Annoyed at comments over hair cut!

[november90]

I've had long hair my whole life and always loved it. Long, thick, blonde hair. Recently I decided I wanted a change and had around 8 inches cut off and have had it cut into a long job. This is a massive change for me. I've never ever had short hair. I actually love it! Ima. Single mum and I feel so much more glam with lower maintenance hair which is easier for the school run etc. I do feel a bit self conscious because I've never had short hair before, but I do feel excited about it!
I have had a few comments though off a few MALEs saying "it's a sign of getting old women cutting their hair", "you'll never have long hair now, women never do when they cut it short as they cba with it" etc etc etc. You get my point. This has honestly really annoyed me, I feel it's such a back handed compliment and such a rubbish thing to say to someone whose made such a big change! Am I being touchy?
To our into context one of the people who said this was my children's dad/EX.
:(

I'm also 30. So not old 😡

YANBU he's being a twat. Remember he's an ex for a reason and enjoy your new haircut.

“Actually, the biggest change was cutting your four inches from my life, thank you ex”

You need comebacks. Maybe a few can be rustled up here.

I find people are weird about hair. From parents, controlling their kids to partners expressing their preference and opinions. It's really strange.

Long hair is a pain in the arse. I haven't had it since I was 7. My mother was gutted I wanted it cut.
See, weird.

If they've not got anything nice to say then they should shut up in my opinion.

Having said I do think on the whole the older women get, the more they seem to have short hair (which is fine by the way). I don't think they're wrong on their observations and you might be being a bit touchy, but there was still no reason for them to pass comment in the first place.

I contemplated having what DH and I joked as a 'mom bob' after DC arrived but experience tells me that short hair on me is much more upkeep than long.

How is it a backhanded compliment? There's no compliment in saying you're getting old

It's because it looks good he's trying to put you down

So rude,

You have cut your hair, now cut him out.

Thanks all I think I needed to vent! I just thought, on today's world it can be hard getting older as if it... I don't need to be told that my new cool hair cut is a sign of me being old! In fact even my sister said I look older! Is this how people just see me now?! ☹️
TBH I just wanted a change... didn't want to have the same hair my whole life! It has nothing to Dow too my age it's a shame that people feel necessary to pass remark about that!

Ugh why are people so flipping rude? A few years ago I cut my longish hair into a short asymmetric bob type thing. Went to work the next day and a colleague said "You used to look young and now you just look your age!" And then he stormed off! It made me feel awful. He could have just said nothing surely! I certainly had never felt the need to comment on his hair etc.

I have had a few comments though off a few MALEs saying "it's a sign of getting old women cutting their hair", "you'll never have long hair now, women never do when they cut it short as they cba with it" etc etc etc

how many of them have long hair? because they cba? Older women with long (especially long grey) hair get comments about looking like crones, hags & witches. We can't win. Tell them to fuck off? grow their own hair because it would make them look younger and more attractive?

I think shorter hair always looks youthful, friends who have had a big chop always look about 5yrs younger after. You obviously look great, he wouldn’t have brought it up otherwise! If someone gives me a bitchy comment like that, I put on a huge grin, and gush, ‘thanks so much, that’s really sweet of you’. Then watch their face as they try and work out how to tell me that it wasn’t a compliment and they were being purposefully rude - funnily enough they never do!

People are twats. My hair is so unmanageable, it’s very thick, hold water and isn’t straight. Even when straightened it stays OK, until I step out the door and it immediately goes to crap at the slightest hint of moisture 😫. It isn’t wavy either, just dries to a big (think Monica in Barbados big) frizzy mess.

So I chopped it last year into a pixie. The man who sits next to me at football asked “Why have you cut your hair off?” I just said “Because I wanted to”. It does take some styling everyday but it’s far quicker than arsing about when it’s long to still look shit anyway.

Agree sadly about the ravages of age, while pointing out their paunch or receding hairline.

Blimey you know some strange people!

What a stereotype they think you should be!

And of course women grow hair again if they want to!

I used to have very long hair (thick, glossy and very dark) and got loads of compliments but it was the biggest pain in the arse to maintain. When I split up with ExH I cut it up into a long bob too and had loads of people giving me their unwanted opinion. That was about 7 years ago now and I absolutely love it still (I've actually gone shorter at times).

It bet it looks lovely on you!

Deadpan… that’s weird, I don’t remember asking for your opinion?

I’m sure you look amazing. Ignore the twats.

I do see a lot of school mums hit their 40s, getting the bob. To me it's a sign of old age because the hairs thinner, and shorter hair makes it look thicker. My friends do look better with shorter hair. My hair is becoming thinner and dry, so I can see me getting a bob in a few years time! Long hair does look more youthful, so I can see why people would comment, as its a change of perception.

Thanks all I think I needed to vent! I just thought, on today's world it can be hard getting older as if it... I don't need to be told that my new cool hair cut is a sign of me being old! In fact even my sister said I look older! Is this how people just see me now?!
That's so rude of her!

I don't think it's you though OP. A huge industry makes a lot of money by linking a woman's worth and esteem to appearing youthful. It shouldn't be news that human beings age.

Just because lots of women opt for shorter hair as they get older doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with opting for shorter hair. People like your sister and others need to keep their opinions to themselves unless they're asked to give their opinions.

It is a blessed joy to reach the stage where you don't give a flying f what other people think of your hair .. or your clothes, your home decor, your driving, your life decisions, ad nauseum.

It's liberating, OP, if you like it (and even if you don't) it doesn't matter what other people think.

Ignore them I think the longer bob is gorgeous and easy to maintain.
Long hair is dated unless cultural I assume it is hair extensions on a lot of women.

They are being rude. I'd smile witheringly and say, sarcastically 'how funny'.

"Long hair is dated unless cultural I assume it is hair extensions on a lot of women."

WTF?

Enjoy your new look Forget rude people like your ex trying to make you feel bad. There is nothing wrong with getting old anyway (the alternative isn’t something most people want ). But you’re not there yet. 30 is still young but getting wiser, more confident, adventurous, experienced and you are more sure of yourself. The older you get the more confident and comfortable with yourself you get and start to care less what other people think of you. Enjoy it (I’m in my 40’s).

WTF?
I'm not trying to be offensive long hair is beautiful and a huge part of culture's and countries.
Thailand, Philippines, India, travelling community.
Generally I do assume long voluminous locks are hair extensions which are false and dated IMO.