I was so tired, but so happy, now i’m just so tired

[Whereisthegrassasgreen]

When Dd was smaller and I was fortunate enough to be with her until school at 5. I just loved the life so much, all the friends meet ups, the days out, the baking and crafts at home, the little shows and sitting cuddled up.
She’s now 7, i’m back at work, life doesn’t have anywhere near the same fulfilment or happiness

Was that the best it could get, I got five years of my perfect life, god I miss it so much

Yes. The SAHM child rearing years were my best years, there is no getting away from that.

But you do have wonderful years ahead as your DD grows and develops her personality.

sending love - it’s hard - there is so much to look forward with your little one but you have to plan it, rather than it just being normality. i can tell you that it has given me so much joy to see my child blossom with her peers. 💐💐💐

Being a parent is not just about the bit before school. You’ve years and years ahead of you to enjoy. You’ll look at your dc when they’re 18 and think “Wow, I did that”.

I think it’s really sad to think that you can only feel fulfilled at being a parent because you took them to groups as a toddler. There’s so much more to it than that.

And fwiw it’s great you’ve gone back to work.

YANBU at all! DD is 4 months old and I am seriously seriously thinking about not returning to work. I have never been this happy or appreciated life this much. Honestly for me, it cannot get better than this. I can’t understand why people complain so much and can’t wait to return to work. Each day with her is better than the last, I cannot even contemplate returning to the miserable corporate world and not being with my baby girlie every day.

Yes, I had 3 months stress leave last year. It was so lovely, enjoying coffee with friends, doing school drops and pick ups.

Baking making lovely dinners - Oh to win th lottery and just enjoy my life

Are you working full time? I found working part time was a good balance for me that gave me days with my kids but also the benefits of working.

It wasn’t just about taking them to groups as a toddler? There was much more to it, I enjoyed being with her all the time, watching her grow, teaching her, being in our own little world a lot of the time, breastfeeding..all of it

Definitely not BU, I’ve had several times where I took a few months off from the corporate grind between jobs, sometimes for travel or just to take a break. It was fabulous.

Some of us just prefer a simpler way of life, or not having most of our day dictated by the office.

I’d happily be a lady who lunches if I could afford it - sadly I have rent and bills to pay.

But this was exactly my point.

There is so, so much more to come. Honestly the bit before school is the start of it.

That’s so lovely 💓 if you can, I would stay off as long as you can, such a cliche, but it does really go so fast

I think it's lovely to hear this. I feel so sad when people are breaking up and it's all I sacrificed my career to bring up his children, my pension is less/I missed promotion etc. Having those years with your child, loving that time is such a privilege.

There will be other great times, mum and teenage daughter on holiday in Paris is one I remember fondly. It won't be the same but it will be good.

Yes I think this all the time too. Everything feels so rushed now, even when I’m with her, there is often work commitments in the background or we have clubs or she goes to friends houses. I know this is all fantastic and wonderful for her, I just miss the way it was and didn’t realise it went that quickly

I work part time, but I still feel life is so rushed these days

I completely understand, OP- my kids are young adults now but I still remember how wonderful that time was. It goes so fast.

Obviously it's a cliche but all you can do is remember that you'll also look back on this time as having gone too fast, so try to enjoy the moment rather than spending it in regret.

Yes I had to work, I think one of my saddest memories is lying on the bed, hugging my eight month old DD and begging her to forgive me for going back to work the next day. God my eyes are filling up thinking about it and she's a mum now. I think she's forgiven me.

What else is to come that’s better? Asking that genuinely as it would be good to look forward to. I love her at this age and every age of course, but everything was just so magical back then

You will see her becoming the woman you've helped her to be.

But remember you have your financial security now.

Are you one and done? Sounds like you love the baby/toddler age.

My little boy is 19 months, I've always tried to appreciate every moment and never wished time away.

I loved being a SAHM . And while DH made good money to afford it we also made sacrifices to enable it . So no holidays for awhile but I didn't really feel the need for one and DH was just happy to be off work . Plus youngest was a terrible traveller so not a pleasant time anyway . Drove a cheap car , made do with things I had so no replacing furniture or buying unnecessary stuff . It was great and yes the happiest time of my life .

I think the bits you enjoy most are really personal. Personally I love the teenage years where it's more about nudging them in the right direction and you can have more grown up conversations. I love a gossip with dd. Others like squishy babies and cute toddlers. There's no rules except everything changes just as you think you've got the hang of it.

I've found having the space to rediscover who I am really important as dd has grown. I've remembered I'm ambitious and creative and got these aspects of my life back on track. Because I'm earning more and work full time dh does (more than) his fair share and I can afford a weekly cleaner.

The years you loved will live on in your memory and your relationship. If you let that grow and flourish there's great times ahead. Different but wonderful.

Oh OP, it’s tough going back to work at whatever stage and takes a while to find your groove. I’m loving half term this week, and I’ve only had two days off with DC but wow have we had a blast!!

I struggled with infertility for years before having Dd. I have a frozen embryo from when I was younger but i’m 48 now

Yes we were exactly the same, cut back on everything but it was fine

OP, you've got some wonderful times ahead with your Dd. You don't realise how lucky you are. I've loved every stage of my DC's growing up. They were both really good kids, and now they're lovely lovely adults. Don't be sad about time you can't get back. Look forward to what's to come.