AIBU to think that clothes shopping in person as a plus sized woman is now impossible?

[FatFuckerFrances]

I was in Oxford Street today. Usually I can go into M & S and find clothes in a size 22 to try on. Today, there was one pair of black trousers in a size 24. Everything else was a size 20 or smaller. Mostly smaller. Even ranges like Seasalt, which goes up to size 28, only go up to a 16 or 18 in store. Same for John Lewis. Nothing above size 18.

A few weeks ago, I was in M & S, bought two dresses, a top and pair of jeans, and tried on a load more stuff. Asked a member of staff, who said “you’ll just have to click and collect.” Same in John Lewis, which until a few weeks ago stocked a small amount of one plus sized range, Live Unlimited. They now only do this online.

So now, if I want to buy clothes, I have to go through the faff of click and collect, try them on in the fitting room and then queue up to get a refund on what doesn’t fit. The option of browsing, and trying on clothes like a normal person is no longer available to me. The only shop I can go to is Beige, which is out of my price range. How is this fair? I still need clothes! And there seemed to be plenty of sizes 6 and 8 in stock, so it’s not as if they are only stocking sizes 10-16.

But I think even people of smaller sizes have problems too. I am a size 6 shoe and mostly a size 10, sometimes a size 12 in clothes which must be the most common sizes for women in the type of shops I shop at. The amount of times I see something I like the look of and they only have tiny sizes (6/8) and larger sizes because the regular sizes are out of stock (I am talking about regular stock as well, not the sale rail). It happens so frequently, it becomes pointless to shop as you don't get access to the full range so I usually end up having to go online and order it anyway.

I think we all tend to notice things from our own perspective and what we are looking for. From my point of view there only ever seems to be large sizes and tiny sizes left of the rail, but I won't notice which specific large sizes there are, which might not be the ones you want. From your point of view you notice the lack of large sizes and think it's all full of regular sizes, and won't notice the lack of the size I might be looking for.

I think the sales indicate what sizes are popular. It's hard to find nice things in the sale when you are a size 10 in clothes and a size 6 in shoes. It's always the smallest and largest sizes that are left at the end, demonstrating they don't sell well to begin with

Agree with others that shopping in person is very frustrating for pretty much everyone now.

If you’re a smaller than average or larger than average size it’s hard to find what you need. If you’re an average size, things sell out quickly. If you’re tall or petite not only do you have to order online, but most shops don’t even stock tall or petite ranges so you’re limited in choice. And places that do stock those ranges often make assumptions about your other dimensions. Being short does not mean you’re thin. Being 6ft does not mean you’re overweight. If you have bigger boobs, nothing is styled to fit and completely alters the look of a top or dress.

As far as I can tell, it’s lousy for most people in some way or another.

This is the same for everyone though. Mostly if you want something specific you have to order online.

In fact people at the ends of the range of sizes probably benefit from the most common sizes selling out first.

I shop regularly in Sainsbury's and generally have a look at the Sale Rail clothes in the TU section. There are generally larger size clothes there including sze 22 .

I'm not saying they are necessarily very nice items btw but they definitely are there whereas my size isn't!

So you’re more concerned with what other people see than with who you actually are? That’s sad.

The only shop I can find trousers short enough to fit me (5’1) is M&S, and all their summer styles this year are huge baggy wide ones that make me look like coco the clown. Who decided we want to walk around in enough material to make a tent?? ( sorry, slightly off topic)

Why is the op being entitled? I also don’t understand why you’re rolling your eyes.

M&S + Oxford street isn’t a location where a lot if obese/overweight people would shop.
Central London professionals tend to be well paid (or more likely to go to Primark etc), and as such have access to Wegovy etc.
You are better off trying shops further out.
Its supply and demand, and the number of overweight/obese people in central London offices has sharply declined in my experience.

I don't think the economy 101 some posters mention here explains it. Surely, if the bigger sizes sold out first, it would make economical sense to stock more of them (at least for some models).

The economy here is somehow screwed up. The shops are stocked in a batch and than allowed to run our of the pieces and sizes people would like to buy, left dry and virtually empty (of anything they could actually sell to their actual customers), sometimes for weeks.

I remember desperate shop assistants asking people for their shoe sizes and telling them there is nothing in their size in stock and they are sorry, but they don't know when new stuff will come.

Of course there is economical behaviour on the side of the chains in the end, but it's unintuitive and desperate.
Global delivery chain disruptions making less predictable when the things will arrive. It's hard to get manufacturing consistency over the time, so there are more short term collections and less stable lines (where it would be possible to restock and react on actual demand over time). It's cheaper to manufacture in a hit and miss style and destroy unsold stuff than to aim for consistency an stocking things people would actually want to buy.

True, wealthier people are less likely to be obese generally.

Do you feel good about yourself now, @ThisOliveKoala?

It's been like this forever for tall people, it's always only online and always has been.

So what you’re saying is that you’re horrible and overweight?

It not entitled to expect stores to stock a decent range of clothes in all sizes! That’s literally their job - to sell clothes!!

See I can never find size 8.

Shops only carry the middle of the range. Try shopping for smaller sizes too. My teen dd is a 0. Cannot find anything in a shop less than a 6 or an 8. It’s a nightmare.

Yes, and if you happen to have the audacity to be both tall and fat you have literally no options, because the places that do tall ranges generally stop them at size 18.

cant believe nearly half the people who voted thing the OP is unreasonable!

I agree with this.

Large out of town Sainsbury's are excellent for clothes shopping in a hurry. We have often picked up good stuff along with a food shop on our way to a UK holiday. Presumably due to their huge size and need to keep the food stocked up, they seem actually better than clothes retailers at keeping stocked up.

Yet remarks like that tend to out you as horrible sadly!

I’m tall and fat! Agree, it’s impossible in-store! However, the advent of the weight loss drug has meant rich pickings for plus size women on Vinted! Especially if you know which brands suit your shape. The problem with Vinted though is you can’t tell the length of the trousers unless you are familiar with a certain shop.

everything is online now op, try in comfort of own home and usually easy returns.

im an 8, was in markies last weekend, and they had two items literally in my size, of the dozen or so things I liked, everything else was a 10 or above, and mainly 12-16. Could have sold out, who knows. It’s just pot luck basically,

I seldom shop in stores, and prefer on line, I just happened to be in there with my husband, had a nose round, anything I thought was nice, they didn’t have my size, apart from those two items.

i don’t have an issue with it, I can order to home to try on, or click and collect. As floor space is at a premium, anything they have out there needs to sell, so they will always put the sizes that sell the most out, I would too if I was them, and other sizes they may or may not have out, but could sell out quicker.

So fucking rude and uncalled for.

I think the “normal person” has for a long time preferred getting their clothes online and trying them on at home to be honest. I can’t think of anything worse that trying stuff on in a shop changing room.

Same issue here. I find it soul destroying to go shopping, I'm tall for life (unfortunately) and have no way to change it but am not catered for in any physical stores even in major cities!

Easy, size up or down! No matter what your size, we all find it difficult. If your preferred shop doesn't have your desired size, disappointing as it is, shop elsewhere. It's not anyone else's problem.

People being unkind about it is absolutely normal even if unpleasant

So you agree it’s not pleasant but you went ahead anyway. For your information, in case you genuinely don’t know, that isn’t normal actually. It’s just a very shitty thing to do.

Why are you on a thread about plus sized people of they disgust you so much? Why comment at all?