He's going under the patio

[RessicaJabbit]

DH bought the wrong bacon...cheap watery crap 😭😭😭

Wow five whole adults! You must be right then. All the best scientific studies in history have had at least five adults involved so you must be right!

Surely you mean Brookside

Exactly

OFFS lighten up. How fucking tedious. And it's from Brookside, nothing to do with Fred and Rose.

It's trevor jordache going under mandy's patio!!🤣🤣🤣🤣

Once planned on homemade salmon and watercress fish cakes for tea.
Dh bought a tub of salad cress...
He was a big man and the patio isn't quite level...

Dont rub it in, isn't OP suffering enough?

Brookside is the reference , just for clarity. Nothing to do with FW . Maybe it was before your time .

I agree. I cringe whenever I read this. It isn't funny because there are too many real life examples of men actually doing this to women.

In my circle, we use the verb ‘to jordache’ to describe this kind of situation. Subpar bacon is most definitely a jordaching offence.

Sterling work to jump in with 'Do you realise' only to be told repeatedly that your pompous correction was wrong 🤣

Go and preach at some actual men about their actual violence, instead of taking the easy way out and pontificating at women.

🥱

Remember to bury him deeper than 6 feet, few feet of dirt, animal bones (from your local butcher) and then fill the rest in, THEN lay the patio. Just to make sure you don’t get caught. Bacon in prison is bad.

(Not a serial killer but dedicated criminal minds/true crime podcast person)

I am a whole adult and my immediate point of reference for this is Brookside.

@RessicaJabbit

definitely. Get your 🐷 in a row

I’ve just asked all the adults in my house and they said Brookside. The cat looked at me as if I was crazy though so clearly he needs to spend some time watching 90s soaps!

I can't believe someone derailed a funny thread 5 post in, people DIED 🙄. Well I laughed and yes brookside did it first 🤣. LTB not to be confused with BLT 🐷😆👍. Criminal.

No wonder pingu is miserable in your house 🙄 🐧

Right back to the thread ,was it unsmoked bacon? because if it was i’m with you.

It's absolutely Brookside. Can see where the Fred West confusion comes from but it did make me laugh (sorry).

I haven’t even thought it could be as bad as unsmoked!!

I’m having work done in the garden. It’s halted for winter, but have a new patio that needs to be done in the Spring. Maybe give him a couple of months to redeem himself - ‘it’s the season and all that. But if not, I may be able to offer space if needed.

Re the bacon, I’m very particular. Needs to be smoked. And needs to be medallions, all the bacon and non of the gross fat/rind. Anything less and my patio is readily available (space permitting).

Have this post deleted IMMEDIATELY. If for some strange reason some dies actually kill him and buries him under the patio, you're going to be the prime suspect.

The "Brookside body under the patio" refers to the 1993 storyline in the British soap opera Brookside where the Jordache family buried the body of abusive husband and father, Trevor Jordache, under their patio

That's where it comes from