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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU: Elderly parents do not care about their impact on the environment

481 replies

Scientistathome · 27/08/2023 08:07

My elderly parents acknowledge (in passing) that the human impact on the planet is destructive and that their family's future could be jeopardized.
However, they refuse to do anything about it. They burn gas and electricity in summer to keep warm (extra jumper? Nooo!), Will not Install solar panels (they can afford it), take unnecessary flights, ... the list goes on.
They flaty refuse to change any habits despite that they know they should and could.
I get quite mad with them!
AIBU?
I know it is their choice, not mine but it affects all of us (their grandchildren are quite disgusted with them).
Are other people's parents like this?
(I know that some parents cannot afford eco-friendly choices like solar panels)

OP posts:
yogasaurus · 27/08/2023 08:09

I can afford solar panels, I don’t want them thank you. And who decides if a flight is ‘unnecessary’, you?

This type of hectoring is what turns people off from listening

LauraNorda · 27/08/2023 08:11

The best thing they could have done for the environment was not have any children.

fedupnow2 · 27/08/2023 08:11

Yabu. Even your kids are disgusted, sounds like this rubbed off from you? Is this only reserved for your parents because they can afford it and not for those who can't. And why only the elderly?

TheBeesKnee · 27/08/2023 08:11

So you're telling them to stop going on holiday and carry out major changes to their property, and they don't engage?

Can't imagine why 🙄

fedupnow2 · 27/08/2023 08:11

LauraNorda · 27/08/2023 08:11

The best thing they could have done for the environment was not have any children.

Good point. You are the biggest hypocrite op!

sweeneytoddsrazor · 27/08/2023 08:12

How often do you drive rather than use public transport?

Toottooot · 27/08/2023 08:12

Wooptie fucking ping.

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 27/08/2023 08:12

Have you never been on a plane? All flights are unnecessary? Do you have solar panels? Drive a car?

your parents sound like the vast majority of us (including, I’ll hazard a guess… you and your children who are so disgusted by them)

MagpiePi · 27/08/2023 08:13

Their actions are not going to make a jot of difference to the environment.

Strugglingtodomybest · 27/08/2023 08:13

How old are they? The only people I know with the heating on during the summer are in their 90s, so if they're that old I'd say you were being unreasonable to think they're going to change their ways now.

I'd advise spending your energy getting annoyed with, say for example, the Indian government for burning all that fuel going to the moon rather than your elderly parents.

MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 27/08/2023 08:13

If every single person on the planet reduced their personal carbon footprint to zero the effect would be negligible.

Selfesteem23 · 27/08/2023 08:14

Well to be fair half the planet don’t really seem arsed about climate change. Taking action is a lot more than not putting heating on. I do what I can but until big businesses and governments sort themselves out, rich people on flights like taking a taxi and so on it’s a drop in the ocean isn’t it.

Ragwort · 27/08/2023 08:14

I am being light hearted but my elderly DM drives me mad by being completely the opposite ... refuses to put the heating on in the day (she is 90.& understandably feels the cold), wraps herself up in an old blanket in the evenings and insists 'she's fine' but the blanket is a real trip hazard. Only uses a hot water bottle in bed ... she could easily afford to spend more on heating.
Worries endlessly about how to dispose of the smallest thing to ensure it's properly recycled .. I know that's admirable but no need to be so careful all the time when it is causing anxiety, I frequently have to remove things from her home and tell I that I will dispose of it properly.

cptartapp · 27/08/2023 08:15

It's personal risk v benefit isn't it? At that age, I'd probably do the same.

Aprilx · 27/08/2023 08:15

You do you.

I will put the heating on if I am cold. I don’t want solar panels, they are ugly. And I take flights to go on holiday, because I want to. And I couldn’t give a stuff if your offspring are disgusted.

Why did you feel the need to mentioned your parents are “elderly” by the way? And why are you asking if other people’s parents are similar?

LuciferRising · 27/08/2023 08:16

Many people are like this, not just your elderly parents. Just look at all forms of over consumption - stuff, devices, holidays, food - and think about what that means. Production, packaging, transportation. People need to reduce, not recycle.

I'm included in this.

Knackeredhamster · 27/08/2023 08:16

Toottooot · 27/08/2023 08:12

Wooptie fucking ping.

😂

Knackeredhamster · 27/08/2023 08:18

In the spirit of the old school AIBU

The answer is

Yes

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 27/08/2023 08:19

I assume that you have done everything that you possibly can to reduce your own environmental impact, given that you feel entitled to judge your parents?

So I'm guessing that you're vegan, childfree, live in a completely sustainable home, never fly/drive etc. And that you put reducing your own footprint at the centre of all your decisions.

If that's the case, then yanbu to be annoyed by your parents' failure to make an effort. If not, then you're a hypocrite, I'm afraid.

Cosycover · 27/08/2023 08:20

So that's who's to blame for climate change then! We finally found them. Thanks for the heads up.

PosterBoy · 27/08/2023 08:20

My kids are appalling - want to be driven everywhere, change phones every 2 years, new clothes, heating on high.
My parents are absolute Scrooges in comparison.

Weird

ShellySarah · 27/08/2023 08:21

Do you and your disgusted children have smartphones, laptops, TVs? do they walk everywhere, never use plastic, compost everything?

If you cared about the environment, you wouldn't have had children. (I don't have any.)

This type of hectoring is what turns people off from listening.

RandomUsernameHere · 27/08/2023 08:21

Are they actually that bad though? Most people don't have solar panels, and all flights are unnecessary really.

HellonHeels · 27/08/2023 08:22

Kill them to save the world OP

TheBarbieEffect · 27/08/2023 08:23

YABU and your kids sound really rude.

You’d hate me, I don’t even recycle 😂

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