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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Doctors ignoring me for a year and now it's come to this

380 replies

Laurawharton · 05/02/2023 03:46

Aibu to think I should go to a and e tomorrow (really don't want to as I know they are busy) or just face the fact that no one cares
Had a lump appear by my eye last Christmas. I thought it was a spot until it didn't move for 3 months so phoned the doctors who wouldn't see me face to face but told me that it would need to be off in a strict 6 month time scale if it's not gone by then. 6 months later I phoned to say it's still there and now larger. I had a different doctor who basically said 'and why are you telling us that go private it's cosmetic'. Phoned again to get a face to face as everyone was screaming cancer at me, finally got a face to face and told they don't know what it is but yeah go private to have it off or join a over 2 year waiting list.
Anyway about a month ago it grew big again so phoned them as I was concerned as it's so close to my eye and was starting to mess with my vision and give me headache and that side of my face kept going numb. They said they referred me but still heard nothing. Now it's the size of a golf ball red and angry closing up half my eye. Swollen both my eye lid and my under eye. Painful as hell I Carnt sleep don't want to eat, put it this way I was a size 16 now even size ten is a bit big on me. I Carnt sleep properly, people keep staring at me when I go out so I no longer want to leave the house. I saw the doctor again and all he said was he will send fresh pictures along to my referral.
I don't know what to do I'm scared I'm going to blind in one eye due to the pressure and I'm not sure how my face will now look after it's gone if they ever get round to it. How long can they leave me in this much pain.
Is it worth just going down a and e and seeing if they will do anything? my partner has already stopped me twice from taking matters into my own hands aka self removal. My thinking was if I mess up they will have to something, I know it's not the right thing to do but I'm so scared and in so much pain.

OP posts:
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itsjustnotok · 05/02/2023 20:51

@Laurawharton I showed DH your picture, he’s an A&E nurse and he told me that he wouldn’t have any issue with you going to A&E with your symptoms and would happily try to help. Hope you get seen soon

2Rebecca · 05/02/2023 20:54

I would gp OOH GP. They have appointments rather than hanging around for hours and can prescribe antibiotics or if they think it does need A&E phone up for a professional to professional referral and you bypass the queues of people at A&E who should have phoned the out of hours GP service,

MyStarBoy · 05/02/2023 21:06

A&E please

Pulpfan78 · 05/02/2023 21:08

This reply has been deleted

Please start your own thread :-)

LookItsMeAgain · 05/02/2023 21:11

@Pulpfan78 - you might want to start your own thread rather than post in this one about your issue.

plumduck · 05/02/2023 21:12

Laurawharton · 05/02/2023 10:43

Some people wanted a picture for proof so here's the last one I sent to the doctor and it's only getting worse by the day unfortunately. I'm getting ready to go to a and e now as I thought I'd at least wait for partner to wake up before disappearing 😆he thinks I should phone 111 before though just incase I'm wasting my time going to a and e

Bloody hell OP! You poor thing! Please keep pushing to be seen.

Pulpfan78 · 05/02/2023 21:13

LookItsMeAgain · 05/02/2023 21:11

@Pulpfan78 - you might want to start your own thread rather than post in this one about your issue.

Mistake... thanks 😊

Pinkfluff76 · 05/02/2023 21:44

wtaf your Dr’s should’ve sorted this out urgently ages ago! Phone them everyday!!

Manicwithmoney · 05/02/2023 22:09

Laurawharton · 05/02/2023 05:39

Unfortunately I'm in the Midlands with only buses for transport I think the first bus is at 10 due to it being sunday

Where abouts in the midlands are you? Leicester and Nottingham both have an eye casualty/a&e. I suspect Birmingham will too!

Chupney · 05/02/2023 22:15

I get you wanting to go to A&E because your GP isn't actually listening to you. Whilst I agree it isn't an accident or emergency I am astounded at the idea that a GP could look at that and not think it's something that needed treating! It's massive, on your face, causing pain and vision issues. Honestly go back to the GP and say you can't seriously expect me to go around indefinitely with this painful disfiguring lump on my face! A&E no but definitely something that needs dealing with asap.

StarbucksSmarterSister · 05/02/2023 22:33

You're in pain, your face is going numb, it's affecting your vision and you've lost so much weight you've dropped four dress sizes? Demand a face to face and if you don't get one tomorrow go to the UTC or A&E.

Ignore people trying to make you feel bad, they're not doctors.

BHRK · 05/02/2023 22:50

go to A&E, and then complain to your GP practice. Awful experience.
and I’m someone who never says go to A&E

Tandora · 05/02/2023 22:57

AtrociousCircumstance · 05/02/2023 11:41

Lots of unqualified medical advice here OP.

It’s a massive angry lump near your eye and it needs to be dealt with. You’ve already been patient and tried to deal with it via GP. You’re in pain and you don’t know what exactly it is. Go and get it checked out.

