a van job.

My DIL bought the play ground little tykes off market place. There were tunnels, bridges, slides etc. it wasn't cheap but boy did the kids love it. A few years later she sold it for the same price she'd paid for it.

Get your kids some garden toys .... and get a nice table/chairs/parasol so you can also sit out there and enjoy it. We use our garden like an extra big room in this weather.

Just buy a trampoline!

My DH didn't want one as they take up too much space but I decided it would just fit in one corner of our garden without blocking the path so bought a 10ft trampoline for our 3 kids ( then aged between 1 and 6). Over 9 years later we still have it and even DS1 (now 15) still uses it.

My DH had to admit that it is so well used. Even in the rain!!

And no, my DH hasn't done what he planned to in the garden anyway.

Yeah we have one, I think it’s 10ft as well. I’m going to order a play house 😈

Good call on the trampoline. It was the best thing we ever bought for our kids. Every kid in the neighbourhood played on it too. The laughter and joy was endless.

Get things you’re sure they’ll actually use, that’s my main tip. Over the years we’ve bought all sorts of stuff they haven’t touched. When they were very small I bought an expensive tuff tray and stand for example because they loved them at nursery but they never touched it! They’re not into football so the goals have never been used either. We also did have a playhouse once but it was constantly filled with bugs and DC subsequently didn’t want to use it.

We currently have a slide with a den kit draped over the top part of it which they love. The trampoline is also a hit and gets used constantly. I get the paddling pool out on some hot days. Have a patio set so I sit out and work in the summer while they play.

Screw your DH btw, your kids are the only ones currently using the garden so of course they should have some fun things to do!

@Sartre ahhh bugs!! I need to think about this when I get this play house. Find something to maybe spray it with

I think children should get priority over the garden space for now (unless you’re about to say DH grows all your vegetables for the year in it).
Also get a small shed/storage box so the kids can keep their outdoor toys nice and they’ll last longer.

https://www.tptoys.com/collections/outdoor-toys/products/tp-explorer-metal-climbing-frame-set-with-monkey-bridge-ripple-slide-black-edition-copy We have this (and the separate UFO den thing too), my kids are quite tall so I thought a playhouse wouldn’t have much longevity whereas this can be played with in a few ways.

Next on the agenda is swings but I want one that’s adult weight rated so it can stay in the garden forever.

The trampoline was the most used thing in our garden by my DC and all the neighbours.
It was seldom used as a trampoline, more other more inventive games. It was big with netted sides and great for ball games. I remember them playing on it all year round, we fixed a light nearby for winter use.
Top tip - we bought a huge camouflage net and draped it over the top. The whole thing became a den.I used to do a party last day of term with big team games in the garden and the camo net also came in for obstacle races.

All grown up now.

So he wants a large ornament to just look at that the kids want to actually play in and spend time in and make memories in?

what an entitled selfish arsehole he is!

Families buy a house with garden for the kids so use it.