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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ex sents heartfelt letter. Guess who's on Bumble ???

49 replies

steamingirn · 28/01/2023 12:51

So I know I should let sleeping dogs lie but I'd love a great comeback to this letter telling me how much he loves me, crying, not wanting to live but hey ho .... I just found him on bumble . AIBU to want to send a smart reply . I'm dying to ...
Please advise

OP posts:
BashfulClam · 28/01/2023 13:00

No reply is the best reply.

Original poster
steamingirn · 28/01/2023 13:13

I know but I'm itching to let him know I know! It's so insulting isn't it ?

OP posts:
SerenaTee · 28/01/2023 13:14

Screenshot of his profile with two words - this you?

LuluBlakey1 · 28/01/2023 13:15

steamingirn · 28/01/2023 13:13

I know but I'm itching to let him know I know! It's so insulting isn't it ?

No. It is just confirmation that he is a lying knob. Ignore him completely and stop looking back.

EthicalNonMahogany · 28/01/2023 13:15

He might be just calling for madder music and for stronger wine

BreviloquentBastard · 28/01/2023 13:18

Stop letting him live in your head. Presumably he's you ex for a reason, so put him in the past and leave him there. If you mention it to him all he's going to hear is "I care enough about you to know that you're on a dating app, and am upset enough about it to tell you". Is that really the message you want to be giving him right now?

isthismylifenow · 28/01/2023 13:20

I know it would give you a bit of satisfaction at the time letting him know you know.

But I think you should ignore the letter and keep the info you have tight. You don't know if a better opportunity could arise for it to come out.

Or by then you'll be in a different frame of mind, and it won't matter or hurt quite as much.

RudsyFarmer · 28/01/2023 13:21

SerenaTee · 28/01/2023 13:14

Screenshot of his profile with two words - this you?

🤣

DrManhattan · 28/01/2023 13:24

Just put 'lol'

Christmaspyjamas · 28/01/2023 13:26

I don't understand why he's not allowed on a dating site if he's your ex?

romdowa · 28/01/2023 13:28

New phone, who this?

DrManhattan · 28/01/2023 13:29

@Christmaspyjamas I think the op just wants to highlight his total lack of integrity

AdamRyan · 28/01/2023 13:29

It's infuriating isn't it?

Basically it just means they need a woman, any woman, to look after them and are simultaneously fishing in lots of pools to see who bites first.
As soon as he gets some other sucker who's interested enough he'll be back to his normal knobbish self and pretend he never sent the letter.

Just ignore it all.

LaLuz7 · 28/01/2023 13:31

Write back "LOL. No. Good luck on bumble though"

jetadore · 28/01/2023 13:32

Christmaspyjamas · 28/01/2023 13:26

I don't understand why he's not allowed on a dating site if he's your ex?

Are you really this thick or just putting it on for show? You don’t understand why him being on there AND begging to be taken back isn’t allowed?

LaLuz7 · 28/01/2023 13:33

Christmaspyjamas · 28/01/2023 13:26

I don't understand why he's not allowed on a dating site if he's your ex?

It's not being on bumble that's the issue. Its the absolute hypocrisy of begging her to get back with him while being on bumble. It's really not hard to understand why it's infuriating.

minou123 · 28/01/2023 13:35

LaLuz7 · 28/01/2023 13:33

It's not being on bumble that's the issue. Its the absolute hypocrisy of begging her to get back with him while being on bumble. It's really not hard to understand why it's infuriating.

Show quote history

I was just about to say the same thing.

NannyGythaOgg · 28/01/2023 13:47

The opposite of Love isn't hate it is indifference

Show him you don't care by not responding at all.

Original poster
steamingirn · 28/01/2023 13:53

The great thing is I'm
Absolute allergic to him so I don't care that he's actually on bumble but the insult of him begging me telling me not ..to worry that he won't take his life ...etc etcConfused

OP posts:
Cocobutt · 28/01/2023 13:53

If he’s your ex then it’s perfectly reasonable for him to be on a dating site and trying to move on.

It has no association with him wanting you back at all (unless the letter explicitly states that he’ll never use OLD).

Cocobutt · 28/01/2023 13:55

I agree with the PP to just ignore it and not give him the time of day.

AdInfinitum12 · 28/01/2023 13:56

I think the response that would annoy him most is honestly..no response.

If you show anger, or point out his hypocrisy it's still showing that he's taking up space in your brain. It'll irritate him so much more knowing you've read the letter and not even given him the energy of a response.

LaLuz7 · 28/01/2023 13:56

Cocobutt · 28/01/2023 13:53

If he’s your ex then it’s perfectly reasonable for him to be on a dating site and trying to move on.

It has no association with him wanting you back at all (unless the letter explicitly states that he’ll never use OLD).

It totally does. It sends the message that he's not having much luck on OLD so he might as well settle for her. If he was honest in his desire to get her back he wouldn't be prospecting other options while whining about how much he loves her. He's an absolute manipulative hypocrite

Serpensortia · 28/01/2023 13:56

Screenshot his bumble profile and send a copy of it back to him with his letter. No need to say anything else. He doesn't deserve one word from you, ever again.

shiningstar2 · 28/01/2023 13:59

Bas...
Useless
Moron
Brat
Looser
Eff orf 😁