100% this. OP go to A&E, you don’t need to be walking around with a large painful lump on your face that is having an effect on your vision and mental health. go to A&E. worst that can happen is they do nothing. Hopefully that won’t be the case,

catsonahottinroof · 05/02/2023 23:04

Yes I think you should complain to your GP too. (If it turns out to be a cyst which needs draining or anything worse). Fair enough, at first if it was small and stable it was reasonable to leave it, but the GP should have said if it got worse to seek medical help and how. Then when you did go back, if it was as bad as in your photo, I feel your GP should have at least prescribed antibiotics if not sent you straight to A&E. I am basing this on my experience with my dd who had cysts on her face and neck with a very similar appearance to op's. The hospital never acted like she shouldn't be there.

Kennykenkencat · 05/02/2023 23:04

Sidge · 05/02/2023 13:44

@Kennykenkencat i think it’s you that doesn’t understand the timeline.

Spot appeared December 2021.

OP got worried around March 2022 as it was getting bigger. Spoke to doc who said see how it looks at 6 months.

Six months later (September?) it was the same so OP went back. Was told go private if possible or could join a long waiting list. OP doesn’t say what she said but assume they made a referral as when she called a month ago to report if was even bigger they said they’d referred. Essentially it’s out of the GPs hands and in the hands of dermatology.

She has then spoken to them (?recently but obviously within the last few weeks) and sent new photos which they have sent to dermatology to expedite the referral.

It now appears infected and needs to be seen again, probably at the GP tomorrow for oral antibiotics, or the GP may feel it needs incision/excision and drainage and may refer to the on call surgical team.

She HASN’T been ignored for a year. I can totally understand her distress and anxiety but she’s not being entirely clear or honest about her experience, and posters piling in and putting the fear of god into her aren’t helping.

So why didn’t they put her on the waiting list when it was small and could have taken her off if things went away.

and it is affecting her negatively and probably now needs more money spent to put right what it has affected.

I speak as someone who was left in unbearable agony for 7 years because the NHS wanted to save money on a £300 MRI. (I offered to pay for it but they refused).
Instead without any tests and just guesswork, the consultant never once looked at me. It was decided that I needed a new hip and I wasn’t going to get a new hip till I was 60.

I couldn’t work, I couldn’t sleep, my diet was terrible, I couldn’t exercise and I had 2 children with ADHD I was solely in charge of

In the end it nearly cost me my life.

I got together the money to go private as a last resort and saw an osteopath who within minutes of taking all my details said the words

Hip pain can be deferred pain from your back. Can I see your back

She then told me I had bones sticking out of my back where bones shouldn’t be sticking out

She worked on me for about 30 minutes trying to get my back better and referred me to a Bupa hospital

about 3 hours later almost by hip stopped hurting for about 30 minutes.

I went to that original hospital for 7 years and was told o wasn’t doing the physio right and I wasn’t helping myself.

Kennykenkencat · 05/02/2023 23:06

I think the NHS needs to stop trying to save money by fobbing people off. It just costs more money in the end.

mjf981 · 05/02/2023 23:15

This is concerning OP - definitely go to A and E. And really push for your own sake.
This could be abscessed growth which need draining and antibiotics. Or something more sinister which is growing and needs surgically excised asap. Someone should be doing diagnostics (taking samples) of this asap to work out what you've actually got.

XelaM · 05/02/2023 23:31

Kennykenkencat · 05/02/2023 23:06

I think the NHS needs to stop trying to save money by fobbing people off. It just costs more money in the end.

This!

UnfinishedBusiness · 06/02/2023 12:03

I hope you went and got it seen @Laurawharton

anyolddinosaur · 06/02/2023 12:33

Wondering how you are today and if any medic has actually seen you yet? If you decided not to go to out of hours gp or a&e your gp should be seeing that today.

Nocutenamesleft · 06/02/2023 12:56

StarbucksSmarterSister · 05/02/2023 22:33

You're in pain, your face is going numb, it's affecting your vision and you've lost so much weight you've dropped four dress sizes? Demand a face to face and if you don't get one tomorrow go to the UTC or A&E.

Ignore people trying to make you feel bad, they're not doctors.

Demanding anything isn't going to get you anywhere. I often wonder where this age of DEMAND they do something has come from? Go back 30 years and you'd never of gone into your doctors demanding shit.

Respect people and they respect you back.

Please dont listen to this bad bad advice.

JenniferBooth · 06/02/2023 13:04

In other words lick the GPs arse even though she has been left like this. Its not demanding to expect the service you pay for. She has had this for well over a year FFS.

SoupDragon · 06/02/2023 13:16

Nocutenamesleft · 06/02/2023 12:56

Demanding anything isn't going to get you anywhere. I often wonder where this age of DEMAND they do something has come from? Go back 30 years and you'd never of gone into your doctors demanding shit.

Respect people and they respect you back.

Please dont listen to this bad bad advice.

She did the whole respect thing and where did it get her?

Kennykenkencat · 06/02/2023 13:47

I think you have to threaten to sue if things are not attended to in a timely manner
Being respectful just means you won’t cause trouble if they ignore you

Crumpetdisappointment · 06/02/2023 15:46

it is not the fault of the GP, there is the dermatology wait.