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AIBU?

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Original poster

My boyfriends brother liked my bikini photo on my Instagram. Boyfriend wants me to take it doen

52 replies

Nikki2ol6 · 22/05/2022 08:51

Last year I uploaded a photo of my sunbathing in a bikini in my back garden. With a caption of my plans for the full day (it was due a nice day all day) it got quite a few likes very quickly. One of those was my boyfriends brother who is significantly older than me by around 15 years. My boyfriend seen the picture and didn’t like the picture and yesterday mentioned it and told me to take it down! It’s been up there a full year almost it’s surly a bit late to take it down everyone has seen it now and I personally don’t see what the problem is besides an issue with his brother liking it because that didn’t feel right. Should I do as he asks and take it down?

OP posts:
Opaljewel · 22/05/2022 08:53

No don't take it down.

Not your fault creepy older brother has been creeping.
Don't like your boyfriend police your life. If you give in, it will go into bigger things as time goes on.

Tell him to tell his brother to stop creeping on your insta. Or better yet, block him.

Chocaholic9 · 22/05/2022 08:53

Why would you post a bikini photo anyway? I don't understand why people do this - it's attention seeking. Everyone knows that the only people who like bikini photos on Instagram are thirsty pervs.

Opaljewel · 22/05/2022 08:53

Don't let* not like sorry.

Beamur · 22/05/2022 08:54

If he's unhappy with his brother liking a picture of you in a bikini he should take it up with his brother.
Is he controlling or jealous in other ways?

Opaljewel · 22/05/2022 08:54

Chocaholic9 · 22/05/2022 08:53

Why would you post a bikini photo anyway? I don't understand why people do this - it's attention seeking. Everyone knows that the only people who like bikini photos on Instagram are thirsty pervs.

It's her instagram though? She can do what she likes? If I had a killer bikini bod, I'd be posting myself too. 😁

SpringIntoChaos · 22/05/2022 08:55

Tell him to fuck off. Literally...say, "fuck off"!

Antarcticant · 22/05/2022 08:56

If it's been up a year there's little point, and it's your decision, not your boyfriend's.

SpringIntoChaos · 22/05/2022 08:58

Chocaholic9 · 22/05/2022 08:53

Why would you post a bikini photo anyway? I don't understand why people do this - it's attention seeking. Everyone knows that the only people who like bikini photos on Instagram are thirsty pervs.

I didn't "know" this, but thanks for enlightening me 👍 (thank heavens for Mumsnet, I've learnt about so many rules that I've been breaking throughout my life on here 😱)

lancsgirl85 · 22/05/2022 09:01

Does your boyfriend's brother follow you? Or had he looked you up specifically to like your pictures? I think that makes a difference tbh. If he's someone who just likes everything on his newsfeed, it's less pervy. If he's looked you up to like your pics, that's weird. Either way though it has naff all to do with your boyfriend what you post on there.

Pandarinio · 22/05/2022 09:03

Everyone who wanted to could have already taken a screenshot to enjoy later if they'd wanted. Taking it down is pointless.

toomuchlaundry · 22/05/2022 09:08

Does the brother like other photos you post on Instagram or just ones in your bikini?

Nothappyatwork · 22/05/2022 09:08

Pandarinio · 22/05/2022 09:03

Everyone who wanted to could have already taken a screenshot to enjoy later if they'd wanted. Taking it down is pointless.

Including the brother seems unlikely he is secretly enjoying the OP, he’s now outted himself by publicly liking it.

Isitsixoclockalready · 22/05/2022 09:08

I'm a little confused although maybe there is a back story with the brother. The photo got quite a few likes - presumably not people being pervy but just being nice and liking a photo that someone has put on Instagram. Unless he was putting some dubious comments underneath, is there a danger in reading too much into it? Yes, also it's your photo OP so it's your choice to leave it up or not.

girlmom21 · 22/05/2022 09:12

It's been a year - he needs to get over it.

MmeMeursault · 22/05/2022 09:14

Is your boyfriend generally controlling in other areas too? Does he expect you to do as you're told?

