AIBU to wonder why strangers always seem to approach me?

[NotTodayPhyllis]

I am just curious wondering if this happens to other people or if I just give off a certain vibe…

Every time I’m walking somewhere or in my town centre or for example the gym or supermarket I get approached by strangers.

I get asked for directions fairly often when people must have GPS on their phone and there are other people around, I went for a walk last week and was stopped twice.

I’m in my town centre today just doing a bit of shopping and so far I’ve had the following:

I stopped to put some shopping in a bag on a bench and a woman in her 80’s has been telling me her life story.
I kept saying I had to go and she kept talking and I felt guilty because she must be lonely so I ended up sat with her for 20 minutes.

I went to a cafe for a drink and sat at an empty table. There were loads of tables free but a woman with her two kids sat next to me and started chatting. She asked if I had children and when I said no her kids asked me over and over why I didn’t until I joked and said I eat children and one started crying which was so awkward,

I’ve been asked directions twice despite town being full of people,

A man asked me where my trainers were from (who knows why?!) and he started asking me loads of questions as well about myself and I kept saying again I had to go but he wouldn’t stop talking until I said I was late for an appointment and now I’m hoping I don’t run into him again.

I’m ND and not very comfortable talking to strangers and when they ask questions I know the polite thing is to ask questions back but I never know what to say or ask.
I often get people sitting next to me on trains or buses with other seats free and I’m not exaggerating when I say this happens all the time. I think it must be unusual but maybe some people will post saying they have similar experiences.

I’m average looking except for being very short (4’9) and I don’t think I come across as that approachable because I’m so shy, I avoid eye contact when I’m out and about.

I’m currently in therapy to work on my self esteem and being a people pleaser and terrified of confrontation so I’ve brought it up before because I end up stuck in conversations I feel guilty ending.
My therapist thinks my height makes me look unthreatening and so people are happy to come and chat and I can understand that for something like directions but not for a man to ask about my children’s size 1 trainers!

I wondered if it happens to anyone else and if anyone has any theories why?
My DP said I must just have “one of those faces” but I don’t know what that means 😂.

I get asked for directions within a short time of arriving somewhere. My record is Edinburgh, within 30 seconds of stepping outside the front door on the first day. I hope it's because I look friendly and that I look like I know where I'm going. The irony is I have quite a poor sense of direction and am quite bad at giving directions.

I eat children 🤣🤣🤣

Snap! Less so since everyone has a phone with a map, but I always thought it was because I am tall and look like I know where I am going (even though I don’t always).

This. I used to be like you but I got tired of it, people would prattle at me. I don't actually like people all that much (I love my friends, but not randomers) I just developed a 'leave me alone' look and it doesn't happen nearly as often now.

I get asked for directions fairly often when people must have GPS on their phone and there are other people around, I went for a walk last week and was stopped twice

“sorry, I’m not sure” and carry on walking

I kept saying I had to go and she kept talking and I felt guilty because she must be lonely so I ended up sat with her for 20 minutes

This example is a you problem. You have pre-written a scenario in your head that she must be lonely therefore you must stay and listen to her… she could just as easily be like my next door neighbour who has a close family, good social life but would talk the leg off a donkey. If you don’t want to stay, say you have to go and then actually go.

when they ask questions I know the polite thing is to ask questions back

i fundamentally disagree with this. If you’re meeting new people at an event/workplace/group/etc then yes, but if it is a random on the street/cafe then the polite thing to do is to read the room. Occasionally strangers might be in the mood to chat (for a short time on a long haul flight), but if people are minding their business with earphones in at a table or park bench, then no, I don’t believe asking questions is the polite thing to do. It encourages conversation and then you’re stuck in situations you don’t want to be in.

I would say your size and general air probably makes you seem non threatening and an easy target, but then you’ve also gotten into the habit of humouring them and thinking that you owe these strangers your comfort and time.