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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DSIL has ruined my hair

30 replies

emimart · 30/07/2023 16:35

Dsil has done my hair today and I think she's messed it up. I've had foils done and a toner put on but it's WAY too ashy and it's greyish in some places. Sorry I don't know if I'm explaining it well.

It just looks a mess and I don't think she knew how to sort it. She's told me to wash it again and it will fade eventually but I don't know if it will.

Anybody any advice?

OP posts:
liondreams · 30/07/2023 16:36

go to the hairdresser

fifte · 30/07/2023 16:38

Keep washing it. Toners are only demi/semi permanent so yes it will fade

Guiltyfeethavegotnorhythm0 · 30/07/2023 16:38

I wouldn't take hair advice from a random on the 'net . So I also second seeing a hairdresser , if you can .

Original poster
emimart · 30/07/2023 16:39

If I wash it now will it make any difference ar all?

OP posts:
Planetegg · 30/07/2023 16:42

You could try a clarifying shampoo, that might take some of the toner out quicker.
toners do usually fade quite fast though, the colour will likely warm back up with tap water washing and sunshine. I’m not a hairdresser though….

Dearly89 · 30/07/2023 16:42

Buy this!!! Infuse My. Colour Gold Shampoo 250ml amzn.eu/d/8jdLKBO
Exact same thing happened to me.
Lather loads into your hair and leave it for a few minutes then rinse
Repeat until it's how you want it, it'll warm the colour

Original poster
emimart · 30/07/2023 16:45

Anybody know why it would only be ashy at the roots? The ends are lovely, it's just the bloody top that is completely awful.

OP posts:
ThreeLittleDots · 30/07/2023 16:45

Heat from heat caused the toner to develop too much

ThreeLittleDots · 30/07/2023 16:46

*head

fifte · 30/07/2023 16:46

emimart · 30/07/2023 16:45

Anybody know why it would only be ashy at the roots? The ends are lovely, it's just the bloody top that is completely awful.

The roots lighten quicker with bleach due to the heat from your scalp

Original poster
emimart · 30/07/2023 16:48

So how could it have been avoided? Or could it not have been? I usually to go to the salon where she works but we did it at home this time, and this never happened there so I don't understand what has gone wrong this time.

OP posts:
fifte · 30/07/2023 16:52

Well without seeing her technique or your hair it's impossible to say. She either has lightened your roots too much or just left the toner on too long. You'll find out once the toner has washed out a bit

Original poster
emimart · 30/07/2023 17:09

I've just washed it 2-3 times in the shower, not feeling hopeful it will look any different yet but we'll see

OP posts:
boboshmobo · 30/07/2023 17:10

Toner makes my hair grey , just keep washing it

Is she actually a hair dresser?

Original poster
emimart · 30/07/2023 17:12

Yeah she is actually a hair dresser but recently qualified (in the last 2 years) she doesn't have tons of experience just yet.

OP posts:
Original poster
emimart · 30/07/2023 17:13

Hairs been lovely everytime I've had it done at the salon by her but really not happy this time. Makes it harder as well because she's family I don't want to hurt her feelings by telling her.

OP posts:
1037370E · 30/07/2023 17:20

emimart · 30/07/2023 17:13

Hairs been lovely everytime I've had it done at the salon by her but really not happy this time. Makes it harder as well because she's family I don't want to hurt her feelings by telling her.

If she's a half decent hairdresser, she will know that it isn't right - she should be fixing/resolving the issue without you having to ask.

Original poster
emimart · 30/07/2023 17:23

@1037370E her resolution was just to tell me that it'll be fine after a few washes, which I'm hoping it will be, but it just looks really too light at the roots

OP posts:
Emma543 · 30/07/2023 17:27

Hey!
I had platinum hair and every appointment used to come out with blue roots until my first wash. It just grabs more in some places but get a bit of head and shoulders on it and mine used to wash out fine :)

Londontown12 · 30/07/2023 17:33

Actually if u wash it now it will wash out fast because it takes about 3 days for cuticles to close after bleaching that’s why us hairdressers say try not to wash for 3 days after bleaching x

Patsy321 · 30/07/2023 17:33

Dearly89 · 30/07/2023 16:42

Buy this!!! Infuse My. Colour Gold Shampoo 250ml amzn.eu/d/8jdLKBO
Exact same thing happened to me.
Lather loads into your hair and leave it for a few minutes then rinse
Repeat until it's how you want it, it'll warm the colour

I second this recommendation! Had same happen to me at hairdressers - asked for touch up of warm blonde roots, ended up grey / ash blonde - told myself wasn’t too bad, until partner first saw it and asked did I intentionally want grey hair!!! This stuff fixed it brilliantly and gave it a gorgeous highlight finish in the end!! Order it next day delivery!

Original poster
emimart · 30/07/2023 17:34

@Hairobsessed123 ooos I've washed, should I have waited then?

OP posts:
Londontown12 · 30/07/2023 17:35

No washing it now will fade toner faster x

Londontown12 · 30/07/2023 17:35

But usually will hair your pleased with leave it as long as u can x

TheKeatingFive · 30/07/2023 17:37

I never understand the point of toners. Yet I get talked into one at the hairdresser every time. They do fade though.