I was so tired, but so happy, now i’m just so tired

[Whereisthegrassasgreen]

When Dd was smaller and I was fortunate enough to be with her until school at 5. I just loved the life so much, all the friends meet ups, the days out, the baking and crafts at home, the little shows and sitting cuddled up.
She’s now 7, i’m back at work, life doesn’t have anywhere near the same fulfilment or happiness

Was that the best it could get, I got five years of my perfect life, god I miss it so much

I’m not sure what line of work you’re in but would it be possible to get a school hours job? That way you can spend your school holidays together. I was fortunate to work as a TA all the way through my children’s education and it was a good mix of income and quality time with them. It’s nice to work with children of a similar age as yours too if you can.

This thread is making me so nostalgic.

My children are 12 and 8 and I’m now sitting here thinking about all the things we did together when they were younger that we’ll never do again ☹️

Time goes so quickly!
Cling on to it OP!

Hi OP
sorry haven’t read all the comments so unsure if someone has already commented on it, but I had IVF at 48 and had my baby at 49.
I won’t lie and say raising a child while perimenopausal isn’t hard, but he’s totally worth it. I’m also a single mum so that could also explain the extra tiredness!
I think if you have the embryo, you should try. You will always be wondering about it.
But by all means get the ok from your doctor first - i was very healthy before I got pregnant and had to get lots of tests done to make sure my body could handle it.

i am now 51, with a 21 month old and have other embryos - I am half-considering whether to try one last time (my IVF clinic allows it until 51).

So much. Sharing your favourite films with her, going on holidays to places where small kids wouldn’t manage. Sleeping in. Showing her how to cook your favourite dishes. Getting to know her friends. Getting to know her partners. Going thrift shopping together. Going to a sauna or something just the two of you for a treat. Getting her advice on what you should wear on a night out. Getting her advice on how to make the tech work. Getting excited about her coming to stay with you when you haven’t seen her for a while. Going out for dinner just the two of you. Talking to her about how she would like her life to be and telling her about all the mistakes you made ….

I have three (almost) grown up kids and although that early bit was great, I enjoy every year more and more. You might too.

I get what you mean, I worked when I had dd1 and 2, the dts got all of me, and I bloody LOVED it, I was very much the fun mum with them and the dds. They are all 11, 15 and 17 now, 11yos will still hold my hand in public (dd more than ds as that's so embarrassing mum in our town).

I have to say at 15 and 17 these girls do some amazing things that make me so proud of them, 5am Saturday wake up for a half marathon, normally I'd say fuck no, we all went. Dofe practice walk this week, was there in a minute once she was done, praising them all.

It changes for sure but there's definitely things that can keep you connected.

I work in a school and get half terms. I have spent this half term out and about with my 17 year old. Afternoon tea, theatre, shopping its been great! We have girlie holidays too. She loves being with friends a lot now but we still have fun. You have a lot to look forward too OP

It was my happiest time when I was home with my children before they went to school. Can't understand people who are just so eager to turn their precious LOs over to someone else to bring up . I was hard up financially but it was worth it . Enjoy it !

The baby/toddler years weren't my favourite stage. Couldn't stand crafts, sticky hands and cbeebies. Much prefer the primary school years. She's now 8 and has a sense of humour, we talk about more interesting things, she's developing skills and some talents. It's lovely watching her develop into her own person.

There's nothing wrong with wanting to put your 'precious little one' in nursery. The baby stage is quite tough for some people, and unfortunately, you don't know how you'll find it until you have one.

Pretty much every working parent I know only sent their children to nursery a few days a week, either working part time or compressed hours.

The stay at home parents I know tended to put their children in preschool several days a week. (Or pop them in the gym crèche most days and to grandma on the weekend)

If all the dads decided they too wanted to be full time stay at home parents how do you imagine it would work?

I feel proud I raised my children and paid for the roof over their head and the food in their fridge

Why a bit defensive though if you’re so proud? This is the part I don’t understand, why others choices seen to be taken so personally

People on here often say "what would happen if all the dad's wanted to be stay at home parents too". But they don't want to, do they? Most of them don't. It's not the same, they haven't physically been attached to the developing baby for 9 months, gone through birth or breast fed. I'm sorry, but why do we pretend men have exactly the same feelings as us? I'm pretty sure they can't have. I agree with @Contrarymary30

100%

I was wondering when someone would say that parents who use childcare are getting someone else to "bring up their child." They are using childcare, they haven't had the kid adopted.