I was so tired, but so happy, now i’m just so tired

[Whereisthegrassasgreen]

When Dd was smaller and I was fortunate enough to be with her until school at 5. I just loved the life so much, all the friends meet ups, the days out, the baking and crafts at home, the little shows and sitting cuddled up.
She’s now 7, i’m back at work, life doesn’t have anywhere near the same fulfilment or happiness

Was that the best it could get, I got five years of my perfect life, god I miss it so much

YANBU!

One of the huge benefits I found was the home educating was spending so much of the first 16 years of my DCs lives with them. Precious memories.

This
It's very important that people feel comfortable with saying that returning to work for whatever reason was the right choice.
And for people to say that they found parenting hard work, lonely and isolating. And they didn't always enjoy it.
I truly understood how nice it can be to spend time with your babies and young children and not have to work but for others it isn't always a positive experience. Children can also benefit from spending time with someone other than their parents and feel proud that their parents have worked to support them.
Each situation is different and it's important to not lose sight of yourself when you are a parent. Parenting is all consuming and it's to the advantage of all (including relationships) that your entire life and individuality isn't drowned by parenting.

@Whereisthegrassasgreen Maybe that will be the best time of your life for you

I mean, everyone's got to have one bit that's the best haven't they

But life does move on and that doesn't mean life isn't good anymore. Just different. And there's still good things.

I guess it's just very different for you because you went from never working for all those years to working so you'll really feel the difference.

(Fwiw I loved the early years too although I worked 2 days a week so I always had both worlds). I work more days now)

Yep, I feel the same way op.

I didn't even want children initially, I had fun in my teens and 20's doing just what I wanted then something hit me at 27 and I knew I wanted a family. It took me a while to get pregnant and I eventually had my two dc in my 30's. Due to some work issues I ended up becoming a SAHM for a year or two but that turned into 10 years by choice because I loved it so much.

My kids are 18 and 21 now and they are fantastic humans and I have a great relationship with them. I work and have my own life but nothing, absolutely nothing compares to those wonderful days when I was able to spend all of that time with them in their younger years.

It's not everyone's cup of tea but I regret not a single moment. Those 10 years were and will probably always be the single most happiest decade of my life (even better than those carefree teens and 20's years where I had a blast).

My second starts school in September and I feel very similar. I will be going full time after 8 years of part time and being with my DD and DS. I know the days will be long and hectic and I will miss the slower pace and being with my kids so much. Unfortunately financially it has to be done. Sigh.

But loads of us are working from home now?

I did not enjoy the first few years. I was so tired and bored. Loved 6 to 12 and then I liked the teen years the best. There are plenty of good years ahead!

Agree with all this!

I’m no spring chicken and had a baby relatively recently, the part of the city I live in a fair few of my mum friends have just had babies at 45 and one of my six year olds best friends had him at 50. Sure it varies lots across the nation but not that unusual where I’m from! X

I’ve been a SAHM since my little boy was born and it has 100% been the best part of my life so far ♥️ He will be 5 in August and should be starting school but it’s been difficult to find one (he has autism and is still waiting for an EHCP). We are still meeting with schools at the moment and trying to find one that will accept flexischooling as he isn’t ready for full time yet so I think we will have a bit more time in the years of being together a lot of the time (he’s currently at nursery 2 days a week and if we manage to find a school that will do flexischooling he will most likely go 3 days a week) and if not we will home educate until he gets his EHCP ♥️

Personally I loved it from 6 or 7 onwards best, with the teen years being my absolute favourite era.
Now the ' boys' are adults i love this as well!

Hope you know this ABBA song OP
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hRr7qRb-7k4&ra=m

Totally understand. I’ve never been mad about babies but when I had my own I was like: THIS IS IT!!!! They’re 3 and 5 now and I just want to be a housewife and spend all my time with them- I’m part time, but I don’t give a shit about work. I just feel so happy and fulfilled pottering with my girls

It’s exactly this x

Yes! 🙌

The greatest gift a parent can give their child is their time and their attention.

You know that and understand it and you feel grief for a time when you could give her more time and not be controlled by the need for money and future-proofing your life.

This isn't an argument for or against SAHM or working full time.

It's the quality of the time and the attention that you give them that makes the difference - and if we're honest, we'd all love to have the CHOICE to work or not work, to choose where we spend our time. Isn't that the greatest gift? Choosing how we spend our time and with whom.

Is home educating an option for you? Particularly if there's a strong home ed community in your local area? I don't do it, but have a lot of friends who do and it really works for them.

Yee I bawl my eyes out every time

Not to read too much into those three dots but do you think transferring the embryo would give you closure?

Financially no sadly

I feel 48 is maybe too old?

Some of us just prefer a simpler way of life, or not having most of our day dictated by the office.

🤣🤣🤣🤣 Well, wouldn't we all! Sadly, those bills won't pay themselves.

YANBU. I loved the early years with mine. I think my favourite age is 3-7 ish when they are cute and cuddly and want to be with you all the time. They’re still lovely after that though and there is more fun to be had!

I have always worked though (out of necessity). Completely loved mat leave and would probably choose to be a SAHM.
However I think it is good to role model working to children.

I would have given anything to be able to be a stay at home mum when mine were little. I only worked part time but honestly hated being away from the with a passion and would have done almost anything not to have to do the juggling act that is work and kids.

you had a lovely 5 years with your dd and I get you not wanting to end. 7 is a tricky age as they’re still small, but kind of not small enough for many to justify staying home still. I got by by making the absolute most of the time I had with them. Always had fun stuff planned, whether that was going out or at home.

that said. Once they got to secondary and didn’t need me as much I think I would have always wanted to go back to work. Now I work full time as the dds are young adults. These days I enjoy spending time with them but we all have our own lives and I’m not sure what I’d do with myself if I didn’t work.

Not too old.