My boyfriend

[Denisa2024]

My boyfriend and I were thinking about getting married. He was hoping he wasn’t still married, even though he never signed any papers after many years apart. His ex-wife has moved on with a new boyfriend and they have a little girl together.

My boyfriend and this woman aren’t divorced yet, and I later found out she’s low on money and waiting for him to finalise the divorce. I’m also wondering — is my boyfriend the legal father of her daughter, even if he’s not the biological dad?

Thanks!

Your boyfriend sounds like a complete loser if he is ‘hoping’ he’s no longer married, but has done sod all about getting a divorce.
You need to be eyes wide open about the sort of man you are planning to marry. He’s useless, and it will be on you to think, organise and do everything.

See you in a few years, on here moaning about having to carry the full weight of your married life with two kids your partner can’t remember the names of. Good luck!

He sounds a catch.

I can't even.

Do you think CBT might help you? Or maybe taking up a hobby? Crochet perhaps?

If someone is stupid enough not to know if they are divorced or not then the last thing you need to do is to be marrying them. If he's not the biological dad then unless he adopted the child then he's not the legal dad either. You also seem a bit dim - sorry - if you don't know this. Are you both very young or just not even remotely switched on?

I like the idea that you can just hope for a marriage to wear off with time.

Did he actually have the mental capacity to get married in the first place?

about:blank source:%20Mumsnet
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is this you?

He was hoping he's still not married.

He sounds really independent and responsible, what a catch!

this is a very odd post. You don't sound old enough for marriage.

He believes divorces can happen by two people having the intention and manifesting it?

Nah, you need to sign something.

He needs a divorce and a financial settlement ... otherwise she could come after any future assets he has, including a new marital home!

If the mother put him on the birth certificate then he would be the legal dad - and she could have done that since they are still married. I'm not saying she did, just saying it's possible

He doesn't sound too bright, are you sure you want to marry an idiot?

Yes that's a fair point - but surely he would also know if he was on it because it doesn't sound like he knows either?!