Keep the post, ditch the BF.

OneTonNoodles · 22/05/2022 09:14

Leave it up.

Why does he want you to take it down?

He sounds a bit controlling. Is this the first time he's acted like this?

Butchyrestingface · 22/05/2022 09:18

Chocaholic9 · 22/05/2022 08:53

Why would you post a bikini photo anyway? I don't understand why people do this - it's attention seeking. Everyone knows that the only people who like bikini photos on Instagram are thirsty pervs.

Shite. I must be a thirsty perv then because I've done it.

Should I change my username to forewarn peeps?

Ffsmakeitstop · 22/05/2022 09:18

Does he allow you to wear your bikini to the beach or swimming pool or do you have to cover up?

The brother is just admiring your photo which is presumably why you put it up.

Georgeskitchen · 22/05/2022 09:21

Unless your account is totally locked down ( I don't do Instagram so not sure how it works) I'm guessing anyone can see it, or you've accepted the brother as a follower? My view is, and maybe I'm old fashioned , but if you don't like men "liking" your bikini pics, don't post them publicly

lancsgirl85 · 22/05/2022 09:29

Unless your account is totally locked down ( I don't do Instagram so not sure how it works) I'm guessing anyone can see it, or you've accepted the brother as a follower?

Yep. Only 2 ways for someone to see your stuff on Instagram - accept them as a follower or have a public account that anyone can see.

FlippityFlapperty · 22/05/2022 09:31

ANY photo posted on Instagram is put there because the person in it thinks they look decent. Nobody uploads photos of them looking terrible. If you look good in a bikini, why not? Keep the picture up. It’s the brother he should have the problem with, not you.

Also, sometimes I do like people’s photos simply as I know them and I know it would make them feel nice to have positive comments, not because I’m perving at them. So your bf is possibly jumping to conclusions a bit about his brother’s motives. If he liked it a year ago along with everyone else then that’s not as big an issue as it would be if he liked it recently and was going back a year into your pics! So, YANBU.

The only way I’d be on your BFs side here is that it possibly makes a bit of difference about the kind of bikini picture - if you’re just sitting about normally, fine. If you are on all fours sucking an ice lolly and his brother liked that, maybe not!

Iwonder08 · 22/05/2022 09:49

Posting bikini pictures on social media is attention seeking and you don't get to complain that men look at them. Do you think the picture is fine as long as only young guys look at it? Your boyfriend doesn't get to say what should you do with your pictures on your social media though.

sweeneytoddsrazor · 22/05/2022 09:58

You know back in the day before insta, everyone had cameras and showed off the printed photos to everyone. People would politely comment on them. There was always bikini photos the only difference someone else had to take them they weren't selfies

Pandarinio · 22/05/2022 10:00

Nothappyatwork · 22/05/2022 09:08

Including the brother seems unlikely he is secretly enjoying the OP, he’s now outted himself by publicly liking it.

Show quote history

Well yeah, I didn't say it was secret. Just that it's out there now so no point taking it down.

Pandarinio · 22/05/2022 10:02

FlippityFlapperty · 22/05/2022 09:31

ANY photo posted on Instagram is put there because the person in it thinks they look decent. Nobody uploads photos of them looking terrible. If you look good in a bikini, why not? Keep the picture up. It’s the brother he should have the problem with, not you.

Also, sometimes I do like people’s photos simply as I know them and I know it would make them feel nice to have positive comments, not because I’m perving at them. So your bf is possibly jumping to conclusions a bit about his brother’s motives. If he liked it a year ago along with everyone else then that’s not as big an issue as it would be if he liked it recently and was going back a year into your pics! So, YANBU.

The only way I’d be on your BFs side here is that it possibly makes a bit of difference about the kind of bikini picture - if you’re just sitting about normally, fine. If you are on all fours sucking an ice lolly and his brother liked that, maybe not!

But even if it was the 2nd one, why does it matter that his brother has liked it? Presumably he's not the only one who's gone oooh niiiice.